Behind, Depressed, YUCK

I haven't come around the boards much since I had surgery, really, but I check in occasionally. My one-year anniversary was last week, and I feel like I'm way behind, and I'm angry with myself for allowing bad eating habits to creep back in. Out of curiousity, those of you who are still keeping up with such things, will you answer some questions for me? 1) How much are you able to eat at a meal now? 2) How many meals/snacks are you eating per day? 3) How many calories are you consuming per day, on average? Here are my answers: 1) 8 oz - sometimes more, I think, depending on the food 2) 3 meals, 2 snacks - plus grazing snacking at night! 3) around 1500, maybe more sometimes YUCK! See? It's horrible. I feel like I'm on the road to disaster, and it's SO hard getting back on-track. I was 320 lbs at surgery. I'm now 193. That's a decent enough loss, but it's behind some of the others I've seen. Julie

Julie, You have lost a tremendous amount of weight! My one year anniversary was February 11 and I have lost 80 pounds. Granted, I started at 256 but I still should have lost more than 80. You can't compare yourself to others and I try not to. You have done great! I probably eat anywhere from 8 to 12 ounces of food at each meal. Like you, I eat three meals plus 2 snacks a day. I found myself snacking in the evenings around 8 months out and that scared the hell out of me. That has always been and probably will always be my downfall. I try not to snack in the evenings now and boy is it HARD! I probably consume about 1500 calories each day. (As a side, I met with my surgeon on the 9th and asked her how much I should be able to hold and she told me that at one year, I should be able to hold 8 to 10 ounces.) Do you exercise? That really helps. It is so hard this far out! I wish you the best. Keep us posted on how you're doing. Wanda 256/178/145

Wanda, Thanks for the words of encouragement. They always do help. I have NOT been exercising like I should, and that combined with the poor eating habits are why I'm so upset. I know that I would've done better if I had only done what I was supposed to do! The portion sizes were more of a genuine concern for me - as far as, "Wow. Have I done something to really screw myself up?? Am I able to eat WAY more than I should be able to eat?" At my one-year appoitment, my surgeon said I should be eating around 6 oz per meal - maybe 8. Maybe that's just a differing opinion from surgeon to surgeon. Knowing that other say 8 to 10 makes me feel a bit better. Julie

Julie, Behind,depressed and yuck was just the way I felt until I went in for my 1 year post op visit.(at 13 months). My doctor made me feel so much better about where I was out and were I was going. He said not to look at the #, but at the % of weight you had lost. At one year the average loss is 85%. I was behind at between 77% and 78%. He had me get back on the straight and narrow with the "Rules of the Tool" and increase my exercise. He said he wanted me to sweat....meaning I would need to shower after exercising. He's a really cool doctor and won't leave any of his patients behind! I can eat 3 to 5 ounces per meal and have 6 meals per day. I'm trying to only have dense protein which is one of the "Rules of the Tool". Although, I haven't weighed since my appointment on 02/05/05...so I may have lost I'm just not sure or ready to weigh. I have gone down another size in clothes. People tell me how great I look, but in my mind I still can't see it. I still wear a pretty big size comparing myself to other on this site. I can't see myself every wearing a 6 or 8. Yes...I would very much like to but I'm only 27 lbs from goal and can't see the sizes dropping that much. I guess this is when we have to realize that we are all individuals. Anyway, you've done an amazing job and continue to keep up the good work. Try not to compare yourself to others. This has been very hard for me, also. I'm really trying to work on this problem. I keep telling my self that I have to be "me"! Becky K. WY

Becky, you'd be surprised by the sizes. Every 5-10 pounds now, I find myself dropping a size, so it's very easy to think you might get down to an 8 if you want to lose another 27 pounds. But I wouldn't worry much about the size so long as you look and feel good. Cheers, Julie

