Suicide of a friend

I just found out last night that a friend took her own life this week. It has shaken me up pretty badly... I had only met her on a couple of occasions at the support group meetings - she always seemed like she had it together, though... She gave support to so many - why not herself you ask?!? That is also my question -- one which I cannot ask her now. I always tell my children "tomorrow is another day and a different day - be sure not to miss it!", whenever we hear of a teenage suicide. I wish Karen was here so I could tell her the same thing. She had struggled with the loss of her best friend "food" for many years since her WLS journey, and had traded that addiction for a few others. On a soapbox note to all of my friends here -- most of us have mental health insurance paid visits -- just remember to use them if you feel the need... EVERYONE who I have spoken with who are about 6 months to 1 year out have "head" issues -- don't wait for the monster to engulf you, talk it out and always remember.... "tomorrow is another day and a different day - be sure not to miss it!" I loving Memory of Karen! Wendyb

I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I really don't think that we would have the weight issues if we didn't have the head problems. I like your saying mine is :I refuse to let yesterday keep me from tomorrow:. Big HUg and a prayer for you and your friend...............Peggy

Wendy, my deepest sympathy goes out to you in the loss of your friend. I pray that her soul is finally at peace with our Lord. It is unfortunate that she was not able to reach out for help in her time of need. I guess why there is that saying that you can never really tell what a person is thinking by just looking at him or even talking with him. Some people are just able to mask their most inner feelings. I know that I have my own issues but always think of my children first, and how like you said "there is always a tomorrow". Take care and have a nice weekend! Aloha, Pat

My deepest sympathies on the loss of your friend. Suicide touches so many lives, in ways we never imagine. I lost my father to suicide when I was 18, and my sister 8 years later. Both were suffering depression and needed medical intervention. Sadly, they refused it. Here is a tip: If someone you love is severely depressed, insist that they see medical specialists as well as mental health specialists. Often there is a treatable chemical imbalance. I found out too late that the condition is genetic in my family from FOUR generations. Could not help my Dad and Sis, but saved me from going down the same road. I monitor my own mental health with regular mental health checkups. I call them my "reality checks". LOL If I had it to do again, I would have had my sister committed if she refused treatment. She would have cussed my *#@ out, but she might still be here today to know her niece and nephew. Think of what she missed!!! In addition, my best friend has similar problems but has FINALLY received treatment and has got her s#*t together at last. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

Wendyb, So sorry to hear about the tragic loss of Karen. Thanks for sharing that story with us. It is very important for all of us to support each other at OH, because some of us do not have anyone/anything else for support. I personally know how hard it is to deal with depressive episodes, and the chemical changes that happen alongside the depression are sometimes very hard to treat, even with medication and counseling. I notice a lot on the main board that the longer-term postops are VERY supportive and helpful, but rarely receive or ask for support themselves. Thanks to those of you who have supported me and helped me so far on this very hard life-changing journey. Sue