Greetings

Hello everyone! Sitting home and thought gee get on the computer check out obeisty help. So here I am. My bird Paulie the african grey is a joy I"m very glad that I got him. Last night when my neighbor came home he heard her door shut stood up straight and said "Mails IN!" he makes me laugh every day. The only freaky thing is that sometimes when I am upstairs in my bedroom I hear him having conversations with himself. But, he plays two parts, a man and a woman. 1/2 the time I can not understand what he is saying but he sounds exactly like people not like a bird mimicing a person. so it can be odd to hear a conversation like that. the rest of my little family is adjusting well to the new member. work continues to be stressful. one of the big reasons why i've not gottenon line that much. i' mtoo tired. i go into work very early and i stay late.i still can't get everythign done. finally i talked with my bosses and not only are they getting me an assistant but they are also goign to redesign my territory. both good things. while i lose a good amount of sales money i will be able to build my territory up again. i had had to have this done 3 years ago well i went and over sold again so now they ahve to redesign it will give me the chance to just go ahead and sell too much again! makes me happy to be busy i just need to do what i'm paid to do that is to make money. if i am trapped in the office doing paper work i am not makign money for my customers for my company or for me. hoepfully it will all take place the beginnig of may. where did april go??? we are now over 3 years working on year number 4. i can eat almost everything but stay away from most things. i've maintained at 167 but its creeping upwards and i DON' TLIKE IT. having issues to get it lower. working extremely hard to maintain. i'm feeling the old food pulls. i bought a box of sugar free snack well cookies and ate almost the whole dam box in one day. i realize its all stress related but could not stop. i threw away the remaining while i had one in my mouth an another in my hand. it is a addiction that is returning. one that i am aware of and am working at controling. it is my addiction. why is it coming back? it was laying dormat for all this time and now in my brain i can feel the burning feelings to eat even when i am not hungry. its only now aftr 3 years that they are here again? why? i do not understand that. what did the surgery do for all this time that has healed? is there medication we can take? do we go back in for a fixer upper? my head, my brain didn't have these feelings for food for a long time. one thing that is different is before i just acted i didt' nkow why i didn't stop i just ate and ate. now i can tell i can feel those thoughts that are eat eat eat cookies cookies cookies and i have to work so veryhard to keep away from the things that wil lput that weight back on. i continue to go to work out each morning i'mhopeful that with the good weather i'll be able to start my walking at night too. i certianly shoudl be out there this week but work being so stressful and nasty i've usually come home and veg. is anyone else fighting these thoughts of food? does any of this make sense? i think this is the thoughts of an addict with food being the addiction. yes i do know that it is a battle for all of us. i will continue to fight this. i guess all this ranting was just that ranting and wondering if i was alone with these thoughts. other than that i'm feeling pretty good! i want the scale to go down. am working at that fighting the food addiction.

how about a bird telling the cable man to "come in" and you aren't dressed??? happened to a friend of mine! ours can mimic each other also and soemtimes you can't tell who is "talking" ! food addiction-yea-still have it- no words of wisdom pam....just try to keep busy!!!!!!!!!!

Pam, you are not alone. Can you get yourself to any of the Middlesex SG meetings? This last one on Monday night was super; a huge crowd of pre- and post-ops, very good exchange of information and ideas, high energy. I was hopeful to see you there. I would point directly to your isolation as mainly responsible for those food thoughts returning with such power. You've got to get out and interact with people who understand where you've come from, where you're at, where you're going. You're a fighter - but don't go it alone. That's the best advice I can think to give; otherwise, I just want to say hugs to you. M.