Ugh! Carbs!

After fighting down my consumption of carbs, I was starting to feel more energetic. But I don't know what happened to me the last few days--I guess I just let my guard down and now I am back to craving and munching. And I am tired (which makes me hungry...) OK--gotta get back on track. No one said this was easy, did they? If you are off the wagon too, come on and get back on with me... Joy

You Can Do it Joy!!! I know you can. If I can give up Starbucks you can give up carbs. Right ther with you. Ladybug Marilyn

I saw 150 on the scale this morning for the first time since I got below that mark 3 years ago; I was devestated. I also have admitted to myself that I have become addicted to the candy at work - when I can't go a day without stuffing fistfuls of it in my mouth despite Herculean efforts not to do so - that's addiction. I've not had it today; I've changed into my workout clothes and I will try very, very hard to take care of myself today by eating well and working out. There's a sign in my therapist's office that reads: "Courage doesn't always have to roar. Sometimes, courage is just a quiet voice that says, "I will try again tomorrow." Well, I'm trying again today. And instead of giving in to the sadness of this relapse--which will make me want to hurt myself with food--I will celebrate my courage to keep trying. You too, Joy. You too. Love, Reenie

Yeah, I had that experience with 160 a few weeks ago. Today I was 158 though, so at least I'm going the right direction. That is still a full 20 lbs above my low. But you know what? I am NOT a number on a scale! I want to control my addictions because I want control over my life and health. I will not allow myself to be controlled by a scale or a size tag either. I'm human, and I will always be pulled in harmful directions. But with God's help, and this marvelous gift of WLS, I will keep living my life. Eating is necessary to that life, and even enjoyable, but it is not my life. We just have to get up one more time than we fall down... Joy

I can only speak for myself, Joy, but I weigh myself every morning. I view this as a progress report, the same way I view my son's report card as telling me what kind of effort he's putting into his school work. Of course, I know what I'm doing "wrong" on a daily basis but the numbers on the scale are a visual aid to keep me vigilent. I know that I'm in a different place than I was a year ago; "Learning to live with food" a year ago was a lot easier because I didn't have the hunger to deal with. It's a hell of a lot easier to abstain from eating harmful amounts of bad quality food when hunger (I don't care if it's head hunger or physical hunger) is not the root of the problem. I wasn't hungry a year ago. I sure as hell am these days. Every day. So, just like with every other stage of this journey, it's time to adapt and to employ new strategies. Weighing myself daily helps me, I know that for sure. Some days eating is more my life than others and I'm fighting that with everything I have. Thanks for being there - always. I don't know what I'd do without you. Reenie