MONA is back My Overwhelming Never-ending Appetite

Hi fellow Jan. WLS patients. I thought of this today and wrote it to be shared with others. I am afraid of Mona and I hope this helps put her in her place. I started at 270 pounds and now weigh 166! I have an eating disorder, I don't know if it is a social coping mechanism I've acquired in life, or a genetic hand me down from my ancestors. For the first 6 months after WLS I had a vacation from my eating disorder, but now it is back. Her name is MONA, My Overwhelming Never-ending Appetite. Mona has been with me since puberty. She expects to be fed 24/7. If not fed she makes me sick with headaches, nausea, insomnia. Mona even wakes me up at night to eat! When I do feed her, she is never satisfied. Mona is very persistent and persuasive. Last month she convinced me that chocolate and pistachio nuts are good low carb snacks! And I believed her!!. I have been eating about 4 cups of pistachio nuts each day and 200 to 500 calories of chocolate each day (or should I say night). This is grazing, this is Mona! She is lazy, selfish, and very immature. She doesn't like me to go to WLS support group meetings or go online for help. Mona wants me to stay isolated so she can have me all to herself. She tells me exercise is useless, it never made a difference before. Well Mona, now that you have a real name, I can recognize you for what you are. You are a self-centered liar who doesn't care about my health. You only care about food, anyway you can get it regardless of its consequences. So every time I hear you I recite this to myself; THINK THINK THINK DRINK DRINK DRINK PROTEIN PROTEIN PROTEIN ACTION ACTION ACTION Avoid grazing and grazing foods. Maintain a good level of activity. Record food on those grazing days. Don't beat yourself up over slips, increase water, protein and exercise. Try one day a week with only two meals. 09/13/04

Susan- Bravo for having the guts to actually put this in print!!! I think that is a HUGE step in trying to get things back under control!!! I also have been haunted once again by my food addiction....I have done pretty good keeping it in check, I will not allow those "trigger" foods in my house.... I have found that eating every 2 1/2 hours works for me...this way, I say to myself....you will not "die" if you wait till your next scheduled meal.... Just know that you are not alone, and if you ever need to chat..I am here!! Lori 222/154.5/1?? laprny 1-6-04

Hi Susan, I agree with Lori. It took alot of courage to write this and I hope you find lots of support among the amos board and your support group meetings. Some people would not be able to admit they have an eating disorder. Take each day one at a time. I have two major concern. One is the surgar that you are consuming. I understand the need for a bit of choc. However do not buy regular m&m's but surgar free choc pieces. and the 2nd one would be the grazing. Grazing is a way to out eat the surg. before you pop that choc. in your mouth think about how far you have come and what you want to achieve. I think if you limit your meals it will only make you hungry and you will revert into that old diet habit. Repeat we are not on a diet we eat healthier and are healthier Head up and if you ever need to chat i am here. shay 12/9/03 296/149/133

WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! You tell MONA~

I think we all have a Mona and she needs a punch in the head. Stay away, go back to the darkest closet you came out of many years ago. We don't need her anymore. This WLS tool we now have to use as the lock for that closet. Just had to put my 2 cents in about how I hate MONA. Best of luck to everyone. Dawn -100