ever-changing goals!

I am assuming that I am not the only one from this board going through this mind set. we all had our surgery in january and this has to be happening to other people besides me! I remember when i was 290 lbs, I used to think, "man if I could just get down to 170, I wouldnt complain!" haha I lied. 170 came...ok 160 sounds perfect, i got down to 160 once about 6 years ago when I worked out and went to weigh****chers. 160 came and went, i was still complaining!! so i think to myself, "my surgeon is right 150lb SHOULD be my goal, I will be fine at 150!"....lol....you can predict what happened next! 150 came.......and went.....and 140 started seeming like the perfect weight. "i will be happy at 140, it puts my BMI in the "normal weight" category for 5'5...so this week I hit 140 on my scale. I feel fat still. I know I shouldnt, my scale tells me I am not, my clothing sizes tell me that I am not fat, but my mirror and my brain says that I am. my brain is saying "130 lbs would be perfect" lol.... please say that I am not the only one thinking like this. is anyone else DYING to know when their body is going to STOP losing weight and be comfortable? i know i have more weight that can come off, but does anyone here ever wonder IF they will stop losing and start just maintaining soon? does anyone know anyone who became UNDERWEIGHT from this surgery? so sorry for bombarding you with all my thoughts and questions, it feels good to get it all out though. usually I am a lurker and I read this board everyday, but this morning I had something to say! take care my friends!

Good morning, I feel like you. Everyone keeps telling me not to lose anymore weight, but I have come a long way. I think everyone is used to seeing me weigh 279lbs., so now I guess I look slim. I still want to lose another 25 lbs., or so. I think we have all gone through so much with our weight, that now we have a chance to really weigh what we have wanted to for so long. You are not alone, probably everyone on the board feels like we do. I am 59 and it just really scares me to think what another 25 or 30 lbs., will do to my sagging skin, oh well no one sees it but me and my hubby. I am stuck at losing 100lbs., so I welcome any weight loss right now. But I do have to remember that it has not yet been a year since surgery. Just relax, and enjoy the new you! Have a great day, Rosemary

Hi Lora, I know my doctor told me not to really go by the BMI that it's just an indicator that your body will know what it is comfortable with, so perhaps 130 might be where you need to be in order to be healthy. However, I say this with extreme caution that there have been cases of people with WLS that have become extremely too thin, so be careful and continue to take in the nutrients you need. I am doing my thesis on self esteem, body image of those pre-WLS and after WLS, the articles that i have read have all said that when you've been obese for a majority part of your life, your self-image is greatly distorted, despite losing weight. One thing I am considering is seeing a counselor to help me correct my negative thinking on body image. If you are interested in this subject, check out Thomas Cash, PHD (BODY IMAGE), he has some really good articles that discuss how poor body image (especially with women) cause alot of maladaptive behaviors...but that it can be corrected with positive body image feedback, primarily from a counselor. Anywho, just thought I'd throw that out there if you might be interested. I know for myself, I still have a hard time "seeing" my new image, I still want to put on my 26/28 clothes and when I do, I look like Dopey cause it just bags all over the place. I have problems with my self-image, and self-esteem but I am working on it. I plan on going to my university's counseling center and taking a few sessions to correct my thinking...which is funny, since here I am doing my thesis on this very thing!!! Anywho, be kind to yourself and take the time to really "look" at your body and get out those pictures and compare...that usually can ground me for a short time. I have to remember that not only did the surgery change my body but it has changed my mind as well. Take Care!!! Kelli 370/196!!!!/130

I'm right there with ya! At first, I said if I got down to a size 12/14 I'd be happy. Now, I'm wearing 7/8, and it's just not registering with my brain. I still see myself at fat...I can't help it. Me and my best friend share clothes now, and I never saw her as fat. I'm sure all of us are going through this because we truly have gone from one extreme to another quite fast. And I think Kristi H. said her doc told her not to go by the BMI scale...I agree! It's so generalized. My "normal" range is 150 lbs., and like the way I look. I'm 170 now, so I can't imagine what I'd look like 20 lbs. lighter. Hell...no one believes I weigh 170 now! And I don't know anyone becoming underweight, but I know it happens. Before I had surgery, there was a girl on the main board who was underweight, and her doc was harping on her big time. I, too, wonder what I'm gonna do to maintain. I work out regularly (most of the time), and the lbs. drop fast that way. And feel free to share with us whenever! April

I'm not as far along as you are. I started at 327 and today I am 207. So that's 120lbs. My doctor's goal for me is 200 pounds. But I was thinking from the start that 180 would be great. But, I'll do one step at a time. Let me get to 200 and then I will re-evealuate. To get to a normal BMI I would have to get down to 169 pounds and I think that's just too little for me. Maybe I could be that weight for a day but I don't think I could maintain it.

HI I worried about that at first when the weight rolled off. but now I'm down 141#s and have 43 more to go till I reach the weight my nurse and I have agreed upon- Doc wanted me to lose only 16 more pounds, but like you said, that hardly seems like enough. i started at 378/now 237- so 198 is the ultimate goal (right now) size 18 tops and 20(loose) pants. I am loving the ride. still feel fat? oh yes. I am still in shock when people don't call me fat- which alot of people felt compelled to do prior to this surgery. No wonder we have body image issues!!!! I think back to a year ago and would never have believed I could lose 140#s. Boggles my little mind. cj