Wake up and remember 8 months ago!!

What I am about to say is in no way meant to hurt anyone's feelings. It is only meant as a reality check for those of us who have lost sight of how we should be living our new lives. Eight months have changed all of us immensely, not only physically but also emotionally. I have lurked on this board since my surgery in January reading all your posts and feeling all of your ups and downs. The one thing I have had a hard time reading is the post about the things we should not even be thinking about. I guess at this point your asking yourselves what the heck is this woman talking about. I'm talking about the fact that some of you actually think we can go back to the way we ate or drank before. Wake up! We can't! Soda's are a no no, Fried foods are a no no, Caffeine is a no no, Alcohol is a no no, candy, cakes, cookies they are all no no's. That is what got you where you were before. You cannot go back to that EVER! How can you even think that it is ok to do it now? Remember how you felt before your surgeries. I know you were all saying you would do anything to loose the weight. You would work out, eat right, and follow all the rules. I guess those feelings are not as fresh as they were 8 months ago. Try to remember how you felt and why you chose to have this LIFE THREATING surgery and when you ask yourselves again if you can just have one drink or one soda or one small piece of cake the answer ino. You CAN get big again, your surgery can fail and if it does this time it's your fault!! Please think before you eat and do what you promised yourselves 8 months ago and make a positive change in your lives to be healthy. The food and drinks are not worth the side effects that will take place in your lives because of your poor choices. I feel like I know many of you just from reading your posts and I see some behaviors that are going to have harsh repercussions later when the honeymoon is over and many of us have moved on from this chat board.

First of all I am really glad you came out of lurking. Second of all I did not have this surgery to be on a diet the remainder of my life. My doctor never said anything about caffeine being a no no or any of the foods you have mentioned(he said we can have anything in moderation) I do not think having some of the "nono's as you put it" in MODERATION will harm us. We are all human but there is no way we will "harm ourselves if we do this in moderation. I do not have "nono's"...I used to eat a bag of cookies, or three quarters of a cake or whatever.... I will occassional have one bite of cake or one spoonful of ice cream or even one glass of wine. Everything in moderation is fine. It is when you "pig out" that you get into trouble. I do exercise (I walk 2 miles everyday) I do appreciate this surgery and everything it has brought me and I do believe we can "treat" ourselves every once in a while. I know that I personally realize what I can do and can't do as far as food goes but I kinda felt like this whole post "coming out of Lurking and then preaching what you think you know about all of us was kinda of a flame. I am sorry if this post seems like a flame back but I just needed to say what I feel over this... Welcome to the board... ~~hugs and well wishes~~ Chris

Like I said before this was not meant to hurt your feelings. Everyone's surgeons say different things. If you had to resort to such a drastic surgery obviously you could not eat in moderation in the first place and like a drug addiction you cannot just have your "evil" in moderation. If you want to believe that one bit can't lead to two or more then you have blinders on. This is a life change not a short till I loose my weight change. I am really curious which of us will be the lucky ones to succeed in a lifetime of keeping the weight off. Which of us will fall back into gaining the weight back. I think being honest with yourself and the reason you got to the weight you were at is the best thing. I would say lets make a pack to meet back here on this chat board 5 years from now on our surgery month and see who failed and why but that would be hurtful and I doubt anyone who failed because they "ate in moderation" would truly tell on themselves for fear of the embarrassment they would feel. If your surgeon or dietitian did not mention the foods I listed then something is wrong. They are no no's. Thanks for the welcome and I hope I'm not offending you Chris.

Maranda.... I think you're being a bit cruel. Each of us had/have our own issues for getting to where we were whether it be medical or like me... just plain lazy and eating fast food all the time. Yes, I admit it... I would rather sit 20 minutes in the drive through than walk the 2 minutes inside the restraunt and out. I decided to have this surgery to save my life. At 21, I wanted to die.... I was sick, depressed, immobile, in pain, and had a number of health problems. Now, with a loss of 180 pounds I am nothing like I was 8 months ago. I have learned how to eat, I have learned to exercise and the joy it gives me when I finish is undescribable (lol did I spell that right? lol) I have a social life, I've jumped head first into school and have even found myself an amazing boyfriend. All because I love me now... and with out this amazing tool of a pouch, lovingly named Pookie, I wouldn't be the person I am today. Yes, in five years some may be struggling with their weight again... heck it could be me! But I know in my heart if we all kept in touch and *supported* each other instead of lectured, we'll all be successful. Jaci

