Musings on Maintaining

So, I've been eating. Yet I haven't gained weight. What's up with that? As you well know by now, I live on a need-to-know basis of understanding - if I don't get it, I don't do it well. If I don't understand how a toilet flushes, I'm gonna have a damned difficult time flushing the thing. I gotta make sense of success before I can be successful. So, I've been eating yet I have (by the Grace of God) maintained my weight loss, up a few pounds here, then it's gone in a day or two. I've stayed in the mid-140s for the past two years. I truly think it's a matter of knowing what your own reserve of personal energy is and then giving it all away in balanced increments - house, kids, significant other, self, job/career, community, miscellaneous. Here's my understanding of what I'm doing "right" -- before surgery, I could barely walk - literally, I was only able to take a few steps before I had to sit down and catch my breath. No matter the store of personal energy, there's not much that can be done with it if you can't even move from one room to another. It was all I could do to manage folding the clothes that, of course, someone had to bring to me because Lord Knows I couldn't manage bending over to dig them out of the dryer, let alone hoisting the hamper to the sofa. This is no longer the case. So, now that I am able to move - and live - I have become very connected with what is meaningful to me, and I spend my days divying out my reserve of personal energy to those things: house, kids, husband, self, career, community and, yes, miscellaneous. This leaves me very little time to obssess about food! I eat - yes, I eat - but I'm not obssessing about eating (for the most part); I am reserving the time and energy it took to obssess about food for the people, places, and things that mean the most to me. I am living Passionately, even in the face of the boring routine of everydayness; I am living truthfully, holding myself to a new standard of relating to Self and Others. This is the true TOOL for success, my friends. Know what you're made of and Give Yourself Away!! Hope this makes sense, would love to get a good thread going on this. We're much too quiet. Love and hugs, Your Reenie

Hey Reenie, I'm Still here & I only wish I had your encourement these days. I don't. Yes, I am also still better off than when I was 360+ pounds, however, I don't want to be in San Diego & feel just a little stuck at the moment & don't have a clue how to get out of this situation. I can't leave Mom at this point & don't have any friends here & very much miss my dogs. So I just putter along, go to the job that I have,Walk just about everyday on my lunch hour in La Jolla (could be worse places to walk), take care of Mom & come home & yes, eat & sometimes sleep, (not very well). Yup, You guessed it, this a little on the down side of life this week. Blame it on the Full Moon Week, I guess. Just want to scream, but, no one would here me anyway. Around, Around Around the mullberry bush, Yes, I think I have finaaly Cracked up!! Good thing My boss re-filled my Paxil today!!(hee-hee) Just think how far down I might get without them. Talk at you later from lonely San Diego, Good thing I am going to AZ in a few weeks. Me thinks I need some adventure in my Life!! Love YOu Marilyn, the Bearlady