You've Gotten Away From Me...

As is evident from other posters, life has become extremely complicated and for me, pretty damn near unmanageable most days. Was it like this pre-surgery? How did I ever manage all of it at my super-morbidly obese weight? I honestly don't remember. All I know is that I am barely treading water these days trying to put the fires out, keep sane, and keep our family intact and managing on a daily basis. This morning, I had to leave for work with one of our horses on the ground and unwilling -- or unable -- to get up. I don't know what I'll find when I return this afternoon, having to leave the office and cancel important meetings in order to meet the vet. This may seem like a small thing but it's one of a series of other emergencies and crises that I am faced with every day. Life is rediculously difficult. And I can't understand if it's always been this way or if it's new to our cir****tances. At any rate, I miss you all and have been thinking of you every day. I hope you are managing better than I. Sometimes, don't you just want to lay down, pull the covers up over your head and make it all go away? Take care, love, Maureen

Reenie, I'm sorry to hear about your horse. I certainly hope it is a case of unwilling as opposed to not able. I worry every day when I leave the house that I will come home and find one of our cats ill or worse dead. We have two 'aged' cats (they will be 16 in September) and next week when we leave for 12 days in the motorhome they will be coming with us for the first time because I am unwilling to leave them in someone else's care. In recent months I have had to leave work to rush home to take an animal for an emergency visit to the vet, so I can completely sympathize. I don't remember life being so complicated pre WLS, but then I think I was numbed out by food and my weight. Hang in there, we are all here for you. Hugs, Mo

Yup, I agree. The most frustrating thing right now is I bought a new computer & it took me 2 days to get into this group & find you all. I DID IT!!. But wow what a frustrating experience. Now I just hope I can get back into it again. We will see!! Reenie, Sorry about the Horse, but, Hopefully your life will calm down & you can get some piece of mind out of the weight loss you have accomplished. I do think we were dealing with all this stuff before surgery, just handled it with food instead of other outlets. Hang Tough my friend. Marilyn, the Bearlady

Wow, Reenie. I can certainly relate to all the chaos. I don't ever remember my life being as complicated as it is today, but then again I'm having some pretty big life changes going on right now. Unfortunately I'm comforting my self with food. I baked a pan of brownies the other night and commenced to basically using that pan as a feeding bag over the following 3 days. My soon to be ex isn't even around, so I can't blame him for the "missing" brownies. I'm looking to food to comfort me, but it's not helping. I wish I would get that through my thick head and stop the madness. I know it would be best if I went out and excercised - just going for a walk. But now that I'm a single mom, I just don't know how I will ever find the time for me again. I'm not one to ask for help - or accept it, so I'm stubborn enough to attempt to manage on my own. So, yes - I can completely understand wanting to pull the covers up over my head and making it all go away. Some days I'm not even sure how I get out of bed. I suppose my daughters are the reason I keep going. I have to. Thank God for them. Thank God for all of you, too. I know that no matter what time - day or night - I have y'all to turn to. Group hug! -Wendy

Maureen, I hope all is well with the horse. I think life was always this complicated, but we just stayed in bed and pulled the covers over our heads when we weren't eating. It's amazing how much life is going on around us when we pull our heads out of the sand. Unfortunately, it isn't always as happy as we would like it to be. The up side is that with our heads out of the sand, we also get to see the good parts that passed us by before. I have a hard time sorting out what really needs to be addressed as opposed to what Connie's neuroses wants addresed. I'm my own worst enemy and totally overwhelm myself when I don't stand back and take a breath. I have to sort through and decide what really needs attention and what doesn't. The broken window needs to be addressed, the dust in the library doesn't ****il the dust bunnies get large enough to engulf a cat). My mantra is "bite size chunks." I just keep reminding myself that I have to take life in manageable pieces or it's going to overwhelm me. It's a daily battle. Love ya, Connie

What happened with your horse? I can sure relate to wanting to pull up the covers and hide! Hang in there, Sis! Joy