Miranda, I think we started off on the wrong foot. I just want to ask you somethings. Why would you pick to come out of "Lurkdom" with such a "lecturing" type post. I feel as if you are being self rightous and saying you do none of those things. I have been very GOOD about keeping to my protein and healthy eating. And if you have been lurking all this time you would no most of us are the same and diet and exercise is very important to us all....I drink water and protein drinks/with coffee and I exercise. Your post makes it sound like we used this surgery just to get thin. I had this surgery to save my life. I had a sister who died in Feb of 05 from a brain aneurysm and I had all the same health risks. She was 42 and left behind 3 kids and 2 grandchildren. I didn't want to die. I now love to up and out...something I did not do before. I actually get dressed instead of throwing on a tent....I look forward to walking and as far as food goes my main concern is protein and low cal food. Everything I put into my mouth I personally question. My husband will say would you like a bite of this (CHIP, COOKIE, OR WHATEVER) and my usual response is no..it's no good for me. I am not perfect and I bet in 5 years I might gain some of the weight back..but you do NOT know me or my determination and I bet in 5 years I will be better than I was last year. My point is that you just coming out of lurking and putting this post out there is a judgement that NONE of us need. I am no longer the FAT chick and no not need to feel inferior to anyone. I hope you take this post as just an opinion and no that I am not judging you or flaming you. I am welcoming you to this board and hoping we can build a friendship.... ~~hugs and well wishes~~ Chris

Morning Maranda! Welcome to the board and out of lurkerdom. I sure hope your tool has been super effective and you feel amazing. I know I do! I am guilty of tasting delicious treats such as a tiny bit of cake, or ice cream, can't forget about my Starbuck's SF Hazelnut Latte! But that is me and I am happy with what I eat. I elected to have life threatening surgery to help me give myself a better life. If I can't see a piece of wedding cake in the future, what the heck? lol! Even with having some delectible treat every once in a great while or eating those doritos yesterday, I am no longer eating 2 double cheeseburgers, a large fry and a large diet coke 3-5 times a DAY at McDonalds. I am no longer eating the Ultimate Cheeseburger with Large curly Fries at Jack in the Box... I no long have a desire to eat those. They're in the past. I don't think our brains are going back to the way we were before. I think our brains are relaxing and realizing we can eat like normal human beings and like Chris said- in MODERATION In the beginning we were protein protein protein... now, my doc has me adding in complex carbs, veggies and more fruits... that is definately more to eat that before... especially since the swelling in our pouches has died down. On soda/caffeine/alchohol... I cannot stand diet coke/pepsi... but oh how I love a little swig of the Diet Pepsi Jazz now and again... I let it sit out for hours over ice and by the time I get to drink some, its all watered down Caffeine? dude, I need my Iced Grande Sugar Free Hazelnut Percent Latte sometimes! LOL Its a little treat just for me... plus, my boyfriend likes the buzz it gives me he he, just kidding! Alchohol: I've tried it once, and believe me, I don't plan on doing it for a while... but if it floats yer boat, go for it lol. I hope you continue to post to the boards, but let's try and make everything a bit more positive. I felt as if you were lecturing a bit to us, and we are all in this together... lets be supportive of each other Jaci 393/213/175

Your right I should not have lectured and am truely sorry. I just got worried for me and others who had the surgury. The odds are not on our side we will stay thin if we don'****ch what we are eating as well as what. Thanks for the coffee laugh!

We have to be so careful with our chosen words online because the people on the other side of the computer cannot read our facial expressions or hear the upbeat or down low tones in our voice. Plus, when we've been together for a whopping eight months, everyone cares for each other deeply... we're all looking out for each other. I gotta make someone laugh each day, chick and I glad I made you laugh! Jaci

I think it's horrible of you to lurk the board and then come out when you decide that you have something to say about the things we rant about or eating habits. IMO, this board is the best board on OH and I appreciate everyone. It's a place where we can express ourselves, be honest about our struggle, cry or just rant without being judged. My surgeron and nut say that he doesn't want me to be on a strict diet forever. They want me to learn moderation. They want me to be able to live a normal life and eat like a normal person. I drink diet soda sometimes. I have had something fried since surgery and I do drink alchocol socially but I dont do these things everyday.. again, its' all about moderation. My cousin had surgery 4 years ago and she eats normal things. fried, sweets and soda but she follows the moderation rule. She has maintaied at 160 lbs. for 1 1/2 years. I choose to be a little more strict with myself more than others because I have a long way til goal but I do allow myself splurge on holidays, parties or sometimes on Saturdays. My weight loss has never stopped since surgery so I'm sticking to what I'm doing. I hope you stay out of lurk mode and join in and not only come out when you have something "off the wall" to say. I'm not at all offended just truly suprised that someone would pop in out of nowhere to say the things you did. Kay

Maranda, welcome to being a non-lurker. We all gladly welcome you to the January OH board, but don't need criticism and lectures, just support. No one can deny themselves forever of food. Learning to eat in moderation is what it's all about. A bite or two of chips, biscuit, cake, pie, etc. isn't going to hurt anyone. Eating it everyday or too much probably will. No one here knows why anyone else had surgery, nor is it their place to assume why they had surgery. If any one person thinks they can avoid any temptations for the rest of their life, they'll probably go off the deep end at some point. We just need to make good choices, and eat our few bad choices in moderation so we don't feel deprived. Karla