ARGH! What a mess!

What a mess I have made of my "healthy eating style!" I had such a bad day yesterday! I had 2 cookies, 1 sliver of entemans rasberry pastry (my favorite) they brought it in to work and it was sitting by the printer. My will power gave out towards the end of the day, as the work load increased so did my appetite! Ugh. Usually it is the opposite for me... I stress or get upset I clean or am sick to my tummy and dont want to eat. BUT yesterday... man that little pastry cake was calling me! Evil little thing! I had a half of a half of a cheese steak! Eeep! so bad! 'sigh' and Popcorn later on in the evening. I dont know WHAT was up with me and the snacking and bad food choices. Needless to say I am going BACK to the BASICS! Today will be my liquid day with my protein shakes and if I get ravenous ... a protein bar will be allowed along with soup or something liquidy. Gotta get back on track! It is going to be 85 degrees today supposedly here in DE and MAN is that a wake up call that summer is comming and I need to loose more for my vacation at the shore or what! Is there anyone out there that still has 50+ to loose that had surgery in March? I swear I feel like I am the only one! Ok enough wining! Elizabeth M

Oh NO Elizabeth you are not the only one. I still have 50 pounds to go as well. I have been stalled at 204 for ever it seems like. Doc says its because I am not eating enough. Thats why my body is holding on to what it needs. So I am trying to up the protein & water intkae & less coffee. Thats my downfall. I can't seem to give up the coffee. That scale just doesn't want to go below the 200 lbs mark. I get close then bam it goes back up. I no how you feel thought I am fighting with PMS rigth now & anything chocolate doesn't stay away right now. Normal times I can pass it up, but not right now. I have been grazing a lot this last couple of day myself. SO try & not beat yourself up & just get back to the good stuff today. Thats what I am trying to do as well. Its my only day off this week, so we'll se how it goes. Marilyn, the Bearlady

Thanks Marilyn! I know I am stuck at 219. Just plain ol' stuck. SO I know my body needs something drastic so I am really cracking down on the liquids... So far so good... my mind is screamin at me though and time is sllloowwwlllyyy passing. I already cannot wait till lunch so I can have my shake and my soup! sheesh the mind games our brains play on us! The warm weather is really starting to affect me. I am so thankful I am not where I was last year! But I am soooo tired of "wishing" I was at a comfortable weight each summer. This will be the LAST summer of wishing! (although I'm sure I will be wishing for plastics ) but at least I wont be wishing about loosing more weight! What a relief that will finally be!!! I have been lounging in the sun and trying to stay out of the kitchen...as soon as I sit in front of that tv those bad habits kick in! If I could just break that tv muching habit I think I will do so much better! Hang in there we will break that 200 pound mark yet! Elizabeth M

Hey there Elizabeth.... Keep your chin up..... You're doing exactly the right thing. You fell down and you picked yourself right back up instead of staying on the ground and giving up. Let's face it, it took us years to get to the point of needing WLS, why should we think that we will break all of our bad habits in one little year??!! I know where you are coming from with that dreaded 200 lb. barrier...... I keep getting tantalizingly close.... as low as 202 and I seem to bounce back as if I hit an invisible force field from some bad Sci-Fi movie!! Next thing I know, it's back to 206.....AAAAARRRRGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! I was doing really well avoiding the snack monster for a few days when out of nowhere, I had a crazy night at work and found myself at the snack machine down the hall from my office! Not only did I fall victim to the dreaded pretzel urge, but I bought a bag of freakin M&Ms??!!! I normally don't even have a particular lust for candy......WHAT THE HELL IS UP WITH THAT????!!!! I've been avoiding keeping change in my pocket, so idiot me feeds dollar bills to the monster....DUUHHH!! Oh well..... just got to carry on. Keep the faith, Elizabeth, and keep posting...... you're not alone. We'll all achieve our goals if we fight the fight together!!! Mike

