Q&A: Who's a Train Wreck?
Okay - every time I come back to the boards I forget to check back in and I'm gone for awhile. For some reason I feel the need to be here. Maybe I'm just deciding I need to get my head screwed on straight. Maybe I read enough to realize I'm not the only one feeling stressed.
So, I'm wondering if you'll play along - copy and paste the questions and respond with your own answers. Maybe I'm the only one needing an overview, but hopefully it will be helpful.
1) What was your highest weight, lowest post-op weight and current weight?
325, 175, 195
2) Have you had any major stressors in your life since wls? (Just a list)
Marriage problems
Family health issues
Brother suicide
House remodel
Going into debt because of the remodel
3) Which, if any of these, do you feel might have been brought about or uncovered due to wls?
Marriage problems. The problems were there for awhile but I was too afraid to address them. Perhaps I expected wls to fix that for me, for whatever reason, and when it didn't, I started actively giving up.
4) Have you found that you have replaced food with other bad habits? If so, please list.
Unfortunately, yes.
I started smoking again
I have been "enjoying" wine too much lately.
I have no energy and no desire to actually do anything besides work
5) Are you happy right now?
I'm not really a happy camper, but neither am I in the depths of depression. I am struggling to find a happy place. I'm looking for a way to gain control of myself and force myself to move. Force myself to start participating in life again.
6) Do you think wls has had a positive or negative effect on your life?
Positive. Most of the things I am dealing with now I could not have changed. Perhaps I would have reacted differently, but that may have packed another 100 lbs on my frame. I hurt enough at 195 and I would be a wreck at 400. My life is what it is. Good and bad. Having had wls made me come to some realizations about myself, has given me more self-confidence and keeps me from the circular pattern of self-loathing, feeling sorry for myself, trying to fix it, failing and back to self-loathing again. I'm forced to face some things I might otherwise have put on the back burner so I could hate myself more pre-wls.
Thanks for playing. Add more questions if you like. I'm running out of thoughts.
So, I'm wondering if you'll play along - copy and paste the questions and respond with your own answers. Maybe I'm the only one needing an overview, but hopefully it will be helpful.
1) What was your highest weight, lowest post-op weight and current weight?
325, 175, 195
2) Have you had any major stressors in your life since wls? (Just a list)
Marriage problems
Family health issues
Brother suicide
House remodel
Going into debt because of the remodel
3) Which, if any of these, do you feel might have been brought about or uncovered due to wls?
Marriage problems. The problems were there for awhile but I was too afraid to address them. Perhaps I expected wls to fix that for me, for whatever reason, and when it didn't, I started actively giving up.
4) Have you found that you have replaced food with other bad habits? If so, please list.
Unfortunately, yes.
I started smoking again
I have been "enjoying" wine too much lately.
I have no energy and no desire to actually do anything besides work
5) Are you happy right now?
I'm not really a happy camper, but neither am I in the depths of depression. I am struggling to find a happy place. I'm looking for a way to gain control of myself and force myself to move. Force myself to start participating in life again.
6) Do you think wls has had a positive or negative effect on your life?
Positive. Most of the things I am dealing with now I could not have changed. Perhaps I would have reacted differently, but that may have packed another 100 lbs on my frame. I hurt enough at 195 and I would be a wreck at 400. My life is what it is. Good and bad. Having had wls made me come to some realizations about myself, has given me more self-confidence and keeps me from the circular pattern of self-loathing, feeling sorry for myself, trying to fix it, failing and back to self-loathing again. I'm forced to face some things I might otherwise have put on the back burner so I could hate myself more pre-wls.
Thanks for playing. Add more questions if you like. I'm running out of thoughts.
I like my men like I like my coffee...strong, hot, and steamy!!! 
I Like these types of questions, they make me really think and get refocused on whats going on in my life.
1) What was your highest weight, lowest post-op weight and current weight?
248-160-160
2) Have you had any major stressors in your life since wls? (Just a list)
1. moved
2. husband new job positon
3 family death
4. son problems
5. dealing with school system. daughter is learning disabled and getting help from school is a full time job
6. brother lost his leg
7. alot of health issues with friends and family
8. raising 9 puppies ...but that was fun
9 saying goodbye to my gallbladder
10. patio building our 3 yr project argggg.
3) Which, if any of these, do you feel might have been brought about or uncovered due to wls?
#9 the gallbladder...maybe
4) Have you found that you have replaced food with other bad habits? If so, please list.
Yes, unfortunatly I started smoking again....
5) Are you happy right now?
