Question:
Gulp. I told a little white lie...

To my boss when I initially decided to have WLS. I told her I was going to need surgery for my jaw (I was having jaw issues at the time and I thought WLS might seem frivilous.) Now I'm in the process of pre-op testing/insurance approval and am taking off days here and there for all that. I've told her that the surgery I am having is experimental and that insurance may not cover it, but I have been very evasive...the problem is, she's asking a lot of questions (out of concern) and I am a lousy liar...any hints on how to deal with this now, and once I start (hopefully) losing dramatic amounts of weight? We have a good rapport, but I am sure she would be upset with me knowing that I initially lied about the nature of the surgery. Can I be fired for this? I am terrified of that...    — [Anonymous] (posted on February 8, 2002)

February 8, 2002
No, you can't be fired for this. You aren't obligated to disclose personal medical info to your boss. But, you are in a bit of a pickle here. I would clear the air and tell her (confidentially) the truth. Why not? You aren't breaking any laws and she obviously know that you have a weight problem. Tell her that you were a bit embarrassed and told a "white lie" and you'd like her to keep your true surgery confidential. Then (if I were you) tell other people in the office that you are having some gastrointestinal surgery. It won't be a lie!
   — [Anonymous]

February 8, 2002
If I were you, I would take my boss into my confidence and tell her I am trusting her with my secret. Lies can snowball. If anyone else asks, smile sweetly and say "its personal".
   — JoanneML

February 8, 2002
It is so much easier to tell the truth. Lies make you feel guilty (if you have morals) and you have to keep track of what you're telling people. Good luck and God Bless!
   — Kimberly L.

February 8, 2002
Fortunately, I have a boss who doesn't like to know information, but I have others in the office that are gossips. I have been at my job for a year, and there was already a confidentiality break concerning my salary. I have to put in Papers for my short term disability benefits, and the assistant to our HR director is one of the biggest gossips and was part of the salary confidentiality break. In my opionion its No one's business. So I have put my papers on the HR's directors desk ( he will get them monday) with a note that I would like him to handle this personally, that I dont want to be the topic of discussion in the office. Oh and btw.. the HR assistant is dying to find out what type of surgery Im having she's constantly asking questions, and I tell her I would rather not discuss it. So if you are feeling bad about lying to your boss, take her aside and tell her that you are not having jaw surgery, but the type of surgery you are having you don't wish to discuss. Apologize for lying but tell her when she asked you weren't prepared for to answer that question
   — Diane Rhoads

February 8, 2002
I told my boss and co workers the truth about what surgery I was having done. I was a little nervous about being open about the procedure mainly because everyone has a "horror" story and I didn't want to hear them..but I was very surprised. I had wonderful support from my boss and my teammates at work. They were wonderful thru the surgery and my time off of work and now that I am back to work, they are even more supportive. If you trust your boss and have a good rapport with him/her...then I say, tell the truth. You might be surprised at the support you receive. Good Luck!!
   — Jaynismile

February 11, 2002
I work in a small dental office and have found that being truthful is the best way. These people will be a mainstay of your support as you see them everyday for hours. Utilize any support you can get.........be open and honest and ask them to protect your privacy. It works for me.
   — Caren S.