Divorce rate...

Jen Right on, sister. I was thinking about this post last night and not sure if I should respond since I'm not going through this journey as a married person. You said it all and you said it well. You're my hero! Hugs, Connie

I agree with you one thousand percent. I'm not in this boat, since I'm single, but I feel so bad for the people going through it. The most precious gift we've ever been given is our health, and being overweight threatens that. With the weight loss, changes occur...and it's a shame when partners aren't equpped to handle that. I was in a wonderfully comprehensive program for my wls, and perhaps it wasn't part of my eval because I'm single, but I would hope that all the programs that prepare people for this surgery would include some kind of marriage counseling. Hang in there folks...remember...what happens, happens for the best. Joan

I knew I wasnt the only one going through this. My hubbys idea of a fun time is watching a movie. I just cant sit and do things like that anymore, we are not getting along well at all either, Im sure alot of it has to do with my new girlfriend also as to the fact that we are together about 75% of the day now and some nights. I just can****ch my life go by as i did for so many years. LaRhonda

YIKES! This topic scares the crap outta me! My hubby and I are struggling, well at least I am struggling and he seems to not even notice. I have made some really BAD choices in the past and I am trying to remember what it was about my husband that attracted me to him, what those things were and focusing on them. I was a size 18 when we got married and now am size 8/10 so I am smaller than he has known me and I am trying to be FUN and flirtatious with it as too rekindle some of that "newness" but his attitude is we are married we don't need to flirt anymore@ ok...but I am a flirty person and I enjoy it! So either he understands and plays along or it becomes the tip of the iceberg of other problems. He isn't jealous at all, since he loves me regardless he doesn't view anything as a threat. Which is great and frusterating at the same time, I need him to know/understand that if he doesn't give 100% to our relationship and our family that their are others who would be willing to do that. THAT I AM WORTH! 100% of his love/attention. HE is worth that from me as well. It is a struggle each day! hang in there! Nic 291-165-145

I can totally relate to all of you. I was separated when I had surgery (and had been for 1.5 years). I did have some doubts about things when we moved back in together in August but I was hopeful. I made a lot of changes in myself while I was separated and I think my decision to have surgery was a natural progression of my personal growth. My husband made a lot of changes, too, but now I get the feeling they were little more than skin deep. I want to be treated the way I deserve and I won't settle for less. Angela

Hi there, I hope this note finds you well and healthy! The March 2004 Board needs your help. Please go to the Board and read the post, AND THE SURVEY SAYS, and PLEASE respond to it by answering the few questions. We really need to hear from you. Thank you! Maureen