Question:
Can't quit eating

I am on the 6 month diet that my insurance requires. I can't quit eating. Its like I know in a few months I will never get to eat again and I am freaking out, I just eat and eat, what can I do. I'm suppose to go back to Dr. next week and I ain't lost a pound.    — pugsley101 (posted on July 4, 2008)


July 3, 2008
I also had to do the six month diet, but didn't lose any weight either. The insurance company didn't care, they just wanted it recorded that I was dieting under doctor supervision. My insurance approved me, even though I weighed more after the six months.
   — loisdierlam

July 4, 2008
If you really want to try to lose some weight before, you could try using a calorie and exercise tracking program on line. I use "myplate.com" and find it very encouraging as well as promoting accountability. At the same time, you are blowing your future out of proportion. You will really never stop eating, The week of surgery you will be taking fluids like jello, broth, popcycles, tea etc. and progress from there. You will, on the other hand, be eating a lot less. And isn't that what it's all about? Eating healthy foods in healthy amounts. Does this mean you will never, ever have another treat in your life? NO. It means those occasional treats will be small and it may mean they are low fat and sugar free. I found some low fat sugar free ice cream for 80 calories per 1/2 cup. Also, check out eggface's page and see what kind of neat new recipes you can be trying. Try some now to see what you like best and can look forward to after surgery. Don't you deserve a more active, attractive physical you to go with the lovely, sweet, fun to be with already you? I think so, and deep down, so do you. Don't take your focus off food. Challenge yourself to see if you can find low fat, high nutrient dense versions of things you already love. Example: 2 scrambled eggs with cheese change to: in non stick pan on low heat, one egg scrambled, 1 slice Fat Free cheddar cheese, 1/4 cup salsa. Very yummy. You can do this. Do not get on the scale. Drink 4 bottles of water every day and make better food choices for life. It's a free choice. No one is forcing you. PM me if you want to vent. Laura
   — waterlover

July 4, 2008
Think "VERY " carefully about surgery then. I know of three people that were turned down from the psych doctor because they were honest about their eating urges and that they were told that they were not ready for this major surgery. If you can't stop eating now, you will not be able to make this big change after very well. I hope you will seriously consider looking into your eating habit and see if you are truly ready for this surgery. Eating like it is your last meal each day is not good, it will be a battle that will be enormous for you. I wish you the best and hope that you are able to go forward with your surgery.
   — usfour

July 4, 2008
Perhaps the "good-bye" cermony is the hardest part of the pre-op process. I honestly binged and put everything on the line to say good-bye to my best friend food. Now that I look back, 4 1/2 years later, I can still have those things I thought I would never be able to eat again, just in moderation and using self-control. Don't say good-bye, just say, 'til we meet again! Good luck.
   — bariatricdivalatina

July 4, 2008
My Sergeon cared and he was very good about listening and he also was great about helping me take off the weight to get the fat off my kidneys so the surgery went easier. Just be honest, and they will guide you. That is why they are in the profession they are in.
   — William (Bill) wmil

July 4, 2008
The 6th month pre op diet was one of the hardest things I ever had to do. But..I looked at it this way.. I hated the way I felt inside and out and cringed looking in the mirror, I did the 6 months but only lost a few pounds. It's not that you can never eat again... it's just a different way of eating choosing healthier foods, smaller portions, and like the others said think long and hard about this. make sure it is what you really want. You're welcome to email me anytime! We're all here for you!
   — Danielle T.

July 4, 2008
It not easy, and it won't b easy after WLS you might want to get better control before you hurt yourself It just not that easy Belive me I Know!! best of luck
   — phatkatz

July 4, 2008
First of all you MUST stop thinking of this as a diet. You have to make your mind up to a life style change. Without making this change and accepting it in your mind, you'll always be on a diet.....and we know diets DON'T WORK! Diets are how you and I got here in the first place. Follow the your instructor's suggestions and advice. Stop drinking coffee, if you must, DECAFE! Stop drinking soda, all kinds, including DIET! Look at the fat content of what you're eating...no more then 25% Look at the sugar content Eat protein first, always Complexe carbs second Cut out BREAD, PASTA, RICE...all types, whole grain or not. If you have to eat pizza, eat the topping, give the rest to the dog. Make it a Vegetarian Pizza. Mac and cheese....have a piece or two of string cheese and take your time. NO SUGAR!!!!!! Use Splenda instead. Simple Carbs are your worst enemy. You eat bread and all you want is more bread, think about it. If your Diabetic, do you really need those carbs if you're not, DO YOU REALLY NEED THOSE THOSE CARBS. All they do is make you hungry! And Raise your blood sugar and then cause a sudden and severe DROP IN YOUR BLOOD SUGAR! Then you're hungry, again. Bread, pasta and rice....no, no, no! If you need a snack, try a Protein Bar. I use South Beach, phase 2 & 3. About cravings. Here's what I did. My classes were on Monday. That day for lunch or dinner I would get something I was craving or thought I would miss after surgery. EVERY MONDAY, I fulfilled a craving. Every day read a self book. I used "The Secret" and I still do. Daily, at least 15 minites a day. I lost 55 pounds pre - opp and that's how I did it My total loss is 141 pounds, surgery was 1/18/2008 Hope this helps. My story in "People" user name is "moterman" Good luck in your endevors, check out my story and God's Speed on our journey. Bob....aka moterman
   — moterman

