PLEASE HELP - I AM REALLY PANICKING...

Hello, you beautiful bunch of losers! I am in major panic mode, and I hope I can get some advice from my fellow January 2004 group! All of a sudden, it seems that I am getting hungry more often, and I am able to eat a lot more. For example, I am freaking out over today's food that I ate...here is how it went today so far... 8:00AM - Atkins Morning Start Blueberry Breakfast Bar 10:00AM - Slim Jim Beef Stick Meat Snack 11:00AM - Designer Whey Strawberry Protein Smoothie 12:30PM - Cup of Homemade Chili with Beans 2:30OM - Yoplait Low Carb Yogurt 5:30PM - Came in the house starving, ate a small "child's lunch-size baggie" of Cheetos Puffs (as a treat, 12 grams carb), then followed by 4 miniature sweet red peppers (they are the size of jalapenos, but are actually sweet), and then followed by a small sugar-free Blueberry Muffin! This was eaten one after the other - HOW did I eat all of this without getting overly full? We are having chicken breast for dinner, so I hope I will get my usual full feeling after eating some chicken like I usually do, and I can stop panicking. But - seriously, this seems like an incredible amount of food that I ate today, and I am so scared! I am SCARED TO DEATH! I can think of nothing else! I just moved to Alabama from California, and during the past two weeks, I had been eating out for every single meal, due to movers and things being packed, etc. I thought I was always making good choices, and not overeating, but in the two weeks I GAINED THREE POUNDS - and I am so scared! I know men aren't supposed to cry, but I never felt more like crying in my life. After the multiple hospital stays for bowel blockages and then the more recent kidney surgery for tons of stones, I would hate to go through all of this (and the three hernias on my incision line) if only to gain back the weight. I am TERRIFIED. I am over 13 months out, and I know that I lost over 205 pounds, and that I am beyond goal, but I DON'T WANT TO GAIN ANY WEIGHT! My family actually said they were grateful that I gained three pounds - I was mortified and I wanted to just hide. Is there any idea how to handle this? It is enveloping every thought, all day. I AM SO AFRAID TO GAIN - and I am so afraid of eating so much!! Any thoughts you lovely people can please share with me will be so much appreciated - more than you know! God bless you all, Michael

Hi Michael. In my opinion there is no substance to what you ate during the day. The protein drink and the yogurt are liquid form so they don't necessarily keep you full for longer periods of time. You are definately not alone in being afraid to gain. I am certainly not perfect. If I were you, I would buy some deli meat and cheese and snack on that during the day. I don't mean graze but I think this might keep you fuller longer. Or, if you have to eat out, find some meat. Hope this helps. Leanne

Hi Leanne - Thanks very much for your reply. I am calmer today - in hindsight, I am trying to now be logical and come to grips with the fact that I will not lose forever, and that some weight fluctuation is normal. When I started this whole process, my original goal was to weigh 220 pounds - I thought that would be a miracle. And here I am now, at 173 (I was 170, but I had gained the 3 pounds in the past two weeks). Also, once our body stabilizes, it will fluctuate, so I am still way ahead of the game. I don't know why I "lost it" like that on the message board, and I apologize. It was the first significant gain that I have ever had since surgery, so I guess I was just thrown off guard. It is really a scary thing, but I am back today, watching my protein and eating the best that I can. Thanks again for the reply - I really appreciate it. Have a lovely day! - Michael

Hi Michael, I think if you read other posts here you will see that there are many of us experiencing the same thing. I am really beating myself up today, I went to the store for a few things and proceeded to buy and EAT a donut! I can't believe I did that. I have been eating more lately and fortunately have not seen any weight gain, but if this keeps up it surely will. I need to get my act together and get back on program. I want to lose another 5 lbs. to get to my personal goal. I know I can do it, but it has been so much harder now. You have done a phenomenal job and have nothing to worry about. We are all going thru the same thing right now. With perseverance we can succeed. Good luck to you! Kim R/az 233/135/130

Thank you very much Kim, for the encouragement! You are doing great too, by the way, and I don't think a once-in-a-blue-moon donut will destroy your program, so that's no biggie. It's when we do it every day that it can be scary. I appreciate your comments, and by the way, you look great! Talk to you later, Michael

Thanks Michael, I was really beating myself up for that darn donut! Ugh! I appreciate the compliment, but that is my "before" pic. I'm waiting for them to update my current pic here, it's been about 3 weeks now. I know they're behind so hopefully it will be any day now. Keep up the good work! You have done amazing! Kim R/az

First of all...I think you look wonderful and have done a terrific job!! Congratulations! Second...I just had a meeting with my doctor a few weeks ago and he told me that I need not panic on the amount of food That I ingest and not to worry about it. As long as you are conentrating on eating protein and getting your "vities" down along with water and exercise. If you panic...you release a hormone that makes you want to eat more. It's ok to gain a few pounds. It's normal and ok. Because in time. If you continue to follow your diet...they will come off and if they don't, you still look great and feel great. The biggest problem I see is the panic mode. Take one day at a time and don't weigh yourself so much either. This list of food you had that particular day was actually a meal or such that I would eat. and at those intervals as well. I do eat starches and snacks as well. But I limit them and it looks like you have limited them too. I think you are doing great. Just to remind you....when you had that surgery, you were wired inside so as not to gain a ton of weight back. My doctor told me its ok and normal to gain a little once you have plateaued. But you will never get as big as you were before because your insides are wired differently and there is truly no way of gaining all of that back. It goes through your system soooooo much faster and doesnt have the time to sit very long. I just want to encourage you to relax and take meals in stride. If you don't get that "full" feeling, start making sure you only eat so many ounces at a meal each time and eventually your stomach will adjust and you will start feeling the full feeling again after it gets used to the smaller amounts. Honestly, I think that you have nothing to worry about. Stress of moving ( think you said you were moving...sorry!) or any stress can add pounds even if you are not eating anything at all....so take a deep breath and take one meal and one day at a time. By the way are you taking vitamin b-1? It's a metabolisim booster and helps you maintain. If you are not taking that...give it a shot...just one a day and you can get it over the counter. Any brand will do. I know it's easy for me to say don't panic...but I have been where you are at and gained a couple of pounds and didn't want to ...but I did what I suggsted to you and I did't lose the extra couple of pounds but I lost inches and maintained for the last 4 months now and I DO eat some of the "bad" stuff....just in moderation. I have confidence in you and I think you are doing great. If you need anything or just want to talk...let me know Amy