In a funk
Hello I'm in a funk. Tired, not hungry, when i do eat i don't fini**** casue i'm just not in the mood to eat. trying very hard to get my protein and vitamins and all that stuff we have to eat. all i want to do is sit and veg. Now this has only been since yesterday so I"m not too concerned about it.
This post is just to vent.
I've got bills to pay, laundry to do, a car that is on its last legs, a boyfriend to figure out, cat boxes to clean, my yearly review to write, my tv screen is shrinking every day its almost the size of a envelope and theres a bad smell coming from the back of the refridgerator.
sometimes its just too hard to get it all together.
I've been getting up at 4:30 to go work out at curves & then get to work an hour earlier than I'm expected, then i'm staying at work 1 to 1/2 an hour later than expected. Did I mention that I have a stressful job? Doesn't everyone? I'm seeing customers during the weekends too jsut to be a good employee but man I'm beat.
I'm trying to pick out a new car that is affordable, with high gas mileage, that will still be in good shape even after its paid off. Toyota is the one I've chosen and I've been told they've approved me for the loan but I don't like the car payments! arggggggggg
I need to shampoo the carpet, wash the windows, the stove needs to be cleaned, the dog needs a bath.
Last week I had meetings every night. I am in the fire dept and went on only 2 calls the whole week becasue of meetings. My friends tell me they never see me anymore.
I think that its time for a mental health sick day...
I feel better already!
Sorry didn't mean to vent I've just got so much to do and being that its only me sometimes its all so overwhelming. My poor mother is hard of hearing so when I call her she can't hear what I'm saying unless I'm yelling. I just give up tryign to talk becasue its constant what what what did you say? By the time I've repeated it 5 or 6 times I give up. So I let her do the talking. It does make her feel good to do that anyways.
I know I"m not alone with these feelings and overwhelming jobs that need to be done.
Thank you for letting me vent.
Pam,
I feel for you. I think we all do - we're a bunch of over-doers, for sure. If this is a temporary thing at work, like a project that has an end-date, and you feel you have to put the time in, okay. But if this is your day to day job, and this is the level of effort they are accustomed to from you, I'd recommend that you talk to them about shifting some of the workload. You joked about a mental health day but there's a note of seriousness in there, too. It's not a mental health day you're entitled to - it's comp time, because you're pulling down two extra days' worth of work a week by going in early, staying late, and working weekends. Every company is an "at-will" employer today, which means you're replaceable. Well, if you're replaceable, why are you sacrificing yourself for the company? Wearing yourself to the bone is NOT WORTH IT. Please monitor what's going on and whether or not you are allowing yourself to be taken advantage of. Most companies take their old-standby, hardest-working stiffs who put up with the abuse, for granted.
I've had lots of elderly pets, and right at the end, they stop cleaning themselves and they stop eating. You said you're unmotivated to clean and you have no desire to eat.. I'm not saying that you need to go to the vet ASAP, but please see that these are warning signs, and try to be more protective of yourself. Not being able to do it all doesn't make you weak, it makes you human. We all need A job to support ourselves, but not necessarily the job we have under the conditions we have it. You're doing the gym thing, which is awesome, but your mom's health is bringing you down, you've got relationship trouble, you're missing your friends... it doesn't sound like you've got any fun going on. Fun is the same as a vitamin, you've gotta have it. You're not just entitled to it, you need it to live. Please adjust your boundaries, especially if this is "normal", for your physical and mental well-being.
Jen
pam....take a deep breath!
venting helps-now-prioritize--- i think that the car needs to be an issue so that you can get to your job--but i think that jen is right about looking seriously at the amount of time you are spending on said job!
do you remember the old saying all work and no play?
well-play a bit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!shut off the tv and kick up some music and relax a bit-you deserve it---tell the cat to use the toilet (sounds good but mine won't either!!)
get outside and get some sunshine- the vit d is great!!!!!
just-take care of you!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pam,
I sent you an email, but I wanted to add that you might want to check out www.flylady.net. She has a web site on managing overwhelming tasks, but if you subscribe to her free email list and read the notes, you will soon realize that the problem most of us face (in life and eating) is our own perfectionism. If we can learn to love ourselves and tackle things a baby step at a time, we can slow down the overwhelming nature of life. As Flylady says, "You are not behind. Just jump in where you are!"
Joy
Pam,
When was the last time you had your bloodwork done to see if you were having any deficiencies with your vitamins? Mine was just finished a few weeks ago and my B-12 was low (normal but almost not normal..lol).....so I ever since the report came back I have been supplementing and it has made a marvelous change in my attitude, physical energy...etc.
I felt exactly like you were describing. I felt like I was in a pit that I couldn't get out of, it was like no matter what I tackeld there was something else there waiting at the end of the tunnel...a mountain of stuff to do and take care of...no end in sight ot my dilemma's.....but now I feel so much better. My daughter jokingly says it's all in my head....but I am not so sure. I think it was low energy from not supplementing my B-12, and not taking my vitamins like I should. So I just wonder if its a vitamin deficiency? Hope this helps.
Cindy
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