All alone.

Shannon, I am so sorry to hear this. I will keep you in my prayers. Leslie P

I am so sorry to hear about what you are going through. Perhaps she is just feeling a little insecure because you're looking so good? Maybe you can get some help and patch it all up? I'm praying for that. If not, don't ever think of trading that weight loss....it's a matter of your own health. Your body is the most precious thing you have, and if people don't understand the importance of keeping it healthy, then they aren't for you. I heard a story the other day about a guy who had the surgery and left his wife because she was "too fat." She then had the surgery, is looking fabulous and now he wants her back. She told him no. It does change things, but we want to hope it's always for the better (usually it is for the better, rough patches and all). My thoughts and prayers are with you....Joan

Oh, Shannon, I'm so sorry. When we are enmeshed in the kind of emotional pain you are having to deal with right now, it is very difficult to stay focused on your incredible accomplishments and to feel proud and happy about it. Let us do that for you right now; you do what you need to do to heal and move forward. We'll keep reminding you every step of the way -- we are so proud of you; we are so happy that you have been giving your life back. If it's any consolation, my marriage is in serious trouble as well. There is great love between us, we just can't figure out how to behave together any more...so we don't. We stay away from each other as much as possible these days. In fact, this morning marked a milestone in our 18 year marraige -- it was the first time ever that Jim left the house for work without saying good-bye. He just left. And took my broken heart with him. Good luck, my friend. We must believe it can only get better, with or without the people we have always believed loved us best. Take care, and stay in touch. Maureen

Shannon, First of all I would like to say that I am so sorry that you are going through this. I will be lifting you up in prayer. I also will say that this is a trying time for all of us. I have what I would describe as a rock solid marriage. I have had to deal with my fair share of problems and not so long ago felt as if my marriage was going to be over. There are so many things that we dealt with in the past with food. Now that we can't deal with food we have to find new ways to cope. Sometimes it is those very changes that seem to shake the foundation of our relationships. I do hope that if there is someway to save your marriage. This is the hard part the emotional work that follows the loss of weight. Like Va, my husband is 13 years older than I an I have had to hear at times that I will probably find someone younger and in better shape. I know that the good Lord will see you through this. Please keep in touch with us on the board and we will do our best to support you in what ever way we can. Take care of yourself, don't forget your vitimins, water, and protein. We are all just an e-mail away. Shannon The Irish Lassie 266/158/140

Shannon, I am very sorry that you are going through this problem in your marriage. My husband and I separated 3 months after my surgery. It was alot of things going back a long time before the surgery, but I do not believe it would have happened except for the way I was feeling after the surgery--stronger, enabled, attractive. I think the partners of wls patients are either delighted and very supportive or threatened by no longer having that "one up" on us because we are the fat ones. I hope in your case you can work out the problems if that is what you want. Just don't say you would want to give up your better health for the marriage. No one who loves you would want you to do that. Hugs, Dorothy