Navigating the WLS Journey with Commitment, Discipline & Consistency
December 9, 2020Navigating My WLS Journey
Think back at the beginning of your WLS journey...Remember those days early in your WLS journey when you proudly posted your before and afters and exclaimed: “70 pounds gone forever!”? You were proud and excited, and dare I say it, feeling like you were invincible! You were pretty sure that your new pouch or sleeve was the key to your long-term success and that it would be just as easy for the next two, five, and ten years to keep moving forward with your WLS Journey.
But then one day you fell off of the perfect pedestal, started making poor choices now and then, got busy with other things and noticed the scale creeping up.
It terrified you. You started to wonder if you were going to be a failure at this. You felt the fear of food taking over again. Maybe you felt stuck.
Whether you are up five pounds, twenty or fifty pounds, the world of regain is a scary place to be. It’s very common that not only are you doubting yourself and feeling like a failure but you’re also possibly feeling broken in both your stomach and in your mind.
I Know. I’ve Been There in My WLS Journey! I’m Just Like You!
I had my surgery in 2006, and I know what it is like to struggle. Like you, I’m not perfect either. I’ve been living this bariatric life for a while now. I went through the first year with a smile on my face and the attitude of a rock star. Like you, it was amazing! I followed the rules the best I could. I made mistakes, but I picked myself up when I fell off track.
I went to every follow-up appointment even when I felt like it was a bit of a waste of time. I went to my support group meetings religiously. I posted before and after pictures on message boards, and I shared them with others, feeling pretty darn proud of myself.
But then I slipped. I slipped big time. I started eating things I had no business eating. Sometimes it was a treat because I “deserved it” after a long hard day at work. Sometimes it was a latte from the local coffee shop to relax. Other times it was chocolate because it was that time of the month. Of course, sometimes it was just fast food because life got busy and meals were on the run.
Somewhere along the line, I forgot that I was a bariatric patient and on my WLS journey. I forgot that those fat cells are very eager to inflate back up. Up went the scale, and at two years out, I found myself with 10 extra pounds. And here’s the funny thing - although I still managed to keep off 140 pounds, I still felt like an absolute failure! Unfortunately, there isn't an elevator to success with WLS.
When someone pointed out how I wasn’t successful because of my regain on a message board, I was absolutely sure that this defined my journey. Then, of course, I beat myself up and put myself down, up came the scale. 10 pounds and quickly became 20 pounds.
When I started planning to have off-program foods, I realized that I needed help. I recognized that I had binge-eating episodes and needed some professional help. I looked for resources in my community and found a free eating disorder program.
At two years post-op, I did small group therapy. It stopped me from gaining and helped me to change my mindset. I needed to deal with some of the underlying issues of why I used food for comfort, happiness, and to relieve boredom. It was helpful but didn’t cure me.
I had to practice the way that I talked to myself, the way I dealt with food, and I needed to find other coping mechanisms for times when I was stressed, bored, and angry.
I held onto that 20 extra pounds for many years. In that time, out came the fad diets. Pouch tests? I did them all. I had short term success. When I fell off the plan, back came the pounds. I did low-carb. Lost 15, gained back 15. I did keto. That was short-lived and resulted in nothing but me hating the food I was eating. I was convinced my metabolism slowed down, and I was forever doomed to never move behind this 20 pounds again.
But I Was Wrong
A year ago this month when I stepped on the scale, I was devastated. 20 pounds was 27 pounds. It was a HUGE wake-up call for me. I needed something. I needed structure. I needed accountability. So, I needed to change the way I thought about regain and about losing regain.
Here’s the thing: I didn’t give myself a time limit this time. I decided I would set a reasonable goal to lose my weight in my own time. I decided that I would focus on HABITS this time rather than solely on the scale.
If I lost .5 to a pound a week and fluctuated, I’d be okay. It wasn’t about being quick. It was about being CONSISTENT. Before that, it was always, “how can I lose my weight the fastest?”
The problem wasn’t my pouch or sleeve. It certainly wasn’t my metabolism.
