How do you respond to.........

Hey gang! Just wondering how to respond to comments like if you lose anymore you are going to blow away. Or the comment of "Would you stop losing, your gonna fade away" I dont know how to respond to these comments. As most of you know I have been pretty much at my goal for 3 months now and havent lost since this past week. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Had one comment that left me speechless this weekend, I had this guy tell me that he thought I was way to skinny and that he thought i looked better at my old weight. I dont want to offend anyone tho either. Suzette

I was told today "You lose anymore and you will look like a skelaton! My response was NEVER TELL A FAT CHICK SHE IS TOO SKINNY! I still have 23 pounds to lose and I really usually respond with....When I decide to stop I will let you know...you will never satisfy everyone and ultimately YOU are the only one who can decide when it is right for you. I also wouldn't worry about offending anyone as they do not seem to care when they offend us. I hope this helps! ~~hugs and well wishes~~ Chris

First, congrats on the great weight loss. Now, as for the comments.........they can be pretty rude some days. Tonight a doc here in the ER told me I was anorexic. I told him my BMI was still in the high normal and that I could stand to loss a few more pounds. He went on to give me a long speech. Yesterday I had at least 3 people tell me I was getting too skinny. WHATEVER!? Never did these same people tell me I was too fat 10 months ago. But now they feel its ok to voice there oppinions............ kristi

I get those comments too. I usually just laugh. I know that most of the time people make those comments because they feel compelled to say something and don't know what else to say. They are so used to seeing us large that, to them, we do look too skinny. Having said that, if my PCP or my surgeon start telling me I am too skinny I will listen. As for offending anyone...if someone persists in lecturing me about my weight I wouldn't hesitate to shut them off. I don't worry about offending the offensive. For that guy who made the comment about preferring the way you looked at your old weight... I'd have had to tell him that he didn't have to live in my skin at that weight. I always stress to people how much my health has improved with the weight loss. That usually gives them something else to focus on. I think they are more comfortable talking about coming off medications instead of weight. Susan

Suzette: Yeah...I am not sure what the motivation is of people who say these things. I am sure it is not a genuine concern. Well, at least not with most people. My parents came up from FL over Thanksgiving and my Dad sternly told me not to lose anymore weight. So I did not bother to tell him that I still want to lose 16 more lbs. I know his words were based on concern. But other people? I don't know. Someone told me just yesterday that my collarbones were sticking out so that I should definitely not lose anymore weight. I just ignore the comments because they have not lived my life and do not understand what I have been through. I do not think anyone means to be rude. Maybe it is just better to just take the high road and ignore them. Hugs, Jersey

I am at a loss for words also. I hear so many times the same sort of things. It makes me crazy because I know that I am not at my goal yet. I still have 20 lbs to go! I guess that they are so used to the "old me" that they just dont know what to say to the "new me". Are they really concerned, or just at a loss for words so they say anything that they think will make us feel good? That is what I love about this web site. We understand the ups and downs of WLS. Cathy

I get this sometimes, too... and I'd still like to lose another 40+ pounds... I know some of them are meant as compliments, but it doesn't feel that way when it comes into my ears... especially when I know how I felt a year ago, and knowing my goal is still out there... Just let it roll off your back... When they tell you that you fill blow/fade away... Just tell them... "no, I probably won't blow away... there's still a lot left." and change the topic. You've come too far to let comments get to you... remember how the snide remarks hurt when we were bigger... we are still the same people... comments that are negetive reinforcement are always going to hurt us... Best wishes & much love, Angela