I need a shrink!

Sally, I understand your frustration with the hospital. I stayed in one of the nicest, poshest hospitals in my state and felt a little robbed. It started in recovery when I woke up in the worst pain of my life. I kept telling the nurse that I was in pain and she kept telling me to push the button. I was, but it wasn't helping. I was in recovery for 2 hours, fully awake and kept telling that woman that I was getting no relief from pain. Her answer was that I was just sensitive. Hell, I've had every cavity in my mouth filled with no novocaine, no gas. Sensitive my butt. When I finally got to my room, I told the nurse assigned to me that I was really hurting and the morphine pump wasn't working. She gave me a shot that solved the problem and then found that my PCA pump was never connected to my IV correctly. I'd come out of surgery and spent the last 2 hours on no pain management whatsoever. I would have gotten my walking in by hunting down that recovery nurse and kicking her butt if they had let me. Even though the doctor has a suite of spacious private rooms assigned for her patients, I was the last surgery of the day and given a tiny room in the corner. Sure it was private, but you couldn't have squeezed an extra fart in that room. The recliner was wedged between the bed and the sink so you couldn't get to the sink, paper towels, etc. There was no room for the flowers that friends and family sent or for more than one visitor at a time and they had to stand or lay on the bed. My sister and her family came to visit and they had to keep rotating with one in the room and the other three in the bathroom. lol I didn't get a nice recliner like everyone else. I got this funky chair that you had to pull a footrest out from the bottom, sort of like a trundle bed. Every time I wanted to get up or sit down, I had to be hauling this heavy foot rest in and out. I felt stupid calling the nurses every time so started doing it myself. That's how I ripped open my incision. After grousing over this for a day, here is what I decided... So what. I'm on my way to a very healthy, long life. I now have a party story to tell and in 2 years I won't remember anything other than being in the hospital and the good experiences that I had. Most of the nurses were stupendous, my surgeon was just wonderful. I tend to forget the negative. You're not crazy, Sally. Just make a decision to focus on the future and the wonderful way you're going to look and feel soon. Connie

Thanks so much for your story. I knew by putting my problem out on these boards that it would heal me and it has helped so much. Sometimes just assuming that everyone but YOU has had it better is nuts! I think back now to my hysterectomy in 1981 and realize that I had the best of the best. Great hospital, huge private room next to the waiting area, stayed in the hospital 8 days and played cards with my friends....those were the days when they didn't send you home until you FELT well!

I am so sorry you are having such a hard time. No one think that the hospital stay will be the worst part of the whole thing. But you survived and now are on the great road to recovery. This first week will be the hardest for you. You will start to feel better everyday and then this will be a distant memory to you. You just keep venting to us and hopefully we can help you make it through this. (((((((((((hugs))))))))))) LaDonna -22

I think unpleasant hospital stays, for one reason or another, are more the norm than the exception these days. I've spoken with a couple of people that have had this surgery with the same surgeon that I'm using. They all rave about the surgeon but hated their time in the hospital. Supposedly, all the bariatric patients get private rooms but I gues there were other problems with insensitive nurses. Also, because it's the University of Washington, a lot of doctors (other than your own) come around and visit you as part of their educational process. It will be interesting to see what my experience is. Caboose

I had visiting surgeons watch surgery, and go on rounds with my surgeon, and I approved that.,...and there were very eager medical students running all around testing the laser gun that reads armbands...LOL they were so cute. If I had just had a roomie like myself we would have talked together and made the situation fine...just luck of the draw. Although in listening to how the nurses treated her...I did see a huge difference in attitude, Only one nurse was great...and when we complimented her this is what she said: "You have to love what you do. I went in to nursing because I love it not to make money." or something like that but you get the drift...she was an older woman and just super...and here is a thought too: Some of the nurses not so nice were very very heavy.....hmmmmmmmm?