The Problem Was Me
The problem was that truth be told; I had gotten lax with my habits on my WLS journey. We all do it from time to time! The reality is that often we are good at lying to ourselves. We often lose our way as bariatric patients because we slide from the habits that made us successful in the first place.
So I started logging religiously and realized that although I thought I was eating healthy, I was eating and sometimes drinking almost double of what I should be as a bariatric patient.
I started meal prepping. I’d fallen into the habit of grabbing meals on the go, and that added up on the scale. It was time to begin planning my food, prepping, and portioning. Just like I did my first year.
I limited my coffee house runs and got back to the water. Like I did the first year.
I tried to limit or avoid liquid calories. Like I did the first year.
I focused on whole foods for the bulk of my diet. Protein first. Fewer foods out of boxes. More in the crisper of my refrigerator. Planned foods. No grazing.
One day something magical happened.
The scale started to move.
DOWN!
It crept slowly but consistently. I started to get a handle of what I was supposed to do again. I began to realize that the weight this time was not about my surgery. My surgery did its job 14 years ago.
This time it was all about me, and I had to do all the work. That meant saying NO to treats being offered. It was about having a coffee at the movies instead of popcorn. It meant not having that appetizer before dinner or passing on a piece of cake or donut in the workplace.
I finally realized that I was going to need to decide what was more worth it to me in the long run - giving into every treat and staying where I am —-or saying no, moving on, and deciding that my quest to get on track was more important. Did I deserve the cake, or did I deserve to achieve my goals? It’s all about perspective. Commitment. And yes, discipline.
Right now, I’m at 8 pounds to go. It’s now seven months later, and you’re probably thinking, “you’ve only lost 19 pounds in 7 months?”
Yes, getting off and keeping off regain tends to be a long and arduous process. No quick and easy rewards. Consistency over time. My goal: .5 to 1 pound losses each week.
You will rarely see 3-6 pounds in one week, as you may have experienced over your initial surgical loss. There are seldom “big” payoffs, and that’s why it is so common for those “fighting it” to get discouraged and go back to “give up” mode. Commitment with slow pay off isn’t easy. Motivation is hard to keep up and sustain.
On a WLS journey, you’ll also notice hills and valleys. Gains in between. The body doesn’t always like to keep losing. It wants to preserve itself, and so you’ll see fluctuations happen. You might even have weeks that you struggle. The gains here always represent less than a pound or so, but without thinking about that, you might throw in the towel and say, “this is not working!”
What you don’t see represented in those weight loss numbers are the habits that have changed over the past months, and it would be easy to miss that. A tendency to grab things like fruit, yogurt, vegetables, chicken, hardboiled eggs, and the like for snacks rather than a chocolate bar, sunflower seeds, or granola bars.
What you don’t see is meal prep and managing food options consistently and navigating menus at a restaurant carefully. You don’t see the focus on getting steps in. You don’t see the binges that have been controlled for months or the shorts that are starting to fall down. Pants worn with belts. Or the fact that the clothing options are many now because old pants and shorts fit.
Weight Loss Can Be Slow On A WLS Journey
And because the weight loss is so slow, it is rare for others to notice the weight loss. So very few accolades or comments. You look, “like you.” The motivation has to become internal. Your healthy lifestyle after bariatric surgery has to be about wanting to be in control of food and wanting to do this for YOU!
You have it in you! Every trait within you exists if you want to strive to work on regain.
Commitment. Discipline. Consistency.
The best takeaway that I can offer to you for your WLS journey is: It’s going to be hard. It’s going to be slow. But it’s going to be worth it.
 | ABOUT THE AUTHOR Dawn Rudling Stefani had surgery in 2006 and has been an avid member of ObesityHelp since her pre-op days. Her OH username is “Diminishing Dawn.” She is an advocate and a strong supporter of the weight loss community, runs her local support group, and is an elementary school teacher. She is very active in weight loss surgery groups on Facebook and enjoys making new acquaintances with other WLS patients. Read more articles from Dawn! |
