An Observation - Long as Usual

I apologize if I didn't respond before. I thought I had. I think I read and commit to respond and then get sidetracked sometimes. Life has been so hectic lately. As for emotional eating, I won't say I don't do it, but I don't do it like I used to when I was a kid. Somewhere along my early 20's the lightbulb went on and I discovered that I didn't enjoy eating to the point of hurting. So I quit doing it. I should add: On a regular basis. On a rare occasion I would indulge too much and hurt, but it was the exception, not the rule. Still, I ended up with a stretched out stomach and I could eat a LOT. It took a lot to fill me up - make me no longer hungry. But I was also teased mercilessly for my weight as a kid, so I was hyper aware of what I looked like when eating. I didn't want people seeing me eat. I skipped eating lunch all through Junior High and High school. Believe me, I could shove the food down, but I did not do it in front of anyone but close family. And I didn't push my way in to get to xyz. *Because* the fat girl was expected to be that way, I gravitated to wallflower... I did everything I could to not be noticed and it always angered me when people would make assumptions about fat people when I took great pains to not fall into that stereotype. In fact, all my fat friends were like me....we always took great pains to be dainty so as to not be perceived as gluttons. So while it certainly does happen, it's not universal. And I guess I'm still a little bit sensitive about the stereotyping. I just wanted to blend in, and there are so many out there that desire the same thing. Finally I feel like I can somewhat.... Dina

Dina, I agree with you that the majority of fat people are not this way. It's just that the people who do behave this way seem to be heavy people. I don't usually see skinny people so focused on food and controlled by a food demon. Your post reminds me of my old days eating in the car. I'd stop chewing at a stop light and sit there with a mouthful of food until the light turned green. I'd also order two whole meals at a drive through window, getting an extra drink that I didn't want so they would think I was ordering for two people instead of just me. Hugs, Connie

Oh boy do I know what you are talking about. The stopping chewing. The ordering 2 drinks thing. I did it all. And I do indeed notice habits of heavy people now too. I think the thing is that I recognize the things that make us heavy and see myself pre-surgery in that. I think I notice the froofy coffee drinks more than anything now. I see those and I get mad at myself because when it's in the hands of a heavy person I think about how it contributes to making them heavy. When I see it in the hands of a thin person, I think nothing of it.....except how good it looks. And I'm mad at myself when I find myself noticing those things because I was on the other side of that 18 months ago. And the ONE froofy coffee drink that I would have in a 6 month span would be the ONE froofy coffee drink that someone would look at and judge me on. I realize I've gotten off on a tangent and this has little to do with the original subject now, but it still feels good to get it off my chest. You always have a way to bring out instropection in us, Connie!! LOL! Dina