No good deed goes unpunished.

I am venting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So anyone that doesn't want to participate in my pitty pot, should leave right now. I have told you all what my daughter has gone through since September. And it is horrible. But now she is on the road to recovery. I have been by her side through it all, as is only right. But now she won't do what she is suppose to do to get up and around and get ready for her artificial leg. She didn't want to be in the care home, and I can understand that, so I brought her home and have promised her a home with me as long as she wants it. I am fine with that. But now she has made me her slave. Not only for her, but for her children as well. And hubby who has the beginning stages of Alsiemers, has decided that if I can do it for them, I can do it for him as well. To top it off she has started calling the boyfriend that stole everything she had when she got sick, and beat her emotionally and physically. I am exhausted. Well, my venting is through so you all have a wonderful day. Hazel

Hazel, teach them a lesson and come to Vegas with us... No I am kidding...(I want you there but understand) I am sorry you are going through this and hope things get better for you! Maybe it is time to tell them like it is....Perhaps that will make them all see it better. I am sending hugs and feel free to vent anytime.... ~~hugs and well wishes~~ Chris

Thanks, I really need the support right now. Hazel

I agree with Chris....run away and come to Vegas with us! Seriously, you're in a challenging spot becuase you've invested your heart, soul, time and finances to helping your daughter and you expect that she'll at least try. And she's not...nor are the others, which is infuriating. Have you looked at alternate ways to get her help without it being so much of you personally? While quite different, it draws some parallels to a time when my sister discovered her husband was/is a crack addict. She, too, put everything into his recovery but ultimately, he did not want to achieve the same result as she did. It just about ruined her children and was taking a huge toll on her. Until. Thru therapy she discovered she was the enabler - by constantly being there he had no reason to change. She made it all right and it continued in a big circle. Until she stepped away. It seemed like they were hitting rock bottom but the change allowed them all to get control individually - he was firmly kicked out to his own resources, she and her children were able to develop their own lives. And he's (somewhat kinda sorta) cleaned up his act. So certainly you wont abandon Frosty but if you can organize other support - someone else to kick her butt and get moving with therapy, etc.... it gives you the chance to grasp your life, enjoy quality time with her and someone else can be the caretaker and bad guy when its time to push. Sorry if this is way off base but I thought I'd share it in case there's something that helps. You have a big and generous heart. No good dead goes unrecognized, sometimes the return comes later and in ways you'd never expect. God is watching over and guiding you...... :hugs: ~Tiffany

It makes all kind of sense. I wish I could find a way to do it. She goes to the surgeon tomorrow and we will have to get a script for pt. She is off of home health. I will be takeing her to pt, but not going in. Hazel

I agree Hazel... Come to Vegas!! Sometimes you just need to step back and let them help themselves... I agree with Chris and Tiffany.. Get some outside help..so you can still live your life! My thoughts and prayers are with you. God Bless Hugs, Anna

Hazel, I completely understand what you are going through froma mother's perspective, but you need to think about yourself first, after all isn't that what we are all learning through having had WLS? I agree with the others, you need to get some outside help, someone that can be more objective in making your daughter do what she needs to for her health and her children. You can still be supportive and helpful, but let someone else take the major burden and you step in when needed. Good luck to you! Karyn

Hazel, Just want to send you love & hugs in your hard time. Make sure to take some time for yourself as you deserve it. Carly

I'm so sorry that you're having to go through all this. I certainly agree with Tiffany...see if you can find some outside help to assist you. You're at a time in your life where you definately need to be taking care of yourself. And you have to take care of yourself to take care of others! Even though Frosty has been some trialing times, she may need a little bit of "tough love" from you and for you to be stern with her. She is, after all, living in your home. Put your foot down, lady!! Vent anytime you need to....we're here for ya! April

Hazel, I hate that this is happening to you. You probably do need to consider getting help, or do the tough love thing and tell her to shape up. You want her to progress as far as she can, and she'll have to do it herself. I hope your situation gets better. I'd tell her boyfriend is out of the picture if she's living at my house, because he doesn't sound like a good thing. Best wishes. Karla 337/181/150