Anniversary of my Re-birth
Last year at this time, I was in the hospital waiting to be taken into the operating room. All the anxiety I had about wondering if I am doing the wrong thing, for me had dissipated. I was ready to take my life into my own hands for the first time in the 30 years I was on this earth.
From the time I was 9, I was always considered fat, chubby, chucky, the big girl. I wanted to be seen as more than just a pretty face... more than just the "mature and responsible" girl. I wanted to feel good about myself, and be happy with what I see in the mirror. I wanted my inner beauty to be reflected on the outside. But more than anything in my life, I wanted to be heard, listened to, and not ignored.
Today, exactly one year to the day, I am a completely different person on the outside. Now instead of people staring at me in disgust, they are staring in admiration. Instead of being the inspiration of what NOT to eat, I am the inspiration of what to eat and how to live.
For the first time in my life, I have control over my body. I can control if I lose weight or if I gain. I am no longer a prisoner in my own body. In one short year, my entire life has changed. I no longer carry the burden of two people... but only one. And while, I will always see and consider myself morbidly obese, now I can say I am a recovering from obesity. My cancer is in remission, and hopefully I will become stable enough that I can write cured over my heart.
In Islam, they say that the way you look at 31 is the way you will look in paradise. I am glad that I can spend eternity in a body that I am comfortable in.
Today is my day for reflection. Today is my day to remember where I have come from and where I have left to go. To all pre-ops, this is a day you will remember for the rest of your lives. For all post-ops this is an anniversary we never forget. The day we took back control over our lives.
Thanks for listening...
Keisha
Most Active
Recent Topics
