Question:
Why some people think when you go gastric bypass that what i am having. You didnt try other diets wi

   — griffith (posted on November 30, 2006)


November 30, 2006
People say things for different reasons. The big thing is you need to make the decision for yourself. I am 13.5 weeks out and my mother-in-law and lots of co-workers were like that and I finally had to start telling people "be happy for me and pray". My MIL was so against it that we had to tell her that unless she could be supportive she wasn't welcome in our house because I needed only positive people around me. I am 82lbs down and had no complications but she still doesn't think I did the right thing. As long as you and you imed. family are okay then that is all that matters. Good Luck and God Bless! Amy
   — Lost4Ever

November 30, 2006
Kathie, I went through the very same thing when family and friends found out I wanted to have the gastric bypass. I even had one lady ( who I thought was a friend) calling and telling me I was selfish and that I didn't love my kids because I was risking death.But ,I told myself that if I didn't have the surgery I would end up dieing anyway. So the risk I was willing to take was based on love for my family and finally for myself I would rather die trying to be an active member in my kids life that to be suffering every day of my life with obesity issues and die miserable. People don't see what pain we suffer on the inside,or how lonely and miserable we become. If people thought that I was being selfish for wanting the surgery then it was the first time in my life that I had been selfish and I deserved it. I just wanted to live a happy productive life and today I'm 118 pounds lighter and I feel great. I've even returned to school to finish my bachelors degree in criminal justice. I'm 32 years old and I'm happy, healthy, and can keep up with my kids 15 and 7. If you want this, do it for yourself. I'll be praying for you and for your family.
   — stephandtim

November 30, 2006
Hello Kathie, I do hope that your not letting all this stress you out! Until these people do the research and learn all that we have learned about this surgery, then they simply have no idea what their talking about. Do not pay them much attention. If you have made a sound decision to have the WLS and you feel it is the right decision for you, then go with it. Fortunately I had all postive reinforment. There is only a select few that I have not told that I had the surgery, not because I care if they know, but because I (we) don't owe anybody anything! And furthermore the death rate is not that high, again, they do not have their facts in order. If you feel this is the best thing for you, then by all means, have the surgery. Only you can make this very IMPORTANT decision. Best of luck and may you find peace in all of this! Jean
   — Jean N.

November 30, 2006
Ditto for all that has been said. As you get further along in your recovery you are going to see that this was not an easy choice. You will have to keep up with your vitamins, protein intake, doctor appt., and exercise. You will need to keep an eye on what you eat, how much, and in my case why. We all got a great tool but if we abuse it it will do no good. You will always need to be careful about what you eat for all kinds of reasons i.e. fat, sugar, empty calories, mindless eating, etc. This is an everyday effort with big rewards if you have done your research and follow your recovery protocol. You will also see that your friends who are heavy will treat you different and generally you will get treated different once you lose weight. You are the one that looks in the mirror every day and has to live with the decision and outcome not those people giving you reasons NOT to improve your life. Being overweight all of my life listening to someone who struggles with 20 lbs. to lose doesn't really & can't really understand. I am down 130 lbs. and working at losing another 30 lbs. it has been 16 months for me. I would recommend it to anyone as long as they know what is involved. Best of Luck it will be the best ride of your life. :) :)
   — 1968 Loser

November 30, 2006
Kathy, Please think about your family. They are important to you, right? I was told that if I didnt have the surgery done I was not going to be here with in four years. I am now almost 5 years out and have maintained a well over a 100 pound weight loss. I went from taking so many pills for high blood pressure( nine of them) (200mg of insulin, and 2 1000mg glucophage) plus all my other meds. I now only take one small pill for diabetes, and one for High blood pressure. I am so much healthier now. I weighed 330 and now weigh 179-180 depending on the day and what I have eaten. I will pray for you to be able to come through that surgery like I did and you will be so happy that you are finally on the other side and sliding down to a slimmer you and your children will be happy to. Good luck and God Bless you.
   — Sherrie S.

