S** DRIVE ANYONE?

Has anyone TOTALLY lost their sex drive? MINE LIKE TOTALLY went away... My husband doesnt know if he wants his H***** FAT wife back or this smaller one that has NO interest!! LOL Sorry to be so BLUNT.... But I need help!!

I thought I was the only one. Before WLS I couldn't get enough. I think I have have sex once a month......maybe. I just don't have the urge. I wish I knew why

Sigh....mine's been gone lately too. I'm assuming it'll return some day! :-/ Margaret

Well, mine has actually gone completely the other way! It's about time! It did take a while to start moving in the up direction, though. In the beginning I got the advice to "fake it till you make it", and although it was difficult at first, it really started the ball rolling, so to speak. It just sort of builds on itself. Now, I find that I am the one getting annoyed if we are too busy, or he's got too much going on and comes home tired. All I know is that when I was fat...there was not a lot of lovin' going on...by my choice. I think it became more of a habit to not want it before surgery, but now I find that I am willing to put the effort in. Perhaps you could try to schedule in one occasion each week that you stick to no matter what. See if that helps...that's what I did, only it was something that I decided for myself...my husband had no idea that's what I was doing. After a few weeks, I added another occasion. It really seemed to help. Good luck...for you and your husband! lol ~Suz

I agree with Suz - fake it until you make it. It will come back. Mine went away for awhile and sometimes I don't wanna, but most times I do!

Well, I am single and my drive has not gone away at all...I just dont have a significiant (or insignificant) person to share it with...so I am frustrated all the time and just have to it off alone lol Sorry for the TMI moment! lol

Hi Stacey, Well I have been married for 36 years (not dead yet) and believe me before the surgery I think I did it just to keep him happy. Then it was like okay time to sleep. Yea !! But since the weight loss I know I have changed. I feel better about myself and have even purchase a couple pretty little nighties. ( not sheer of course ) But maybe if you tried a new nightie and maybe some candles you will feel a little more romantic. I know I still need the lights out because I still feel saggy!! I am sure he doesn't want his Fat wife back. Remember you have been through a lot and things hopefully will get better for you. I think you will come around. Just think how sexy you are now . Roxanne

I am so with you on the lights!! My husband keeps saying, "we have been with only each other for almost 18 years...can't you trust me to see you in the light?" Uh...no. I prefer to act like a vampire... besides, the combination of the light and the saggy, stretched skin might make HIM burst into flames ! lol. I still haven't had the nerve to buy new night wear...I'm still wearing t-shirts that are 5 sizes too big. It's a wonder he even finds me remotely attractive swimming in those things.

Yeah- but don't those T-shirts feel fab!!!! I kept a few soft ones for nightshirts and I LOVE how they hang on me!!! Holly

Yeah, mine is pretty much gone also.....however it has been gone since awhile before surgery. My issue probably is having an 18 month old and an almost 3 year old who don't give us much alone time....who knows?