Frustrated with sisters!

Hi all! I'm so frustrated with 3 of my 4 younger sisters. Please give me some advise! I don't know about you, but my mom and sisters are really upsetting me! I have four younger sisters 2 of whom would be considered obese (and one of them is on liptor and is a diebetic). One is probably about 10 pounds over weight (she just lost about 45 lbs. and looks great, she is always telling me how good I look) and the other one is probably only about 10 pounds overweight. Anyway, my one sister asked my daughter if she thought I looked anerouix (sp?) and my daughter said no, my sister then said I think she does, she doesn't need to lose anymore weight. Go figure! Not once has my mom told me how good I look, or that a particular outfit looks nice or that I'm doing a great job! I was in the hospital for 6 days and not one of them came to see me! My one sister (the one who has lost the 45#) called me everyday and has been very supportive throughout my journey (she doesn't have a vehicle). Is anybody else dealing with these issues? It really upsets and hurts me! I have done something that has made my life HEALTHIER and happier. Heck, I've probably added 20 years to my life! I've lost 107 pounds! Any comments, thoughts, and advise would be greatly appreciated! 248/236/141

Kimberley, As sad as it is, they are probably jealous. You have done something to give you back control and you're life. You are no longer dependant on food and you made a choice that will allow you to live a lot longer. You are doing things that you haven't done in years. You're one sister who keeps in good contact, understands you're struggle and understands why you did what you did. You're other sister is probably jealous because she wouldn't have the guts to do this surgery. You probably look way better than her too! It is so wrong of her to have asked you're daughter what she did. Just from that comment, I do say she is probably jealous. She doesn't want you to look better than her! As for you're mom, if you're mom is overweight, probably the same thing. Or if she is thin, she probably doesn't get it. You really need to be fat to understand us and understand why we are the way we are and why we made the choice to do the surgery. If you're a thinner person and have always been that way, you will probably never understand. I am truly sorry that you have to put up with this crap. You have worked so hard and you deserve to be happy. It's really a shame. But Kimberley, concentrate on the good parts and if they don't want to be supportive, just ignore it no matter how much it hurts. You just keep working on losing and making yourself look awesome! You did this for you, not for them and you don't need their approval! You don't. It's nice to have the support of you're family and a mother's approval, but you don't need it. You have support from so many other sources! So smile, be proud of how far you have come and just keep looking forward! Good luck, Kasey

Kasey- Thanks so much for your kind words and for understanding. Every thing you said makes perfect sense. My mom is not too overweight maybe 10 pounds. She's a diabetic and has lost one leg and part of her other foot. I sooo did not want to end up like her. My dad died from complications of diabeties and lost both legs, his eye sight, was on dialysis, and had heart problems and I really didn't want to end up like him! I'm so afraid that my one sister is going to end up like my parents. She's already on medicine for diabeties and chlorestol. I really didn't pick the easy way out! None of us who have had the WLS did! I struggle every day! Whether it's making myself excerise or with food! It will truly be a battle for the rest of my life, but a good battle! Wishing you luck on your continued WLS journey! Kimberley 248/236/141/125 Some day I hope.

sorry to hear about your sisters but I am in similar situation with my best friend of almost 18 yrs. we live in the same town and i talk to her briefly once evry 6 weeks or so and its always about her. She was against the surgery from the beginning but i dragged her down for the consult and made her cry in drs office she swore it wasnt about her jealousy towards me looking better, but i believe it was.she did spend my surgery time with me in hospital but after that things started changing. we used to talk 3 times a day and see each other every week at least once...Im lucky if i see her once every 3 months and thens its a casual thing meaning it was with other friend or we ran into each other...Not once has she said i looked good but she says it too other people...shes about 120 pounds and I believe her losing her fat best friend where she would get all attention and i would get none has hurt her..The only advice i can give you with your sisters is ignore them..This is a choice you have made for yourself and one you should be proud of and now you know how the world feels about you..Doesn matter how much it hurts me shes like that i refuse to let her win, i dont need negative people in my life...btw i was 322/almost 8 months out and 112 down....KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK

I am sorry to hear that your family is not supportive, except your one sister. In time likes this with the changes we are going through a good support group is very important. I also have a friend who even though we still talk she thinks I took the "easy" way out. Sorry there hasn't been anything easy about it. It's just a shame they can't be happy for you and your weight loss. But all that really matters is how you feel about yourself. If you feel good and healthy then hopfully they will come around. If not then I feel bad for them. I am lucky I have 2 sisters one of which will be 2yrs post op in oct and the other who lost like 60lbs with atkins. So they are very supportive and also my mother was 1 year post op in may. I am glad to have the support I have somedays it helps. I guess as long as they aren't coming around be blessed with the sister that does support you. You are doing a great job and as long as you feel better physically and mantally about yourself focus more on that. Stress certainly isn't good for the body...We have put enough on it without adding to it. I hope everything works out for you. Stacy 220/137/120ish

You got to be happy that you done it for yourself............. It does not matter what others think.............. My family does not say much.......... But I know how great I feel now and no one is going to get me down.......... Just hang in there hun.............. You are doing great

Hi Kim, I am so sorry that you are not being positively supported by your family! It makes is so much greater when you are supported by those closest to you and you've known the longest. I have been so lucky, all my friends, co-workers, and family are THRILLED and constantly let me know how wonderful they think I am doing. I think I can honestly say the only negative thing anyone has said to me was my Mom saying that she worried I would regain the weight like I have done before. And that hurt, but I do realize that she means it not to be critical or negative, but as a genuine fear that once I have accomplished this great feat, I can not let my guard down - that it has to be lifelong! And deep down, I think we all fear that, after all, it has happened to all of us to a certain extent, or we wouldn't be wls patients, would we? I can only agree with the others who have replied to you, overlook your siblings and their possible jealousy (you can't change their mindset); instead still love them, listen to your positive friends and co-workers, and talk with your family about other stuff. Like the upcoming elections! Remember, you have an "extended family" here online any time you need us! Keep up the great job you are doing!!!!!! And remember what a friend of mine constantly tells me "Nothing tastes as good as being thin feels!" Sarah