November 30, 2006
i have the same problem. im very sensitive to this as well. what people say, really effect me emotionally. tell them your having surgery to SAVE your life. if you needed a hysterectomy, you would have one, right? people can be very judgemental. i wish i never told people. but its my fault and now i have to hear their wrath. try not to let it bother you and beware of who you tell. it's really none of their business. don't talk about it anymore with people who don't understand. good luck.
   — DDBEAR458

November 30, 2006
Know this, as with ANY surgery, there is a risk of death mainly because of the anesthesia. However, most insurances now make you go through a great deal of approvals -- breath test, stress test, echocardiogram, etc...to make sure everything will be as good as it can be during the surgery. Don't worry about what others say...do this for YOURSELF, and tell anyone that doesn't support you, to go to....LOL you know where...good luck!
   — crystalsno

November 30, 2006
Kathie, Its called FEAR. My oldest sister is about 5'4 and has been overweight all her life and now the doctor tells her she has to have a knee replaced. The cartlidge hasn't worn away from the knee, its OUTSIDE the knee. I told her she might want to consider the surgery and get that weight off her knees -- she balks. When I told her I'd been approved for the surgery and set a date -- she wasn't thrilled --although I'd told her I was planning on having it months before. Its just fear. We are so used to people being overweight in my family that now someone is going to change it and they are afraid. I'm excited, I'm elated, can't wait for Janaury 18th -- but I have to. Proceed with your plans -- ask your family the question what if I don't have the surgery and still can't be there for my 3 children. Point is, you will be there, with, and for your 3 children.
   — the7thdean

November 30, 2006
Oh the FEAR:( Over 5 years ago I decided to have WLS, my wife a RN wasnt happy:( My best friend thought I was suicidal:(........... IT WAS THE BEST DECISION OF MY ENTIRE LIFE!!! You can do it too!
   — bob-haller

November 30, 2006
Kathie, I wish you the best with your surgery. I am scheduled for mine Dec. 19. I have decided to have this for my health and so that I can grow old with my children and grandchildren. Also, so that I can enjoy life while living it and not sitting on the sidelines being an observer. I was hesitant telling some people. But I have been one of the lucky ones to have support of my family and many of my friends. When I would tell the people that I was hesitant telling, you could tell by the look on their faces what they were thinking. I know I did not need to defend myself, but I wanted them to realize this was not a decision I had made over night. I would ask them, what are you thinking? With all the research I have done, and by attending support groups, etc. I was quite often able to answer their question. I would tell them there are pros and cons to this. I guess I felt I needed to educate them. I also have a friend that her sister had the surgery nearly 5 years ago. She had lost 180 pounds. She has gained back 170. When I told my friend I was having the surgery, she said I certainly hope it works better for you than it did for my sister. I asked her why she said that. She said that her sister has been stopping at McDonald's every night on the way home from work. Eating what she ordered in the car, and then when she gets home, she makes another meal for her daughter and herself. I told her, that is not the WLS fault that is her sisters doing. I also said this is not an answer to all your problems. If you had emotional issues before WLS, you still need to seek help for those. I actually feel I did get through to her. One thing I noticed about your question, you received so many responses. I read these questions and responses on a daily basis, and really don't recall another question getting this many responses. Sure looks like we have all had this issue, doesn't it!! Again, best of luck to you.
   — MJP0520

November 30, 2006
hi Kathie. Some people just don't understand the things obese people have gone through. Just remember that you are doing this for you - for your health. Always remember that you are the only one you need to please. I still have people who turn up their nose when they find out I had WLS. I feel no need to explain myself - I simply say I did it for my health so I can watch my children grow up and have children of their own. I was 325 when I started a year and 6 months ago and I am 150 today. I wish you all the best of luck. - Shannon
   — theroses03

December 1, 2006
People are ignorant and misinformed. all we can do is correct their false assumptions.
   — Novashannon

December 1, 2006
How did I diet? Let me count the ways...... When a few inconsiderate souls asked, "How did you get that big?", I look 'em straight in the eye and tell them, "Dieting." We all can recite the diets we've been on, and looking back, did you quit the diet or did it quit you? I can see some I trashed, but a couple of the big ones, well, I kept doing what I was doing, but the weight came back ANYWAY. Makes us think we're crazy, lazy, character flawed and just bad people. And that's not true.
   — vitalady

December 1, 2006
Kathie, Don't you know. We took the Easy Way Out.......I'm two years Post Op and I'm still waiting for it to get EASY. : )
   — smparker2




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