Thanks Mike! Oh boy do I know what you mean about grabbing a bag of m&ms or some sort of chocolate... for me it was those new take 5 bars!!! sheesh!!! Ate the whole bar and didnt feel even a little bit queasy! Just want to kick myself everytime I have something bad. So far today has gone alright...although I think I had too many crackers with my soup...as the soup wasnt very good... it was curried carrot. ????? never heard of it before and it wasnt that great! BUT its better than having a piece of the entemans CHEESE danish sitting in front of the printer!!! ARGH!!! It was rasberry entemans yesterday THOSE ARE MY FAVORITE!!! ugh. BUT I resisted. I thought I was going to hyperventilate from the urge to have a piece!!! LOL! it sucks that food still has that much of a hold on me. BUT I am proud that I resisted. I am determined to get this weight loss started again! We can do it!!! Hang in there! No more feeding that evil snack machine!!! Elizabeth M

Elizabeth - I should be in bed right now so forgive me if I make little sense because what I'm going to try to relate might get muddled with my fuzzy thinking. I see you posting here about having bad days here and there and how you are going to get back to basics. One thing that strikes me is that you seem to have the same desperation we likely have all had at one time or another while dieting. Sounds like me for years and years and years, honestly. That old "I ate a bite of this and a bite of that and boy did I blow it big time so now I AM REALLY ON THE WAGON AND I'M GOING TO BEAT THIS THING..." I don't know if it's the right thing or the wrong thing, but I'm wondering if you feel that this is the same ol' same ol' for you if maybe shaking it up a bit might work a little better for you. You know that definition of crazy - doing the same exact thing and expecting different results, right? Well, maybe if you tried doing something like an opposite of what you are doing. No, by that I don't mean eat everything in sight, but what I mean is maybe to focus not on any specific food being off limits but more on aiming for not going nutso when you do have something normally on your "forbidden" list. I know I would have lost more by now and would still be losing more every month if I was strict on low-carb. I know this but I know if I tried to do this I would do the old seesaw eventually and fall off the wagon hard. So instead I just focus on living my day to day life and let the chips (or pounds) fall where they may for now. Might NOT be a good attitude to have (I'm still experimenting myself anyway yanno), but I have found that this easy going attitude still nets me a few pounds a month. Some days I end up not wanting to eat much at all....I lose weight then....not usually the rest of the time. So what I find is that when I eat whatever the family is having and don't sweat the rest, I will have a day where I am not really interested. I haven't created a reason to crave something, after all. So on those days I just drink protein drinks and go really light on food. Then I lose a little. Like I said, I dunno if this is good or bad, but I'm thinking maybe that you need to turn that apple cart on it's ear for now and try to see if you can not obsess on what you are eating or not eating so much....then let those non-hungry days happen when they happen. Does that make any sense at all? Take care - still in your rooting section! Dina, your ever-faithful "twin"

yep thats always been me... mess up start again.. mess up start again... Girl you are reading my mind! I swear I was just thinking...Man are these old habits or what...I post the same darn thing every time! People are going to start to see my stupid posts and habits of failing and starting again and saying im going to do something and fail and start again. Well some days I do well! but... Yeah my goal is to be able to just get use to eating healthy period and nix the "dieting" Hopefully one day I will be there. Im in that "panic its summertime hurry and loose" frame of mind which I shouldn't be in. And was always in this time of year for many many fat years. Its the old way of thinking...still hard to shake them old bad habits. You'll probably see me failing and starting and failing and starting for awhile yet. One day hopefully I will be where I can just choose only the good foods for me and be over the bad choices. If I do choose bad it will be just a small bad choice not followed by a 2nd bad choice that same day etc... Actually today I am proud of myself. I am still in my "diet phase" but like you said relaxed a little and nixed the liquid/mush foods for half a banana and a tablespoon of peanut butter for breakfast. I knew that later I would be sooo hungry because of depraving myself from something solid so I got something healthy! I also replaced the cream in my decaf coffee with milk instead! Which is good One day I will work on getting the skim milk in... but Blech! I still hate the taste of skim milk. I go to an extreme first then relax a little...which are old mind habits comming back to haunt me. I will get a hold of things. Its definitely going to take me awhile though.

we all have those days...yesterday for dinner I had part of a cheese quesadillas and a couple of fork fulls of my daughter's "Dark Side of the Moon" cake. It still pales in comparison to what I would have eaten before WLS. Like anything else....some days are better than others....hang in there! Joan