Update on Me

Ladies, Sorry I haven't been posting lately. As you know I have been super busy with work, but I guess the real reason is that I am actually worried or sometimes concerned about posting due to the fact that I am underweight. I am actually embarrassed that I am having a hard time controlling it. The last two weeks I was sick again with an ear infection and went to the doctor on April 22nd to get an antibiotic, but instead they decided to give me a steroid shot and put me on a low dose pack of steroids also. By Friday, I still wasn't feeling better so I called to get an antibiotic. Well by April 27th, my weight had dropped to 103. I was very worried, because usually on steroids I gain weight. I called the dr on Monday and was able to get an appt 1st thing on Tuesday. They basically said that it wasn't unusual to get under 110 for 5'3" and that my weight probably just hasn't leveled out yet. But just to be safe they would run some tests. They did a REE which measures the energy or resting energy effort and determined that my metabolism is extremely high. I have been told that I have to eat 1725 calories just to maintain my current weight of 103 and that I have to eat more. I also saw a nutrisionist for about an hour and had blood work done. I don't have the results yet of the blood tests, but hopefully will get something soon. I am back up to 105 and have been able to eat more than I was able to eat last week. I am having around 6 meals a day and snacking every chance I can think of. The problem is after all of this time working so hard to not think about food and to be healthy and not addicted to bad eating habits, I have now been told that I have to reverse some of those thought processes. This is really hard because I feel like I am not setting a good example for my support group and I am getting a lot of concerns from people being really worried about my health. I desperately need to get back to 115 lbs within the next month. I have to start journaling again too, so I can ensure I am getting enough calories in. As far as energy and emotional feelings, I am in great shape. I don't feel bad or tired at all, I just look too thin. I guess I never thought I would continue to have this problem and I am embarrassed that I didn't get better control of this a few months back. Well thanks for listening...I would gladly take some of the weight that needs to be shed elsewhere on the January board, please send it my way! Hugs, Lindy

Lindy, don't be embarassed. We are all struggling in some way or another right now. That's what we are all here for. I'm glad you posted. You can do it and I feel like journaling will really help you get a handle on it. I wouldn't worry too much about what group thinks right now. Just get to where you need to be and then level out. I can understand how you would find it very hard to have to eat the way we have been told all along not to. Just look at it as beeing for the short term. Have they told you what your Caloric intake should be at 115? Anna

You know I guess I need to ask them about the caloric intake for 115. I guess they will retest when I gain, not sure exactly. Thanks for thinking and giving me hope. Hugs, Lindy

Lindy - do you now weigh 110 or 105? Do you desire the food but restrict yourself because you are scared of gaining too much weight or the addiction to food coming back? If that is the case, maybe talking to someone such as a counselor would help. If it's just the lack of desire to eat, how about adding a high cal protein shake into your diet? I think 110 for 5'3 is pretty low, have you checked your BMI? Is it in the low side of the normal range? Everyone has different body structure, so maybe your body wants to be at 110 and looks good that little. I am just 5'2 and would not look good weighing that litlte. I am @ 125 now and would like to lose a few more lbs. But when I got down to 119 people started telling me I was getting too skinny. Please don't be embarassed to post about what's happening in your life. First of all, we are here for you and want to encourage you, Second, there might be someone out there reading your post that you could help a great deal. Hang in there ****HUGS****. Janie

Well as of today I am at 104, not back up to 110 yet. I think the reasons I don't do well are because I don't plan my meals and I don't make myself stop to eat. I generally lack the usual cravings to eat. My BMI is currently 18.2, which is definitely under weight. I have started trying to add the high calorie protein shake, I do well if I l like the shake, but if I don't like it I pour it out. I need to remember what I did before when I liked them. Thanks for thinking about me..I am hanging in there. Lindy

Lindy, Thank you for posting. I am in the same boat. Of course I was very sick and am still recovering but I am frustrated. I am 5'5" 115 lbs, and my BMI is still normal at 19.1, but I look too thin. My shoulder blades stick out in the back, you can see my ribs in my chest, and my knees are knobby. My arms are disgusting and EVERYONE who knows me and loves me is concerned. The question has been asked of me several times... what will you do if you don't stop losing??...my answer is usually that I should be ok once I am feeling better now that my bowel issues are fixed. I started eating better last week gained 2 lbs and within 2 days it was gone again. I just have no clue what to do. I was a self pay so the thought of a revision scares me. My gastroenterologist told me that my pouch portion is the smallest he's ever seen, so that only complicates things for me causing me to fear that I may never stop losing because I'm malabsorbing too much of what I take in. My husband forced me to drink an Ensure last week and I was gagging because I am sooooo sick of protein drinks and nutrional supplements. My Dad gave me a hard time and said I was acting like a child for not drinking it and that I needed it. I know I need to gain, but I don't want to have to suffer by eating yucky stuff to do it, so instead i try things like cakes and ice cream which also make me sick. Nothing is working. I see my Dr today and will go back to the gastrenterologist soon for another scope because I'm having an issue with reflux now. If it's not one thing it's another, but somehow in my mind I still rationalize that I'd rather go through all this than be fat again. I know that's wrong, but it's the truth...I can't help how I feel. Lori

Hey Lindy ((HUGS)) Sorry you are going thru this but glad to here you are feeling good in spite of the low weight. I want to ditto what Janie said..I think getting in at least 3 shakes a day should help up your calories for the day. And I am sure if you need some recipes for different shakes, members of this board can share them with you. I am a plain jane with my shakes and just do mostly vanilla or strawberry without the fruit..just yogurt and protein powder and most recently I added the SF davinci caramel syrup to my recipe and I like it! And don't even not reach out to us...like Anna said we all go thru things and we are here to support one another. Talk to you soon.