Discouraged.....

Good Morning Everyone,

I just needed to come on here and vent/ b*tch for a second. I know some of you will understand me.

I am a week post op and feeling great! Thankfully.... Still a little gas, But I will live!

Anyway.. I am totally discouraged... Becasue I DO NOT feel any different.

A little about my journey.... In November at one of my pre op appointments I weighed my highest 308lbs. Another pre op appointment I went for in December I was 299... They said "Ok, we want you to loose 15lbs prior to surgery!"... OK!!! I thought to myself, yeah right... If I could loose 15lbs I would have done it already.. Now I go for my pre pre op... like a week before surgery and I was 281lbs... Yay, I was down 18lbs. I was so excited, thanks to my liquid diet. Then last monday (MY DAY) they weighed me right before surgery and I was 270lbs!!!!! Now... We are talking 38lbs total!!!! Which I am so excited about and grateful... But why do I not feel ANY different!!!!! 

I have alot of supportive people around me, whether it be friends, family, co workers, neighbors etc... and They are like, "Oh, you look great!" But, I feel like they are suppose to say that.. and It honestly gets me mad. I know I am being really hard on myself and I know this wasn't a quick fix.. and the weight was just going to go away.. When I woke up one day. But how long until "I" do feel great?!?!?!?

Anyways, Thanks everyone for listening!!

have a great day!

I am two weeks post op.  i can tell you that last week, I had several days where I was just weepy and frustrated for no reason.  i have lost 24 pounds since I left the hospital, so i should be thrilled! 

I have never been a person who suffered from depression or anything so i couldn't understand the emo state.  According to my surgeon it was hormones.  This surgery really does a number on them.  It even brought on my monthly visit a week and ahalf early while i was in the hospital.

Also, your body is helaing form MAJOR surgery.  Everything inside has been cut, moved, twisted, and redone.  That is going to take time before you feel great.  I am just now starting to feel better and get my energy back.  Once you are on purees and are getting more protien etc., you will feel better.

i was saying the same thig a week ago.  "What is wrong with me?"  "Why am I feeling so icky?"
I finally realized it was a combination of the healing and hormones.

Hang in there!  And congrats!
Erin

Hi Erin,

Its totally like a buyers remorse type thing. The hormones are raging..... One min I am happy, then next sad, then next angry... all in maybe a 5 min span!

Thanks for the words of encouragement... And keep up the GREAT work!!!!!!! 

I was the exact same way. That's how i explained it to everyone to.."buyers remorse".
I was on the 19Th too so i really do know what your going through.  It gets better.

I came home from the hospital and was 20pounds heaver then when i went in. I have lost that and then like 8pounds more. Big whoop-t-do..NOT.

I am so scared that when i can eat i wont be able to stop. I am doubtful in myself that i wont screw this up like i have screwed up everything else in the past. I was weepy about not eating...i want a freaking hamburger so bad...or at least i did the other day. I was like.."maybe i DIDN'T try hard enough b4..maybe i DIDN'T do everything i could b4 i just jumped into this...id rather be fat and happy then skinny and miserable."

But each day...each hour brings different emotions and different thoughts. I really thought the weight was just going to "fall off" each day. Id wake up and id be 10 pounds lighter. So not the case. I have cabin fever, i am annoyed with this stupid drain tube, i want to sleep in my own bed and not on the dang couch, I'm sick of liquids but my protein drinks that i "raved" about b4 surgery taste like crap now and now....i have some sort of yeast infection on both upper inner thighs and on my who-ha and i have something weird going on with my tongue...maybe its too many Popsicles and i got frost bite or maybe i have yeast on it too....grrrrrr. I get tired going for walks...and right now its so damm cold and icy i don't go out in fear of falling. I miss my poor dogs..i wont let them in the living room in fear that they will jump on me or get caught up in my drain tube,    I have tried SOOO hard to stay off the board so that i didn't bring everyone down...i have already been told b4 to keep the board "positive"


My husband is driving me nuts and i will probably post a NEW topic to ***** about that.


OH MY GOD...its never ending.


So yeah...to sum it up...your not alone...I'm sure we all feel like this to some degree. I am so proud of you for stepping fwd to say something. Like i sad i didn't want to because i was told in the past by other member's that even though i am so "passionate" about how i feel that i need to keep the board "positive"  so i didnt say anything.


SUPER BIG SORE HUGS...AIR HIGH FIVES..TAKE A SHOT OF LIQUID PAIN MED WITH ME   and we WILL get through this together.

Feel free to call me.
( PM me and ill give you my #)

I haven't had my surgery yet.  As a matter of fact, it is tomorrow.  However, I've been told it takes about a month to really feel like yourself again or even better.  In our support group, we have been told it's like going through buyers remorse and asking ourselves why did we do it?  Then at the end of the month, things really get going, and you feel great.  My month should start February 28th. LOL  Anyway, I hope this helps.  It sounds like you are doing great!!!!  Keep up the good work and you are already inspiring me with your weight loss.

Deb

Thanks Deb, It does help! Thanks so much. And good luck tomorrow. Keep us posted.

I can understand your frustration.  I'm only 4 days post op and right now I'm still feeling the major discomfort from the gas and incision areas. Although the weird thing is, I don't feel like anything is different inside (if you know what I mean).  My Corporal (who had RNY done almost 2 years ago) said this is normal, and he agreed with some of the other posts that it takes a good month or so before you really start feeling "great".  He keeps telling me to just relax, do my walking and everything will fall in place. He said the first week or two is the hardest, because of the major trauma and shock to your body, let alone all the emotional and hormonal changes. He told me that he cried for two days straight after coming home from the hospital, thinking to himself "what the h*ll did I just do to myself?"  But if you saw him now, saw his results and his total state of excitement every time he talks to someone about life after RNY, it is a total inspiration.

I don't know about you, but I know I'm probably expecting too much too soon and it gets frustrating. Sounds to me like your doing real well so don't let things get you down. Everything takes time.  (now if I could only convince myself of that I'd be doing good.... LOL )

Good luck and keep up the good work.

Kim

Thanks Kim!!! Your totally right... And If I was reading the post that I wrote as someone else looking in... I would have given them the same advice. Now, if I could only listen to myself! Thank you so much for making me realize it. And, the feeling of expecting too much too soon.... Is def there! I just need to take time!

Thanks again.... And congratulations on your success!!!! 

Take Care,
Charlotte

Charlotte I just saw this post and I so sorry I forgot to check in on you!  I totally understand how you are feeling....I was the exact same way and it honestly took me about 3 months until I was myself again. It's alot to handle.  You are on your way to so much joy I promise you!
Let me know if you want to chat or get together anytime....how arey you doing with your shakes?
I was not able to tolerate any- so that was rough.
Hang in there girl!
Deb