A strange request

My poppa broke his hip a few weeks ago. So he has to stay off it while it heals. He is 72 yrs old. Well You know them jokes that everyone forwards that sometimes are just so annoying. Well if it is a good one I print it out and once a week or so I take to poppa. Well I figure since it is summer everyone is more busy and I havent been getting any. So if you all would send me some so I can give them to poppa. My email is [email protected]. Thank you. love marie

I get a lot of them from my FIL, I NEVER forward [it's against my religion LOL], but since you asked so sweetly I'll make a note to send you the good ones;) xosm

Thank you so much!!!

HEALTH QUESTION & ANSWER SESSION Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true? A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap. Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables? A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products. Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake? A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up! Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio? A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc. Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program? A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain Is Good!!! Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you? A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!!... Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you? Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle? A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach. Q: Is chocolate bad for me? A: Are you crazy? HELLO . Cocoa beans! Another vegetable!!! It's the best feel- good food around! Q: Is swimming good for your figure? A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me. Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle? A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape! Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets. And remember: "Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming Whoo what a ride". _______________________________________________________________________ cute kittens http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b320/dawnsobers/ATT210815.jpg _______________________________________________________________________ A couple of smiles for you. Enjoy, Eleathia

Thank you I copied and printed this. You all are a great help to me. love marie

Gosh

Hey have you guys gotten the forward called "Six reasons to avoid the gym"? OMG so funny...I'm going to send it off to who's ever email I have . Elisa p.s. Marie I just noticed your email...LOL I'm going to forward you some stuff.

[email protected]

Gosh did you get the forward? Elisa

Thanks Elisa, I kinda got it. Let me explain. The inside of it had big blank boxes with a little boxed "x' inside, for all 6 items. *sigh* Oh well. Thanks for trying. Gosh PS Stricture's back grrrrrrrrr