Depression

Okay guys, I dont know where else to turn. I know I have not been around much and this topic has little to do with weight loss. But my head is spinning and I need some advice. As some of you know I have been trying to get pregnant all year and just recently found out that My tubes are blocked and I am unable to get pregnant without help. I was told that IVF was an option, but I cannot afford the $10'000.00 a shot to try to get pregnant via IVF. and with that their is no gurantee that it will work. I'm beginning to feel like my world is falling apart and their is nothing I can do about it. The on thing in life I am happy about it that my weight is stable, has not gone anywhere for the longest time, I am now wearing a size 4-6 depending on what I get. My boobs have up and vanished on me, pre-surgery I was wearing a double E cup, now I'm in a B!, my pride and joy has gone I am looking for any advice on the pregnancy front, anybody been through this or have any ideas that I can untilise? Please.. I'm just looking for some support that is not my husbands family asking me if I am pregnant yet. Thanks in advance to everyone just for making it through this post. You guys are the best! Lee

Lee, Is there any surgical procedure that can be done to unblock the tubes? It is amazing the costs involved with IVF. Have you considered adoption? There are so many children that need loving homes. Does your local hospital have any type of support groups that may be of help to you? My doctors never wanted me to get pregnant because of some major health risks for me. So having children was taken off our list of priorities. Sometimes I wish we had had children, but our lives are full with friends, family, and activities. Sending you hugs, Mary

I go to see the Dr. on Wednesday to find out where we go from here. Thanks for the support group idea, I will definatly have a look into that. THanks for your words of support, they are much appriciated! xoxox Lee

Lee, My heart breaks for you and your husband. I'm sure words just can't describe what you are going through right now. My mother-in-law lost three babies before she and my father-in-law adopted my husband (50 years ago). I can still see the hurt in her eyes to this day whenever she talks about it. But, I also see the great love she has for my husband. I can see so much happiness when she talks about the day they brought him home and when she tells me about different times throughtout his life that mean so much to her. The thought of him being adopted hardly ever enters our minds. This might not be the best time to think about adoption, but keep it in the back of your mind. From what I've seen, it is a wonderful thing.... bringing baby and parents together. The love is so strong! I wish you the best, Lee, and thank you for sharing your sorrow with us. Wanda

I have never had a miscarrage, or lost a baby.. but my heart is breaking over this. It is the only thing that is first and foremost in my mind. Adoption is somthing that my husband and I have discussed breifly, I'm not ready to give up on doing it myself yet though. however my dream of having all my kids by the time Im 30 is quickly vanishing, then again, when does life ever go to plan... Thanks for your support. xoxox Lee

Lee, I'm sorry you are having this set back. I think all of us women understand your *needing/wanting* another baby. It was so consuming for me,when I wanted my third child. BTW I had my baby girl when I was 37. It was unexpected, but what a joy. Don't cut yourself short at 30. I have a friend who had to go the invitro route and had twins at 40. What precious gifts they are. Don't give up, if it is what you want. Hugs, Debbie

Dear Lee, I can sympathize with you. One of the major reasons I had this surgery was to get pregnant. We have no children and have been married for 4 1/2 years. Well, I was on track to start trying in July. Well, with these complications I now can not do that. I can tell you that "I" am adopted and I think that is the way we are going to go. I know how loved and special I feel because I was chosen. (My dad says they picked the runt of the litter...hehe some runt at largest 326). I can't say that I understand totally because we had not started trying. My sister went thru the infertility and ended up on one of the drugs and had twins (I'm just glad it wasn't quads). You have been there and supported me and I will do all I can to support you. I am sending prayers and hugs your way! Noelle

Are you going to be able to have kids or are you going to go down the adoption road? Twins run in my family, I would be excited to have twins. However it would be just my luck to have triplets or more!?!?!?!... Thanks for your support! xoxox Lee

Lee...I wish you were here to give you a hug. so, I guess you had a histogram - isn't that where they shoot some fluid through your tubes to see that "all systems are go?" If they did not do that, what did they do or how do they know you are blocked? Have they told you that you cannot get pregnant? Is there any other surgical intervention you may pursue? Second opinion? I 'd be concerned that they are rushing you to make an IVF decision, when that method has a pretty low success rate, I think. Not to mention that it is usually not covered by insurance. In the mean time, ask your hubby to talk to his family about what's going on so they "lay off" on their pressure for a grandchild. Want me to come visit? Denise

Denise, thank you... Yip I had a Hysterosalpingogram.. They put the tube into my cervix and filled me up with dye, which was really painfull considering my tubes are blocked. They have not told me I cannot get pregnant. The Dr. who did the test on me said " oh well at least you know what the problem is and now you can move on" what an A$$... So now on Wednesday we find out what to do next.. I dont know if I want to do another surgery, but hey wthey things we do for kids.. it is cheaper than IVF. As far as my hubbies family, I sent out a bulk email to everyone in his family that said not to mention it to me anymore, when and if somthing happens we will let them know.. half of them were insulted by this email and let me know it, and the other half have left me alone.. I suppose you cannot wint hem all. Thanks for you support. xoxox Lee