Question:
Is there a support group for sposes of potential patients?
My husband is having concerns and doubts where can I send him for info and reassurance? — missicakes (posted on March 15, 2006)
March 15, 2006
Melissa, You can take him with you to your WL meetings. The support meeting
are great and you can take your support team with you. I went to my first
one this past Monday and I took my 11 year old son. He has worried about me
having the surgery. He asked me last week, "What will happen to me if
something happens to you?" (I am not kidding about this) After the
meeting he looked at me and said, "You are going to be just like that
lady soon and everything is going to be fine!"
It made it all worth wild!
Sheila
— Sheila_E
March 15, 2006
My husband had and still has (I'm pre-op) some concerns and he is going to
my next support group meeting with me and hopefully this will help. I have
been trying to talk to him about all the things I want to do as a couple or
family once I feel better and have more energy.
— Tanya1992
March 15, 2006
Melissa,
Take him on your appointments and to your support group meetings, the more
understanding that he has of the surgery and what to expect the better he
can support you during your recovery. Sometimes they offer WL conferences
and if you can attend one of those with him that's the best way that he can
learn about the surgery and what the risk are. Good luck on your journey.
Denise
— dlryanoates
March 15, 2006
Melissa,
I lead a local support group meeting for people who go to my surgeon (Dr.
Aniceto Baltasar), and we encourage people to bring their support people
with them - at least once! Once they get there and meet all of the
post-ops - and are totally blown away by the fact that these people were
once where their loved one is - perspectives change pretty quickly!
Inviting your husband to be a part of the journey is a pretty awesome
thing. My husband was one of those wonderfully supportive guys from very
early out. He was positive that he would never go the surgery route, but
was 100% behind me and willing to support me in every way possible. It was
pretty cool, 2 years to the day after my own surgery, that I got to be HIS
support person for his surgery!
This can become a really positive part of your marriage. Just remember to
invite your husband to be a part of the process! Verbalize the stuff
you're thinking and feeling to him. Let him know how much you love him and
need him to be a part of this!
My surgeon is known to say to couples before surgery: if you have a strong
marriage, this will make it stronger. If you don't, there could be trouble
ahead. Decide now how important this relationship is to you - and work on
it!
Blessings,
dina
— Dina McBride
March 15, 2006
Take him with you. Suggest he sign up for this site (as my partner
suggested I do). Tell him there are more successes than failures. Every
once in a while the Discovery Health Channel will show a panel discussion
on WLS and it's very informative as well.
— the7thdean
March 15, 2006
the spose's forum here on oh,
— walter A.
March 15, 2006
Fortunately, my bariatric group has a special support group for family
members. Howeer, when I was only in the "deciding" stage, I took
my husband with me to an informational meeting and it wasn't so much what
the surgeon said but what the post opers said in the "sharing
time" that reassured him. Try to get your concerned family members to
an informational or support group meeting....they will probably still be
anxious for your decision but at least they will be more knowledgable of
the procedure.
— Luvitsunny
March 16, 2006
Hi!
I know what you mean. I wasnt married, divorced, at the time of my surgery,
but needless to say I had to give my ex husband and children assurance.
08/03 is when I had mine. all I can say, is you two, sit at the computer
and go through before and after photos. That is what helped my kids, and
read peoples stories. Yes, there are horror stories, but by all means, it
is the BEST thing that I have ever done in my life. I do have a profile on
here. Feel free to use me as an example. Good Luck, Crystal Yeast,
Galesburg, IL. 272/133
— lippyblonde2000
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