Genuinly...yes...but totally stressed out at the moment. My life is good, its just worrying about the so many others in my life.
6) Do you think wls has had a positive or negative effect on your life?
100% positive...feeling better, healthier, confidence is back, active again, basically just a happier person. Ide do it again in a heartbeat!
1) What was your highest weight, lowest post-op weight and current weight?
248-160-160
2) Have you had any major stressors in your life since wls? (Just a list)
1. moved
2. husband new job positon
3 family death
4. son problems
5. dealing with school system. daughter is learning disabled and getting help from school is a full time job
6. brother lost his leg
7. alot of health issues with friends and family
8. raising 9 puppies ...but that was fun
9 saying goodbye to my gallbladder
10. patio building our 3 yr project argggg.
3) Which, if any of these, do you feel might have been brought about or uncovered due to wls?
#9 the gallbladder...maybe
4) Have you found that you have replaced food with other bad habits? If so, please list.
Yes, unfortunatly I started smoking again....
5) Are you happy right now?
Genuinly...yes...but totally stressed out at the moment. My life is good, its just worrying about the so many others in my life.
6) Do you think wls has had a positive or negative effect on your life?
100% positive...feeling better, healthier, confidence is back, active again, basically just a happier person. Ide do it again in a heartbeat!
Having you back is so wonderful, don't go away again. Ok, here goes:
1. Highest weight, lowest post-op weight, and current weight: If you mean highest weight just before surgery (I've been higher): 368/138/150
2. Major stressors in life since surgery:
daughter left home (college, but she's essentially grown up and gone)
marriage problems, quite serious - we vacilate between a breath away from separating and not imagining living apart - right now we're in a good place
son problems, quite serious (just turned 15) - he is very strong and can be very threatening, very disrespectful and ugly - but he doesn't want to be; I believe he is responding to our marraige problems, and he has an addictive personality
low feelings of self-worth, developed in childhood, just won't go away-feel worthless a lot
3. What have been uncovered because of surgery:
I'd say the marraige problems have really been uncovered, and we are really trying to deal with it
4. Replaced food with other bad habits?
I'm still food addicted, absolutely. Very strong addiction to M&Ms, it's so weird. I am still an emotional eater. I have another issue that I can't talk about publicly but it's always been there, again stems from very very bad childhood
5. Am I happy right now?
In many ways, much happier than I've ever been. I love to move my body. I love to feel it move. I love the feeling of being physically active, of being able to do all the things I was never able to do for most of my life. That makes me very very happy. To get on the trampoline with my son, to ride Laela, to go miles in my kayak, to be with Jim - this all makes me very very happy. But I don't feel worthy of it, I don't feel pretty or smart or competent or capable or well, worth anything - I can't shake it. And yes, I'm on meds. It doesn't help.
6. Was WLS a positive or negative effect on my life?
Without it I'd be dead by now, I'm certain of it, if not by the co-morbidities, than by my own doing. I could not go on living that way. For the most part my body remains fit and strong and it allows me to do things every day that I could only fantasize about doing, that is a very positive effect on my life, and the lives of my children and my husband. But it didn't help my head. My head still hurts in an emotional way. My head is stil so sad so much of the time.
Dina, stay - just stay. Maureen
1. Highest weight, lowest post-op weight, and current weight: If you mean highest weight just before surgery (I've been higher): 368/138/150
2. Major stressors in life since surgery:
daughter left home (college, but she's essentially grown up and gone)
marriage problems, quite serious - we vacilate between a breath away from separating and not imagining living apart - right now we're in a good place
son problems, quite serious (just turned 15) - he is very strong and can be very threatening, very disrespectful and ugly - but he doesn't want to be; I believe he is responding to our marraige problems, and he has an addictive personality
low feelings of self-worth, developed in childhood, just won't go away-feel worthless a lot
3. What have been uncovered because of surgery:
I'd say the marraige problems have really been uncovered, and we are really trying to deal with it
4. Replaced food with other bad habits?
I'm still food addicted, absolutely. Very strong addiction to M&Ms, it's so weird. I am still an emotional eater. I have another issue that I can't talk about publicly but it's always been there, again stems from very very bad childhood
5. Am I happy right now?
In many ways, much happier than I've ever been. I love to move my body. I love to feel it move. I love the feeling of being physically active, of being able to do all the things I was never able to do for most of my life. That makes me very very happy. To get on the trampoline with my son, to ride Laela, to go miles in my kayak, to be with Jim - this all makes me very very happy. But I don't feel worthy of it, I don't feel pretty or smart or competent or capable or well, worth anything - I can't shake it. And yes, I'm on meds. It doesn't help.
