Sick of Food Worries

OK, OK, am I the only poster who is absolutely sick and tired of how hard it can be just to eat?? Maybe it is the holidays, and the fact that there are so many really good foods out there this time of year, but I am just about sick and tired of obsessing over food (especially carbs!!) I went to NY last week, for Christmas, and was able to enjoy some of my favorite foods in the world.. lots of carbs, too. I ate hot Italian bread and butter, delicious ravioli, sausage, cheeses, dips, etc... And I would feel lousy and guilty afterward. Finally, I had to comfort myself with thoughts of how much I have accomplished, and that enjoying my favorites OCCASIONALLY is OK. Does anyone else struggle with this? To tell you the truth, I am almost annoyed by it all. Sometimes, I feel like I am still a prisoner of food. And, when it is not food that I have eaten, it is food others have eaten. "Should I be eating this, how much can you eat, how much is the pouch supposed to hold, take the cottage cheese test", etc... It is terrible... And... last but not least... how many of you have been told by others that you eat a lot, or not enough? Why do people feel it is OK to study the plate of every post op patient in the world, and look for similaritites? I guess I am just feeling frustrated and crabby. Thanks for the vent! Andrea

Andrea, Vent away, it is OK. My major carb problem is bread especially if we go out. I was always a big pasta eater but now am satisfied with just a bite. We go out a lot to eat. Once in a while I hit a roadblock with no real choices and that can be frustrating. Most times tho I do find things on the menu that work well for me and leaving me feel like I had a good meal not that I settled. Yes, there are always going to be people in the world that have to question what we eat --- saying we are eating way too much or not enough. They do this whether it is a WLS patient or someone who has been dieting. Try to ignore them or counter back with: My gosh, I am amazed too at how much you can eat. (I know ... easier said here than done). There always will be people who need to be our food police whether we need them or not. Sometimes I think it is that they hope we will fail, sometimes it is because they are worried we will go back to old habits, and sometimes it is because they now feel insecure because we have suceeded. I've had a couple of funny cir****tances lately with friends taking us (Hal and I) out to dinner than commenting that they are so glad I can only eat a little bit so that the bill will be less!!!! Yikes, did that add pressure to the meal choices. I chose appetizer instead of the fish meal I really wanted. Told Hal, no more letting others take us out to eat. From now on we go Dutch so that I can make the choices best for me and what I really want to eat. Maybe the key to all of this is not to feel quilty when we take a detour from high protein because we will get back on track to that quickly. I feel so much better doing high protein, but do eat breads occassionally. I don't count calories but do watch that I'm doing high protein and low sugar and that I get my water in. Yes, focus on all the accomplishments that we have done since surgery ... they are immense and we have all come so far. Mary

It's okay...feel free to vent. We've probably all felt that way at one time. Sometimes I feel like this is pretty easy; other times its not and I am very aware that food and making better choices will control my life forever. At our Christmas dinner, everything looked good and I wanted it all. I put some of every item on my plate and even though I obviously couldn't eat it all, it was comforting to know that it was up to me and I could have one bite of whatever I wanted. Just filling the plate was satisfying to me...I suppose it gave me a feeling of control. I chose my favorite Christmas treat and ate it without feeling guilty. There were plenty of other desserts that I passed up; I'm human and entitled to pleasure. So are you. Unless you "holiday" everyday, there's no reason to feel lousy about what you enjoyed. People Watching? yes! I've had so many comments made about what I do or do not eat, particularly at the holidays. Everything from "Wow! Can you eat all of that?" to "Should you be eating that?" to "It's too bad you can't really eat anymore." It's annoying, but I sometimes wonder if my family and friends are trying to learn better ways for themselves to eat. Americans truly have no idea what an appropriate quantity of food is so we alternate between extreme dieting and overindulging. It's obvious that surgery and eating differently works, so they're curious about what we eat. Of course, they're seeking that magic answer that will work for them, and it's not out there, but they don't want to hear that. People have short memories where it doesn't apply to them. As we get further out from surgery, we'll be less interesting to them and they'll leave us alone. Hang in there...2005 is going to be great! Julie