Celebrating a Non-Scale Victory–Dressing with Style, Fashion, and Fun
August 17, 2015James' struggle with his weight goes back all the way to his childhood. Food did not come freely at home so when the opportunity presented itself, he had to take it. As a child, he learned to eat even when he wasn't hungry. Food was a nice form of escape from things going on around him. James started overeating when he was eight years old, and lost his mother in a very tragic way. He started shutting down and his only comfort was found in food. James shares that he needed to find something to fill the void deep down inside of him. His childhood was full of pain and loss. People find different ways of dealing with their feelings, even for a short period of time, but his was through food for a long period of time.
James was known as the ‘fat kid’ at school as well as by members of his own family. When his doctor told him that he was too large, that started his cycle of diet after diet, and many weight loss medications that would continue for many years. From his teenage years and mid-20's, while his peers were out at parties, clubs, taking trips, and having fun, James was at home, locked away with the television and food as his familiar friend. James recalls feeling so alone, unwanted, and lost. However, he now sees there were people that walked in and out of his life that wanted to help but he didn't see it. Now, James realizes that when a person is so unhappy in their life that it isn't until the person sees it, accepts it and wants to do something to change it that their life can be turned around.
James believed he was always going to be a morbidly obese man who truly hated himself from head to toe. He had every mirror in his home taken down or covered with a sheet so he didn't have to look at himself. James knew he needed, and wanted, to change his life in some way, but had no idea how to do that.
In an attempt to change his life, James moved to a larger area for a fresh start. He believed that by moving, the weight would come off and change his outlook on the world. It didn't take very long before he discovered that running away from problems didn’t not take them away, and in fact, only added to them. By moving to a larger area, James met people in the city had everything he always wanted. Yet again, he felt as though he had missed-out on life. To cope and comfort himself, James started eating even more to help with the loneliness and isolation. One life-changing day, James woke up and looked into the bathroom mirror and saw a thirty-year old man looking back at him pleading “find a reason to live or end this life because this has truly not been a life worth living”. That was a transformational day where James started his weight loss surgery research and eventual surgery.
At age 31, weighing 326 lbs, James made the decision to have Lap-Band surgery on December 29, 2010 with Dr. Brandon Roy of WakeMed Physician Practices. Since then, James has lost 142 lbs, 16 inches in his waist and his shirt size has changed from a XXXL to a medium!
With life perceptions changed and a new shirt size,
James went on to accomplish a major NSV!
Beyond the scale and his clothing size changes, surgery changed James' life in many positive ways – it allowed him to see himself differently, and learn to start loving himself on the outside as well as on the inside. His Non-Scale Victory (NSV) may sound simple enough to most people but for James, at one point in his life it seemed unattainable. Growing up, he was always the chunky kid that grew into the hefty young teen, and later became an overweight man. Since James was "chunky," everything came with a higher price tag so he was only allowed to shop the off brand clothing line or wear hand-me-downs. He'd always dreamt of being able to wear anything he wanted!
At James' consultation with his surgeon, Dr. Brandon Roy of WakeMed Physician Practices, asked James, "What is something you would like to see happen from with this surgery?".
James jokingly replied, "I have always wanted to walk into a name brand store and just be able to feel comfortable, even if it was only a pair of socks!"
Dr. Roy smiled and said, "Then let's make it happen!".
One year, almost to the day of James having Lap-Band surgery, he walked into an Abercrombie & Fitch store for the very first time, picked up a shirt and decided it was time to try it. To his shock, it fit just right and he shares that he was such a good looking man wearing it. Just to know what it felt like to put on a nice new name brand style of clothing, and feel good wearing it, was such a huge moment for him. James cried tears of joy right in the dressing room. He'd finally done it, that day was a huge Non-Scale Victory that James will never forget!
Only a few day's after trying on the clothes, James had his one-year post-op follow up with Dr. Roy. Just like a little kid with a new toy, James was so excited and wanted to show off his new shirt, yet he wanted to make it a surprise of sorts for Dr. Roy and his staff. James placed a patch over the wording and emblems on the shirt making it look almost like a forgotten name tag and walked into the office. James recalls that he will never forget the look on their faces, especially Dr. Roy and his wonderful nurse, Carol, when he turned around pulling off the patch revealing the logo and wording. They congratulated James on reaching one of his goals, and in turn, James shared his thanks and appreciation to all of them for supporting him on his weight loss surgery journey.
Since that amazing NSV, James has gone on to wear many different name brands, finding Express to be the top of the list for him. James shares that now he finds himself smiling more, going out with friends, and over all, living a life he only dreamed of before his weight loss surgery. Another special NSV is ahead for James at the #OH2015 National Conference in Cary, NC when struts down the catwalk of the Fashion Show!
"When you find your happy, run with it" ~James Habourn
 | ABOUT THE AUTHOR Cathy Wilson, PCC, BCC, had RNY surgery in 2001 and lost 147 pounds. Cathy is a regular contributor to the OH Blog and authored the "Mind Matters" column in ObesityHelp Magazine. Cathy is a licensed pilot and loves flying. She is a member of the American Society for Metabolic and Bariatric Surgery (ASMBS) and the Obesity Action Coalition (OAC).Read more articles by Cathy! |
