Reality vs. my fat self image

I cannot believe I am in a size 14! My mind keeps saying stuff like "You aren't really a 14, they are just stretch pants" or "maybe the sizes in that store are larger than regular stores". You know, crud like that. I have checked the size label inside the pants so many times that my husband got mad at me. I climbed out of bed to give it one more look and he went ballistic. "If you check that label once more, I 'm gonna flu****!" Why can I not believe it? I wasn't expecting it for another 4 months! I just got into a 18 top. I never realized that my bottoms were that much different. In my mind, I can barely accept that I am a size 18, but a 14???!!!! No way! This morning, I pulled out my old size 28/30 pants in preparation for the clothing exchange next week. I couldn't believe how big they were! I can see why our maid always got my pants mixed up with my husbands. I tried them on. I can almost get both legs inside one side! I hoped this would help my fat self image to adjust to my new reality, but I am still having trouble. Any suggestions?

I AM a size 14, I AM a size 14... Repeat that 1,000 times. There don't you feel better now? I think the only thing that will help is time. Time for your head to catch up to your body. And of course I think that more practice shopping for that fabulous size 14 would be helpful. Yes, I think that as your main course of treatment I prescribe a major shopping trip! By the way your new pictures look GREAT!!!!!!!!! Jenny

I agree with Jenny - it will definitely take time. I get a monthly newsletter from my surgeon's office chronicling the weight loss journey and the most recent article from our nutritionist was about how, for the first time in our lives, we will know why anorexic people are how they are. In their mind, they are always fat, no matter what they lose or how they look. For a short time WLS patients do the same thing. Isn't it scary to see how easy it is to think that way?? Our brains will catch up with our bodies - and by that time we can say..... MAN! I look GOOD! Amanda

OMG AMANDA!!!!! I almost did not recognize you!!! If you did not have that little "old picture" in the corner of your posting pic I would have not put the name with the face! Holy freaking cow girl.... you look FANTASTIC!!!!! Brightest Blessings for a Wonderful Day~ Jamie M. aka Lady Autumn Weight- 257/169/146 BMI- 44.1/29/25 Height- 5'4" Total Weight Loss: -88 lbs. Surgery Date- 1/19/05 Visit my OH profile or stop by My Weight Loss Journey Website at: home.bellsouth.net/p/PWP-LadyAutumnsWLSjourney Visit my Live Journal at: livejournal.com/users/magickalmom

AAAwwww! Jamie!! You do know how to make a girl BLUSH!! Thanks for the great compliment! I'm glad that the only part of me that is still the same is the inside "me". Amanda 266/186/147 (-80)

Tell me about it! What is confusing for me is that my size fluctuates so darn much! I fit into a 10 and look fairly good on most attempts. I fit into a 11/12 with or without my girdle and 13/14's in some things still look OK and are not completely falling off just yet. (Thank goodness... I cannot keep up with my new found shopping addiction!) OH man... I really cannot wait to get moved to our new duty station and start fresh! Of course I am going to keep one good fat picture of me hanging in my house so that I will always be reminded of what can happen if I do not take care of myself. Once I get all settled in I have to plan a trip to TX, I am dying to go out with you girl! You, me, and the hubby's are gonna have to go out on the town! You are gonna have to prove to me that my preconceived notions of TX are wrong! Brightest Blessings for a Wonderful Day~ Jamie M. aka Lady Autumn Weight- 257/169/146 BMI- 44.1/29/25 Height- 5'4" Total Weight Loss: -88 lbs. Surgery Date- 1/19/05 Visit my OH profile or stop by My Weight Loss Journey Website at: home.bellsouth.net/p/PWP-LadyAutumnsWLSjourney Visit my Live Journal at: livejournal.com/users/magickalmom

You have preconceived notions about TEXANS!!!????? Fie! For shame! Ya'll yankees think we all talk like Dallas TV show, are ultra conservative, rednecked yokels with a 5th grade edyucashun. WELL! Enough about my relatives. LOL! WE are ultra-liberal, city-raised (Houston), culturally enlightened, college educated (Grad school) hippies from the '60's who speak with no trace of a Texas accent(unless we choose to). O.K......and maybe a few small local phrases sprinkled in here and there like"ya'll" and "fixin' to go". We like Renfests, museums, european travel, international cuisine, reading, woodwind quintets, art films, and good wine. Also, BBQ, Mexican food, and Rocky Horror Picture Show! We march at Gay rights parades, and go to church at UU. We mind our own business and expect the same from others. We love to laugh and like people who can laugh at themselves. We would love to get together and hit the Irish pubs for open mike night. Our little band plays a mean Celtic set. I sip on the St. Brendans Irish Cream VERY SLOWLY! LOL! Come see us and we'll hit the beach at South Padre Island. Woo Hoo!!! BTW, where are you moving to and when? I forgot!