When did this happen???
Okay so if anyone read the menu post, I was saying how I was going back to basics bootcamp. My "okay with me" weight is 160-165...I weighed in at 179 yesterday. When did this happen??!! Just a few weeks ago I was scaling back on the scale 177, 173, 171 now 1 friggin' 79!!! I know when this happened. It happened when I stopped working out 2 months after surgery and I kept saying I was gonna start up this week or start up the week after. It happened when I was getting chips from the snack machine at work or eating everything that was sitting out at the desk if it looked good. It happened when I kept saying "I'll start new on Monday" then saying it the week after that and the week after that. I looked in the mirror today...I'M A FAT FRIGGIN COW!!! When did this happen??? I need to get my self together..it's my own fault, of my own demise and doing. So I need to shape it up and ship that weight out! I may be a little crazy but if that's what I need to do, then that's what I'll be doing! I'm so pissed at myself!
Fuming mad,
April
Girl...I'm not waiting!! I've started now!! I've gone to the grocery store, picked up some good stuff, looked at some local gyms...on my way there in the morning! I can't live like this. I just FEEL so unhealthy and to me, that's more gross than looking in the mirror. I'm just so mad that I've abandoned what I've learned from this surgery. It's like, "Oh, I lost the weight and now I don't have to do anything else." My friend said I was beating myself up over it and I should! I'm the one who let it get like this. Can't place the blame on anyone or anything. And I'm really upset over this!! I don't even want to see anyone from back home or see my old personal trainer! That's how ashamed I am!
at myself,
April
at myself,
April 
April,
I know I haven't posted in oh I dont know......months!!! But I hear you. I am getting ready to get a membership at the Y cause I am so pissed at myself too. I used to be like a fish and I havent swam in months either. I can say that all these damn holiday goodies can take a hike!! I am so sick of being sick from the goodies....you would think that I might be swayed from the nausea, but nooooo I just grab another and stuff it in my fat little mouth. OK enough of it. I did it now I have to get back to what I know is right. I am with you guys on this one, and I promise that I am going to start posting like I should too to make myself accountable to you guys. So someone, please kick my butt!!!
Love you all,
Steph
Isn't it funny (ironic, not Ha Ha) how we all go through the same things about the same time. It has been that way since day one. I am there too. I am going back to the exercise basics. And going to do better on what I eat. I really am doing pretty well, but the exercise is missing. Talk about right on time, I just looked at the mail and the fitness center that I belong to has started a Biggerst Losser contest. It is an eight week contest and I think it has my name written all over it. I am going to start going and exercising as well. I didn't put mine on over Christmas, but over the last few months. I go to my surgeon for my yearly in a couple of weeks and I would really like to be a few pounds less than I am right now.
Hazel
Hazel Wholly crap April! I haven't been on this board in like a year or something like that-separation, a whole new single life again, heatbreaking break-up, fall-out with family, and back with the ex 1 year later and I DO NOT even recognize you at all! You look so friggin fantastic! Be proud of that. You know you have to get back on the wagon so to speak and that is where it all starts 
I totally know what you are going through-I got to 161 which everyone said I was too gaunt-looking and you could see my rib bones on my chest which is kinda gross-but now I am at 181. 20lbs. How the? But I am like you-no gym, "Monday start-ups", bad snacks, Starbucks and I am a huge Coke drinker. And that is why I am up there again. I need a re-lesson in post-surgery eating, an eating for RNY patients 101 I guess. I have let the drama of my life take over the important things and now eat whatever I want. No good.
Well listen I wanted to say hello (and hello to any ladies/men who know me and ones that don't ) and to let you know you aren't alone. Good luck girly-you can do it-20 lbs is a whole lot better than when we started 2 years ago 
I totally know what you are going through-I got to 161 which everyone said I was too gaunt-looking and you could see my rib bones on my chest which is kinda gross-but now I am at 181. 20lbs. How the? But I am like you-no gym, "Monday start-ups", bad snacks, Starbucks and I am a huge Coke drinker. And that is why I am up there again. I need a re-lesson in post-surgery eating, an eating for RNY patients 101 I guess. I have let the drama of my life take over the important things and now eat whatever I want. No good.
Well listen I wanted to say hello (and hello to any ladies/men who know me and ones that don't ) and to let you know you aren't alone. Good luck girly-you can do it-20 lbs is a whole lot better than when we started 2 years ago Most Active
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