I'm Not Fat

Just because I have season tickets for the symphony doesn't mean I have any class or that I'm well mannered. I was at the symphony tonight and sitting in my seat during the intermission. The rows are not terribly wide and a woman was edging her way in front of me to get to her seat. She turned to me and said, "This is pretty tight. I wonder how fat people get through." Oh man, I was about to stand up and tell her something to the effect of, "Probably the same way stupid people get through, you seem to be doing fine." when I realized that she wasn't taking a jab at me. Oh yeah, I forgot, I'm not fat. What she said was still rude and I still would have let her know that her comment was rude, but I was too happy not being fat that she was long gone before I came out of my happy to not be fat moment. Connie

Connie, I can so relate to your post! Despite the fact that I'm supposedly not a fat person, I still have the soul and the sensitivity of one! I think that it is similar to alcoholism in that although we "are on the wagon", we still have the underlying disease with all of it's issues. I will always be bothered by fat jokes whether they are directed at me or not. I'm always uncomfortable hearing people disparage fat folks, but I only occasionally respond to it. I guess that I just can't go through life fighting unending battles with unthinking idiots! I occasionally can't help myself and need to respond, but I'm sorry to say that I let it ride more often than I should. I feel that I should be an advocate for the obese, since I've been there....done that, but I still don't have the self-confidence to be as aggressive as I'd like. I must admit, that while painful, fat jokes are much less painful than they once were and that scares me a bit. Mike

No you are not fat anymore, but, I do no how it feels to be around people that say things. It is a hard world we live in & being formerly fat person we can sure relate to those that are fat or heavy as the case may be. I right there with you & Mike too!! It is hard to not feel something, even though a lot of people don't realize that we were fat at one time & not so long ago. Marilyn, the Bearlady

you know when i'm out at a group situation i will usually go and stand with the heavier people. they are the ones that i still feel comfortable with! at first when i go towards their group they look at me strange but i stay quiet at the edge of the group like i always use to. eventually there will be something that i will have to say depending on the what the conversation is about. after a while they lose the looks they give me like i don't belong with them and I am welcome. i know this sounds silly but when i was heavy i was always accepted by my heavy peers now my peers have changed but who i am inside is the same! i can go over to the thin peers i just don't feel totally comfortable there. don't tell me it shouldn't be this way. i can't help it that people are strange like that. i can't help it that i am at my age trying to find myself yet again! all i know is I like the old peer group. they are funnier, have better receipes, and they are usually more excepting of who people are. anyone have these odd feelings too?