6. Was WLS a positive or negative effect on my life?
Without it I'd be dead by now, I'm certain of it, if not by the co-morbidities, than by my own doing. I could not go on living that way. For the most part my body remains fit and strong and it allows me to do things every day that I could only fantasize about doing, that is a very positive effect on my life, and the lives of my children and my husband. But it didn't help my head. My head still hurts in an emotional way. My head is stil so sad so much of the time.
Dina, stay - just stay. Maureen
How ya doin' today? I don't like this new format, you can see how many people are lurking, reading your posts but then not responding to them - makes me feel creepy, like people are reading my diary or something and then sneaking away - maybe it's a more realistic picture of what these boards are really like...I'm thinking I don't like this very much at all ...how you doin' Dina? I'm not doing too well today - I'm not just a train wreck today, I'm bonafide derailed...Maureen
1) What was your highest weight, lowest post-op weight and current weight?
340; 204; 228
2) Have you had any major stressors in your life since wls? (Just a list)
Some Marriage issues
Had a daughter
Daughter teething (104-105) temps
money problems
work issues
home issues
General depression
3) Which, if any of these, do you feel might have been brought about or uncovered due to wls?
None really.
4) Have you found that you have replaced food with other bad habits? If so, please list.
Still food addicted really. It sucks which is why i can't loose the rest of my weight.
I also like to drink but know I have to be careful. I know I COULD replace the addiction, but don't want to go that route.
5) Are you happy right now?
Not really. Not overall. I love my kids don't get me wrong and find much joy there... but with myself...have much work to do. There is so much I want to change yet just haven't. I feel like I'm dragging my feet all the damned time and it makes me nuts. Why can't I just do what I need to do?
6) Do you think wls has had a positive or negative effect on your life?
Positive. Loosing weight for me is always positive, but then again, I haven't lost all the weight that I need to. Its sooooo frustrating and is the bane of my depression. Only I can fix it and it drives me nuts that I can't seem to do it!!! Why food has such power over me is beyond my understanding. It's always such a struggle. Hate it.
I LOVE you're man quote!!!! haha!!! hot and steamy is always best!!!! (wink) i've been engrossed in romance novels and im driving myself nuts (hahaha)...
1) What was your highest weight, lowest post-op weight and current weight?
309, 157, 172
2) Have you had any major stressors in your life since wls? (Just a list)
got engaged
got unengaged
dated
dated
dated
money problems
youngest son moved out empty nester now
mean nasty old boss
changed jobs
got a nice happy boss
dated
dated
dated
daughter got married had to see the ex. yuck (i looked good! yeah!)
got a new man! yummm
got money problems under control! ooooo
paid monthly bills all on time for 9 months in a row and counting! yeahhhhhh
not alot of sleep due to new man! woooo hoooooo!
3) Which, if any of these, do you feel might have been brought about or uncovered due to wls?
Money problems due to old job not covering about 3500 of surgery. ex engagement due to finally feeling self worth. have to say though if it wasn't for feeling that self worth due to losing the weight i'd never have gotten the courage to go on to a better paying job.
4) Have you found that you have replaced food with other bad habits? If so, please list.
shopping but then again I've always been a shopper. its under control. still got the food adiction its kinda like alchol or drugs food - well its my addiction of choice.
5) Are you happy right now?
I'm good. I'm one of those annoyingly happy people. sure I get down sometimes when things don't go my way but hey thats life.
6) Do you think wls has had a positive or negative effect on your life?
Positive. 200%
I like me. I might not be perfect but I'm the best I've ever been in my whole life.
309, 157, 172
2) Have you had any major stressors in your life since wls? (Just a list)
got engaged
got unengaged
dated
dated
dated
money problems
youngest son moved out empty nester now
mean nasty old boss
changed jobs
got a nice happy boss
dated
dated
dated
daughter got married had to see the ex. yuck (i looked good! yeah!)
got a new man! yummm
got money problems under control! ooooo
paid monthly bills all on time for 9 months in a row and counting! yeahhhhhh
not alot of sleep due to new man! woooo hoooooo!
3) Which, if any of these, do you feel might have been brought about or uncovered due to wls?
Money problems due to old job not covering about 3500 of surgery. ex engagement due to finally feeling self worth. have to say though if it wasn't for feeling that self worth due to losing the weight i'd never have gotten the courage to go on to a better paying job.
4) Have you found that you have replaced food with other bad habits? If so, please list.
shopping but then again I've always been a shopper. its under control. still got the food adiction its kinda like alchol or drugs food - well its my addiction of choice.
