Caution: Whining and Profanity

I'm in mourning. I really worked out hard on Saturday. On Sunday I painted house trim, hauled stuff to the curb for large trash pick up day, mowed, trimmed trees, cleaned the garage, raked, swept the driveway and more. Today I worked 10 hours and had two tough workouts so I was beat. I soaked in a hot tub until I was prune like and then climbed out. It was then that I remembered to rinse my hair. Crap! I took the lazy way out and just rinsed my hair in the sink. As I was bending over, I realized that my boobs looked like something out of a National Geographic issue - Saggy Boobs of the Maori. Oh my gawd. These are some sad ass tits. I knew they were deflated, but come on! This is cartoon-like. Having whined about it now, I still have to say that I'd gladly put up with my saggy boobs than be miserably overweight. I just have to remember that if I ever find another boyfriend, I may want to make sure that he's head over heels in love with me before I assume the top position during sex. Concave Connie

Connie..I know your upset about the boob issue, but I have to admit, I was sitting here laughing....because I can certainly relate. My boobs are a thing of the past. My ripe melons have turned to prunes...so I bought a WonderBra and at least they look decent when I'm wearing clothes. God help me when I have to get naked in front of a man..... Joan

Here's the lovely tune constantly playing in my head these days... Do your boobs hang low, do they wobble to and fro? Can you tie 'em in a knot, can you tie 'em in a bow? Can you throw them over your shoulder like a rifle-bearing soldier? Do your boobs hang low? 'course, it looses its meaning if you don't know the melody. Then there's the tummy...downright disgusting. I'd hate to think of what the lyrics will be for that. Hang in there, sweetie -- get it??? Reenie

Reenie, that was helarious!! You and Connie sure know how to deal with the side effects of this surgery with great humor. I do know the tune to that song and now it is going to be stuck in my head all day! My breast are still of decent size and not completely flat yet but I still have thirty lbs to lose so theres still time My husband is the biggest worrier about the shrinkage of my breasts, if it weren't for him, I wouldn't even think twice about them, all I can say is thank goodness for great bras, men who love us anyway and making love in the dark!! Good luck the next time you have to bring the "girls" out to meet your quest Dawn

OMG you have me laughing this morning!!!! I say mine are like 2 tube socks with rocks in them. It is a sad state `Nicole

God, I love it when you talk dirty Connie!!!!!! LOL At first I thought that I better not touch this one, but I couldn't let that vision of the "Saggy Boobs of the Maori" article in Geographic go by without comment......BRILLIANT!!!!!!!!! I can't even look at the words printed on the screen without chuckling. But seriously folks....look at the bright side....saggy or not, at least boobs are part of your standard equipment. What's my excuse??!!! They don't sell bras with my size rib cage in mind. I lean over with my shirt off and it looks like a scene from the primate house at the zoo! At least maybe all of this #&*@% snow that I'm shoveling lately might help tighten things up a bit. One can only hope! As for the boyfriend thing...If the guys out your way have any brains, they'll be beating one another bloody to be first in line. Mike

I can vouch that what Mike has said is true. I have the hanging udders and have laughed to myself about them.. Without getting too graphic, I have a new man in my life and was comfortable enough with him that I showed him and laughed. He did not laugh, but did tell me, it did not matter to him. This was one area that I was concerned about when I met someone and started a new relationship. Before we became intimate, we had a discussion about my weight loss, the wrinkles and my insecurity in that area. He has been a great asset in releiving me of that insecurity and oh what a relief it is. So ladies, I have found out so far, if they care, it will not matter.

Well How about going downstairs with no bra on and your kid asks why are you clapping mom Little does he know I am clapping on the inside It sure is nice to have someone to share our fun and not so fun times with. Diana

Connie, Still waiting on the profanity!! Anyway...I can say when it's "cold" my girls are high and tight...just don't ask me to pick anything up off the floor...cause that scene ain't pretty!!! DH would love for me to get them 'resized'...but with my Lupus it's not worth the antibody reaction I'd have to the implants!! So 'my girls' are staying as is... Va

Connie and all you say it sooooooo well! National Geographic, I never thought of putting it that way! National Geographic Head Quarters must be here in Golden Valley, you know I wonder how they got all those pics of me and it really tics me off that they put all those other womens heads on my body!!!