DOES ANYONE ELSE HAVE PROBLEM WITH FAMILY SUPPORT?

Many of my family members see my choice to have lap band surgery as a quick fix, an easy way out, and consider this an "elective surgery" on my part. I even had my mother the other day tell me that all I ever talk about is my weight loss journey, my eating habits, how much I exercise, and what is left to do before my surgery. I was very upset and hurt that she could not understand that my obesity has been the core problem for me since I was a young child. I have struggled with obesity my whole life. I was diagnosed with high cholesterol, high bp, and pre-diabetes back in June 07, which prompted me to consider surgical intervention. Although my levels are all down, I am still on all the medication for the hypertension, the cholesterol, and the pre-diabetes. I feel like the only people who are truly understanding are people who either have gone through the WLS journey, who are currently going through it, or who plan to go through it. Noone else really "gets it". And it hurts me that when I try to educate family members about the lap band procedure, they just don't want to hear about it. They say I talk about it too much, that it's all I ever talk about lately. Well this is a huge part of my life, and it has been since I began my journey of weight loss and surgery prep over 6 months ago. I am excited about this; about my future; about being healthy and happy and productive. I want them to be excited for me; I want their support and understanding. So many people (not just family members) think they know all there is to know about WLS and they don't. The information is out there. I would talk to ANYONE who ever had any questions about my journey. I enjoy talking about it, especially with people going through it or who have gone through it. And people who are just beginning the process of considering surgery. That is why I would like to make new friends on here, because I am saddened by the lack of true support from my family. This is my life I am trying to save. This is my future. This is for me, and for my daughter. I do feel this is the best decision I have ever made in my life. I truly believe that if I hadn't begun to change my life nutritionally, emotionally, and physically, nearly 7 months ago, then I could be dead by now or close to it. I had to change everything about my life, my eating habits, my exercise habits (or lack thereof), my mindset, my objectives in life. A total evaluation of my life and what I want out of it. Bottum line is I don't want to die. I want to live. I choose life. That is why I have chosen the WLS lap band. Seeking OH friends......email me anytime. I would love to hear about your journeys. All of you inspire and educate me. Thank you. Doirinne from Cohoes, NY

Doirinne, I can't say that I don't have any family support because my husband, kids and my Mother are all very supportive of my decision to have WLS. BUT...I have chosen not tell anyone else in my family...not yet. They all want me to lose weight but I'm pretty sure they will all think my decision is too drastic. I am having the Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy on Feb. 15, 2008. Everyone in my family struggles with their weight but I am the only one who is classified as obese. My Mother is on the higher end of being "overweight" and she was "obese" not too long ago. She wishes she had the opportunity to have WLS herself. Now she see's me following in her footsteps and wants me to change direction and live a better (more healthy) life than she has. So of course, she supports me. The thing is, people get REALLY involved with stuff that is important to them at that particular time in their life. When I was pregnant all I could focus on was baby stuff. I logged onto ever baby message board I could find, I watched the Baby Story on TV everyday and I loved hearing about people who just had babies. Since my kids are getting older I don't visit those sites, I change the channel when Baby Story is on and I don't talk about my "birthing" experience anymore. Right now I am really into WLS and all I want to do is listen to people talk about their weight loss. That is what is so great about this OH forum. I don't have any local friends who are having/or have had this surgery so I can't talk to them about it. Instead I talk to people on these message boards, people who can relate to me and what I am going through. Also, if you look around on these boards you will see that the majority of the poeple on these boards are either pre-op or just had surgery a short time ago. The people who have already lost all their weight are out there enjoying their lives. They don't sit at home reading the OH mesage boards anymore. They will check in every so often and say things like "I haven't been on for a while..." I can't wait for that day. Even though I spend a great deal of time on this website now I hope that a year from now I will only check into this board "on occasion" to let people know that it was worth every penny and encourage others. The point I am trying to make is that your weight has controlled your life. It has consumed you. After you have surgery and after you lose weight it will no longer be your focus. You will be out there living, enjoying life, not thinking about how to fix your weight problem. Until then, we are here on the OH message boards getting prepared for the rest of our lives.

Doirinne, Let me just say I'm sorry that you'r family isn't supporting you that much and honestly I really do know how it feels.....I'm not going to get into that very much you can check out my page and check out my blogs you will see where I'mcoming from.....I have full support from my family not so much my daughter but she's 4 so she doesn't really know what is going on.....another thing is I haven't really ever gotten my fiance's support but he is starting to cheange his mind about things.....since Feb 11 I'm going to have the surgery done I've had my surgery cancelled 3 times because of him......So I do know where you're coming from.....If you want to know anymore please fell free to let me know and you already know you will always have support here on OH GL Angie