Julie, The worst thing any of us can do it compare ourselves to others. Each of us loses at a different rate. You really have done well!!!! 127 lbs is a great loss. You are way ahead of me. I'm almost 1 year out (this Friday) and have lost 77 lbs since surgery and 127 lb total as I lost 50 lbs before surgery. I currently weight 178 and am 5'1" so losing another 50 lbs would give me a normal BMI. I eat 3 meals a day and 2 snacks usually. Founding it easy to graze and working hard at getting over that. Breakfast: 1/2 protein bar, 1 small banana Lunch: 1/2 of a sandwich or straight protein or protein bar dinner: protein of some type with some type of veggie usually Snacks: protein bar (if I am low on protein for the day), SF snow cone, nuts, etc. The denser the protein, the less I can eat. I also stay fuller longer with dense protein (chicken compared to yogurt or eggs). I honestly don't count calories. I watch the protein intake as my surgeon wants it between 75 and 125 grams a day. Also try to not overdo carbs but not always successful. Mary

~ Hey there Julie! ~ I'm almost 13 months out, and I had lost about 170 pounds but gained 10 pounds on vacation. Yup, it gets worse than slow loss, it gets pretty easy to gain after a year out. This was a good wake up call for me, and I've jumped back into good habits. I can eat between 8-12 oz (depending on the food) at one time and I eat 3 meals plus 2-3 snacks every day. If I keep to around 1200 calories per day, I lose at a decent pace ( 2-5 pounds per week ). If I go above 1500 calories per day I lose nothing, and over 1800 calories I gain. I exercise every single day in one way or another. I either go to Inches Away (Curves), and/or go to an exercise class (Power Pump, Water Aerobics or Body in Balance), and/or ride my horse(s). If I don't do Inches or a class, I don't lose any weight. And, my poor knees abused from years of obesity, stiffen up and ache really bad when I don't work out. Besides exercise, I started using FitDay.com again. That is a wonderful tool for me and helps to keep me honest. I also stick with a schedule for eating and drinking, which ensures that I get the protein and fluids in that I need every day. Being so very active, I need about 100 grams of protein daily. And I get no less than 96oz of fluids, more if I get sweaty. My last tool, but one I use almost daily - is the scale at Inches. While there are different schools of thought on the daily or frequent weigh ins, my nutrionist agreed that if you use it wisely, the scale can be a good tool. For example, weighing daily isn't going to reflect an accurate weight. Things like how much I ate or drank the day before, how much salt I took in, whether my 16 yr old son raised my BP to stroke levels, whether the moon is in alignment with the stars, (you name it, it has an affect), all affect my weight on a daily basis. So, if I see a 5 pound jump UP OR DOWN, I don't get too excited, but if it's a jump UP, it helps me to stick to my healthiest routine for the next few days. And if it's a jump DOWN, it encourages me to stick with it. If it stays the same for 2 weeks, I up my fluids and protein if necessary, or kick the exercise into higher gear. I take every weigh-in with a grain of salt and just use it as a tool. Good luck to you! RUthanne

I have begun using fitday.com again, too! I honestly didn't realize how much junk was going into my mouth until I started trying to keep up with it. I know if I were to get myself on a regular exercise schedule, things would probably improve, and I would begin to lose weight again. Diligent exercising has always been a very weak point for me. There are no excuses, but I find lots of reasons not to do it. I despise exercising in the afternoons. It takes up time, and I'm always tired, so I never feel like doing it. I'm working on making myself get up early in the mornings and do it, but that's easier said than done, too. That Bellydance DVD I bought is just waiting for me to try it! ;) Another question... Did anyone else's surgeon advise you to wait 2-3 minutes between each bite of food? If so, are you still doing this, or have you found yourself not waiting? At my one-year visit, I was at around 66% of my excess weight lost. Considerably behind the average of 85%, BUT.. my surgeon did say that lots of people do better their 2nd and 3rd years out. I just have to get my butt in gear! Thanks again for all the words of encouragement and the sharing!

Julie, You are doing great!! The worst thing we can do to ourselves is to compare to others. We all have different medical history, BMI's, co-morbities, how long we have been over weight (this I think makes a big difference too), life style, personal disablities, just so many thing to factor in that make this impossible to compare. My surgeon said if you lost over 100lbs in your 1st year your doing great. I felt like I was behind and was going to get a lecture but no I was told I got another good 6 months before I will probably plateau out so make the best of it. On the answer to your question I asked him these very questions and was told don't count calories it never worked before why would work now! Eat 3 meals a day NO SNACKS!!!!! eat a healthy balance of protein and veges and at 1 year I should be able to consume a small childs portion. Still concentrate on getting in the 64 oz of water a day. Hope this helps, Nancy -125