Support Group Members - WOW and Long Overdue Realization

January Lovelies (aka to quote Suzanne and others), You know, we all started at different points on our journey to weight loss. I know some of you have been struggling or not posting because you don't want to get caught up in the numbers. Which can be very frustrating and probably one of the difficult things about posting in a forum setting. I wanted to share with you a posting from a lady in my local Starbuck's Support group: http://www.obesityhelp.com/forums/TX/a,messageboard/action,replies/board_id,4845/cat_id,44 45/topic_id,3459224/ She just recently started coming back to support group meetings. Please continue to share your journey with us here on the January forum. I find that even though I have made it to my initial goals and I am at a size 2, etc. I am still in need of support. The need for support and understanding will never end. I am constantly recruiting new and old people to join in on our bi-monthly social Starbuck's meeting, because everyone has something to share / gain from the network and the underlying common thread we shared before weight loss surgery. If you find the forum just too difficult, please continue to get local support from someone. Those of you not struggling, reach out, become Angels, give back and help others to understand that this is still a lifestyle change, not just surgery. Some people in my group continue to "Break the Rules" setup by their doctors and they wander why they aren't having success. I just read yesterday the 10 Common mistakes: 1) Not taking Vits/Supplements/Minerals (long term effects of not taking properly will not be known for up to 10 years and some are irreversible) 2) Assuming you have Cured yourself from Obesity (Sometimes it's easy to feel you are cured, but deep down the possibility always still exists, this is why support is key, to see how those further out struggle and to learn now how to maintain in a healthy way) 3) Drinking with meals (just because you can doesn't mean you should) 4) Not eating healthy - (know your triggar foods and if necessary have some absolutes until you get to a point where you can control the choices you make) 5) Not drinking enough water 6) Grazing 7) Not exercising regularly (Boy am I bad on this one, hence my request for prayers yesterday to get moving again) 8) Eating the wrong carbs or eating too many 9) Drinking Soda's again (I only allow myself to have Soda's on Saturday and Sunday's but have found often that I forget or don't even want them now after surgery. Also, I read that research shows diet soda is connected to weight gain, not sure why, but it does state that) 10) Alcohol (or trading one addiction for another) I hope at least to touch one of your hearts today by sharing this with you. If you are not getting results, find someone who is motivated, uplifting and at goal to be your Angel and help you pull through your struggle arena. I am currently supporting 5 ladies on the board and off. I call them, I email them, I share with them everything that I can to help keep them uplifted. Some of them have already branched out with their support to others. I did have a WOW moment, I had lunch with my friend last night and she had the waitress take a picture of us....I was finally as thin as she has always been during our 20 year friendship. It was a WOW, but at the same time, I didn't really feel that different, because I am the same person inside now as before. I hope each of you can see this beauty or realization within yourself as I did last night. Have a Blessed Day! Hugs, Lindy

Lindy--Thanks for such a great post! I made the decision to drop out of the Monday Morning Weigh Ins on this forum because I just felt too compelled to compare myself to everyone else. It felt kind of like the old Weigh****chers meetings where everyone stood up and announced how much they lost for the week. If I were unfortunate enough not to have had a loss, I felt like such a failure. Now, I'm doing fine with my progress and feel good about my rate of loss, but still just felt like I wasn't keeping up. I still read everyone's posts, and learn a lot from everyone's struggles and triumphs and I feel bad about not sharing so others can learn from my experiences, but it is what it is. I hope this makes some sort of sense, Jen

Jen, It definitely makes sense. I am trying to figure out how to be more sensitive in how I work with people in my support group and how to help them keep motivated in a positive way with realistic expectations and help them see that their own individual success is just as monumental as people like me who are thinner. I had a whole lot less weight to loose than most of them and if not, I probably wouldn't not be in these smaller sizes. I know when I got to a 10/12, I was perfectly happy if I didn't loose another lb. That is where I set my sites. If I regain back to this size, I am not going to beat myself up. I struggle now with people telling me I am too thin. So I am working through how to make sure that I deal with those comments in a way that is productive and not negatively counterproductive to my success. I am glad that you are looking at your own personal goals and track record to determine what is best for you. Thanks for sharing. Lindy

HI Lindy... I am really glad to have this forum. I had my surgery in Mexico and have NO local support. I look to this board to make sure Im not messin this up and and I always find reassurance when I see that someone else is going through the same things I am. I post to the Monday morning weigh ins most of the time..and yes, I compare myself. But Imusually pretty satisfied that Im in line with evryone else. Some have lost a few more lbs than me, some a few less...but for the most part we're all pretty much in sync. I feel really blessed. To have had this surgery and to have a great group of people to talk to that have actually walked a mile in my shoes. Have a great day!! mary

Mary, Thanks for sharing. Glad to hear that you have made sure and had support, even though the odds are against you being that your doctor is far away. I have gone through the Dec - May boards and the January board we are on does seem to be one of the most active boards of monthly boards. I think that alone says success for all of us who had surgery in January. We keep connected and remind each other that we still need this forum for support, questions, feedback and touching base of where we are in our progress. Hugs, Lindy

Lindy, Thanks for the awesome post. (You look great btw ) You are absolutely correct... I lurk here when I'm doing poorly and post when I am on track... but I do use this as my main support group. Mostly I check in to see how you are all doing (makes me feel connected) and to check myself on my habits and how I'm doing. Your wording was wonderful and definitely timely! Grats on your wow moment and enjoy the holidays. Michele