2 years out

Hello everyone! I have not been posting, (only lurking) and I feel like I need to get in touch with all of you Jan 06 folks. It has been 2 years sense my surgery and I find it hard to explain the ups and downs of the past 2 years. The ups have been much more prevalent, the fact that my cholesterol and blood pressure is now at normal (low) levels is amazing in itself! I also have the energy to work out and I feel good about going shopping! My feet, hips legs, and ankles do not hurt anymore, and my carpel tunnel doesn't flair up either! I feel good... no, wait a minute... Physically, I feel great! Now for the down side.... I cant get my head to connect with my body. I cant seem to see the real me in the mirror. I still see the old me. Now, I know that I have lost 100 pounds..... I know that I am down from a size 24-26 to a size 8-10, but I cant seem to get over the fact that I had hoped to loose more. I know I sound CRAZY (I am currently working on it ) but after 2 years, you would think that I would be SO OVER it, but I cant get the "old me thoughts" out of my head. With all that said, I would do it over again in a NY minute. It has not been easy, it continues to be a challenge for me. My whole life style has changed, and at times that is so difficult. Like for example... when my whole family wants to go out and get ice cream and I feel so angry at the fact that I cant have any.... or when my husband or boys want to go to the local hot dog joint for dogs and fries and there is NOTHING on the menu that I can order that is even remotely healthy.... But, I get through those days... I just have to stay VERY focused. It is nice to know that I have friends who are going through some of the same issues that I am, and if I need to all I have to do is go on line and find you all! Happy Saturday everyone!!! Cathy

Congratulations on your 2 years, Cathy! Don't forget to enjoy life even after the surgery. It's not the end of the world if you eat some ice cream or have a hot dog. Just eat something less the next day or exercise a little more. Lifes to short to let the good times pass you by. Hugs, Anna

Oh, I do eat some french fries, a bite of ice cream and a small piece of cake from time to time... It's the guilty feelings that are with me until I can start over again. I did try a hot dog once... not a good mix for my pouchie. But I do have to admit... it sure did taste good for a little while, but then I felt quite ill. But, I really need to just jump start the next day and GET OVER IT.... cath

Hi Cathy, Congrats on your two year anniversary and the wonderful health improvements. Sorry you cannot have a few "indulgences" here and there. I do find it remarkable that you are strong enough to not give in once and awhile. God Bless! Jen

Thanks and ..... I do give in once in a while, but it still makes me feel deprived and guilty. But yes, I do eat the occational "naughty" foods... Cath

Cathy wrote: "Now for the down side.... I cant get my head to connect with my body. I cant seem to see the real me in the mirror. I still see the old me. Now, I know that I have lost 100 pounds..... I know that I am down from a size 24-26 to a size 8-10, but I cant seem to get over the fact that I had hoped to loose more. I know I sound CRAZY (I am currently working on it ) but after 2 years, you would think that I would be SO OVER it, but I cant get the "old me thoughts" out of my head." I know exactly what you mean. my head it there too and has been for the last 6-9 months. I'm holding at a size 12/14, between 155-160 pounds less than I was, and still feel fat. I think it's because I was that person my whole life until 2 years ago. I have no answers for you, Cathy. I just wanted to let you know that I absolutely get you. Keep in touch. {{{{{HUGS}}}}} RobinNJ

Thanks for your reply... It helps is some absurd way to know that there are others who feel the same way. I guess I should be sorry that you totally understand what I am going through...and I am!! BUY.... It really helps to know that I am not as crazy as I sound. If others are feeling the same way, then maybe I am sort of.....normal??? Thanks for understanding! Cath

Congragulations on you great journey !!!!!!!!!! Tori