Hi Sally, I got a preview of what my stay will be like when I went to PRMC on Thursday for my filter. There is a wonderful hallway and long window to stroll along, BUT .................. the rooms BARELY hold 2 beds and two straight chairs, with no room to move around at all. I didn't see the private room up close, but it looks like it is half the size of the double. The good news is that the floor nurses I met on Thursday were just wonderful. I didn't see any sign of 'recliners' .. unless they roll out the bed and roll in the recliner if you need it. I am glad I got a preview tho, because now I am prepared to make the best of it. The post ops in Dr S's support group say 5 West is a great ward, so I am going to have faith that I will not be disappointed. Hugs, Mo doin' the OMG tomorrow's the day happy Mo dance

Oh Sally, I feel for you! I, too, had a really sick, needy roommate who was very intrusive on my peaceful, resting, healing time. She was hooked up to about ten machines - one or another of which beeped for fifteen minutes at a time at all hours of the day and night. I guess she was passed out, so most of the time I had to be the one to call for a nurse for her to come check whatever was beeping. At one point I broke down and cried to a nurse. I just told her it was too much!! I couldn't get any rest and I was very anxious and upset! I also had the lame corridors to walk down with no view and nothing interesting to see. I didn't think about asking for a private room either! I guess I didn't know it was an option. No one ever offered me the option. I told my boyfriend today that I know I'm going to look back on March as a very hazy, unreal, dreamlike time. I have a bad cold right now, so I feel extra messed up. I just feel like I went into this alternate reality when I went in for surgery and that I haven't been able to really leave it yet. It's like I see my real life around me, but I can't really live there yet. I don't know. I'm rambling. I just wanted to tell you that I really relate and I'm sorry. I know things will get better before long, but that doesn't help NOW, does it? Love, Eve

Wow, sorry to hear about these horror stories. I wont embelish on my hospital stay, but suffice it to say... It was good. I was suprised when I woke up in a private room.

I totally agree that you should put pressure on your surgeon and be very vocal about this hospital experience, especially if there is a hospital support group. My hospital experience was mixed, i.e., the ward was great but the pain relief was not as advertized and I have made sure that is known at the highest level in a way they cannot dismiss. The needs of bariatric patients are as unique as those of maternity patients. Here's what a bariatric ward should be like and it's a good thing to ask about when making initial inquiries: 1. The gowns are for bariatric patients, i.e., they are larger. 2. If the hospital must combine the ward with another for economic reasons, suggest orthopedic patients. They are not that sick (though I still had an elderly guy screaming out all night across from me, oh well). 3. A specialized ward tends to insure more that nurses and aides want to work with bariatric patients and any prejudice they emit will be against the mission of the ward and dealt with. 4. As many private rooms as possible. You lived that one. For some reason, my room did not cost anything extra. I'm not sure how that was achieved. The best way for your surgeon to prove this is with an economica study that shows the hospital what a gold mine providing good bariatric care can be. I think my hospital, which is not so good, is staging a big comeback based on this program. BTW, I have a therapist for all this because, hey, life is unpredictable and this is a big change to make. She specializes in helping those who have had this surgery and I got her from my surgeon. But of course that doesn't stop me from the pleasure of venting here! I hope you are feeling better. It takes a couple of weeks at least to get all the glitches out. Gano

Sally, You know , it sounds to me like you almost feel guilty for your own thoughts! I don't think you are mean at all. You have a right to your opinion and if you weren't feeling well "of course you don't want to hear other people not feeling well either." The pediatric unit???? OMG......that's terrible! I think you're perfectly normal when it comes to the thinking process and feelings. I myself would be depressed if they did this to me! I do think it was wrong to make you or anyone share a room with someone that sick. That person should of been in a private room. I think you developed what is called "fear" of this happening AGAIN and that is totally normal. You may even have what's called PTS, Post tramatic syndrome..........I know some will say "that only occurs with more serious situations" but in reality it occurs to people differently in how they interpret their situations. I encourage you to see a shrink if "you" feel it's necessary. Nothing wrong with it. I've had problems in the past where I've had to and it seemed so minut to others but inmy mind it was magnified! I wish you the best!