5) Are you happy right now?
I'm good. I'm one of those annoyingly happy people. sure I get down sometimes when things don't go my way but hey thats life.
6) Do you think wls has had a positive or negative effect on your life?
Positive. 200%
I like me. I might not be perfect but I'm the best I've ever been in my whole life.
Ok, so here goes....
1) What was your highest weight, lowest post-op weight and current weight?
250,148,160
2) Have you had any major stressors in your life since wls? (Just a list)
Father passed away
lost job
daughter left for college
moved
got new job
3) Which, if any of these, do you feel might have been brought about or uncovered due to wls?
None. These things would have occurred regardless of my weight.
4) Have you found that you have replaced food with other bad habits? If so, please list.
Yes and no. I was drinking quite a bit, but have cut back dramatically because I stopped craving it.
5) Are you happy right now?
Actually, yes I am. I have a wonderful man in my life, a job I love and things are actually really great. It scares me to type this.
6) Do you think wls has had a positive or negative effect on your life?
Positive. I feel so much better about myself and able to do more things. I am no longer feeling the depression, despair and hopelessness I felt when I was heavy.
1) What was your highest weight, lowest post-op weight and current weight?
250,148,160
2) Have you had any major stressors in your life since wls? (Just a list)
Father passed away
lost job
daughter left for college
moved
got new job
3) Which, if any of these, do you feel might have been brought about or uncovered due to wls?
None. These things would have occurred regardless of my weight.
4) Have you found that you have replaced food with other bad habits? If so, please list.
Yes and no. I was drinking quite a bit, but have cut back dramatically because I stopped craving it.
5) Are you happy right now?
Actually, yes I am. I have a wonderful man in my life, a job I love and things are actually really great. It scares me to type this.
6) Do you think wls has had a positive or negative effect on your life?
Positive. I feel so much better about myself and able to do more things. I am no longer feeling the depression, despair and hopelessness I felt when I was heavy.
1) What was your highest weight, lowest post-op weight and current weight?
298,161,199
2) Have you had any major stressors in your life since wls? (Just a list)
Mother passed away
husband lost job
husband traveled for work gone 2-3 weeks a month
husband got a new job but only works 2-3 days a week
son lost sped eligibility and went to middle school
moved grade levels at work 2x
had a grand mal seizure at work
3) Which, if any of these, do you feel might have been brought about or uncovered due to wls?
Most of the things would have occurred regardless of my weight. I do believe the seizure is directly related to my WLS.
4) Have you found that you have replaced food with other bad habits? If so, please list.
Yes and no. I was drinking quite a bit, I did smoke off and on.
and I enjoyed the attention of other men a bit too much. even tho it didn't bring me any happiness
5) Are you happy right now?
Uhm...happy...sort of. I feel guilty to be moving on with my life and not thinking about my mom with every breath but it is happening. I am happy with the kids in my classroom, they are a fun group. I am pleased with the teachers my kids have and how well tehy are doing right now.
happy tho??? in myself???
no, how about content? probably yes there.
6) Do you think wls has had a positive or negative effect on your life?
Positive. I feel so much better about myself and able to do more things. I am no longer feeling the depression, despair and hopelessness I felt when I was heavy.
nic
298,161,199
2) Have you had any major stressors in your life since wls? (Just a list)
Mother passed away
husband lost job
husband traveled for work gone 2-3 weeks a month
husband got a new job but only works 2-3 days a week
son lost sped eligibility and went to middle school
moved grade levels at work 2x
had a grand mal seizure at work
3) Which, if any of these, do you feel might have been brought about or uncovered due to wls?
Most of the things would have occurred regardless of my weight. I do believe the seizure is directly related to my WLS.
4) Have you found that you have replaced food with other bad habits? If so, please list.
Yes and no. I was drinking quite a bit, I did smoke off and on.
and I enjoyed the attention of other men a bit too much. even tho it didn't bring me any happiness
5) Are you happy right now?
Uhm...happy...sort of. I feel guilty to be moving on with my life and not thinking about my mom with every breath but it is happening. I am happy with the kids in my classroom, they are a fun group. I am pleased with the teachers my kids have and how well tehy are doing right now.
happy tho??? in myself???
no, how about content? probably yes there.
6) Do you think wls has had a positive or negative effect on your life?
Positive. I feel so much better about myself and able to do more things. I am no longer feeling the depression, despair and hopelessness I felt when I was heavy.
nic
Most Active
Recent Topics