July 4, 2008
Hi Carla, You're pretty stressed out right now, right? Take a deep breath and let it out. Do that a few times. do it every time you start to feel those urges. I fight cravings/urges every day--almost every minute sometimes so I know how you feel. I'm right in the middle of the two month "diet" required by my surgeon. This may be a bit different than yours. I don't know what the insurance company requires of you--maybe as the other poster says, it doesn't matter if you lose weight to satisfy the insurance company. My diet is to teach me how to eat after the surgery. Certainly, you can ask your health care team about this. Perhaps the answer will make you feel a little better. But if your personal motivation is to lose a bit of weight before the surgery and to teach yourself the healthy eating habits we're going to need after the surgery, then there are a few things you may want to do/try. I can only tell you what's working for me right now. I don't know about you but my problem has been not only the cravings--but the HUNGER. At first I wasn't getting enough food and the hunger was driving me to distraction! I know from all the other diets I've ever been on that this is always the problem: I start to feel DEPRIVED--either because I'm hungry, or because of the list of "no-no" foods--the stuff I'm not allowed to have. Is this what you have been feeling? Feelings of deprivation is the ONE thing that ALWAYS, GUARANTEED, messed me up on all the other diets in the past. Here's what I suggest: First, sit yourself down and have a talk with yourself. Tell yourself you are never going to use that "D" word (Diet) ever again. It's not a "D" it's a new way of relating to food. Food is no longer my drug of choice to medicate myself or calm myself or comfort myself. I'm in the process of finding other activities to calm me--knitting might be helping a bit. I'm also swimming 3 or 4 days a week and walking what little I can. Next, examine your feelings. Are you feeling hungry? I mean is your stomach growling like you haven't had enough to eat? There are two things that helped me--I've pretty much stopped eating any carbs--no potatoes, no rice, no bread. These things are triggers for me (comfort/drug) and they affect my blood sugar in a way that makes me hungry about 20 minutes after I eat---even if I know my stomach is full. The only carbs I eat are really whole grain stuff--All Bran Bars are helping there--within the eating plan. Next thing--I got some advise from people here to add some whey isolate protein drinks to my diet--in place of a snack or whatever. There are other pages on this site devoted to explaining all about the the protein shakes. The idea is not to substitute them for all your food, but to add them in a little--to make you stomach feel SATISFIED. I can't tell you how much this has helped. I nearly cried the first day when i realized I wasn't hungry! I'm having a shake for breakfast most weekday/work mornings. Usually with some fruit in it. I'm also packing a lunch bag with lot's of little snack things--cheese strings, individual servings of yogurt, baby carrots, cut up fruit, etc. If I don't let myself get too hungry in between meals, I don't tend to go crazy late in the day. The whole thing is really difficult to wrap your head around, I know. Some of what I'm telling you hear was completely foreign and even foolish sounding to me a few months ago, but it's working. Even though I "cheated" like crazy that 1st couple weeks, I lost 7 lbs for the month. I wish you all the best. Keep coming back here. The support I've gotten here has helped me more than I could have imagined. Cheers. I don't know what kinds of food you are drawn too but I do know that starting about 2-3 years ago, I stopped drinking all soda drinks. In the US they are full of high fructose corn syrup which is absolute poison. It makes you crave more of whatever you are eating at the time. Diet sodas aren't any better. I stopped having almost everything with transfat in it. If the label says "hydrogenated" anything, I just consider it a POISON, and I put it down. That one resolution has kept many, many packages of cookies and cakes from landing my my cart! I haven't stopped drinking coffee entirely but I've cut way, way back. By the time of my surgery I should be almost completely decaffeinated. If you do need to kick caffeine, I strongly suggest doing it in stages! It's rough! I did it cold turkey once (snowed in) and did nothing but lay on the sofa with a screaming headache for about 4 days! Go slow!
   — Tina G.

July 5, 2008
I don't have an answer as to what you can do because I am in the exact same spot!!!! I'm on the 6 month diet and have my second appointment with the dietician next week and I haven't lost anything. I have made a lot of small changes in my diet which include adding in some good foods (grilled/baked salmon, low-carb bread, light, low-fat yogurt), getting three to four sevings of fruits/veggies, and increasing water intake. I have also cut back on drive-thru dinners. It used to be about four times a week, now it's been maybe four times in the last month. I am also getting some sort of activity in every day, even if it's just a 15 minute walk; I used to never get any activity in except whatever my daily routine required of me, like walking from the parking garage into work. I can live with these changes, and I don't feel deprived. Granted, I haven't lost any weight, but I'm trying to think of this 6 month period as a time to slowly change eating and excercise habits. It's also a time to explore new food options that are really healthy choices -- it's amazing how good some of these foods are. I'm trying to just make better choices when I can. Last night after the fireworks, our family went for ice cream. Rather than the giant chocolatey ooey gooey sundae concoction, I had a vanilla cone instead. Not the best thing to put in my mouth, but it's a better choice for now. Maybe later on down the road, I can choose something better than the vanilla cone, but for now it is a choice I can make and not feel deprived. On the other hand, I am still really struggling with constantly wanting to eat. If I'm not busy and I'm at home, I can't stop thinking about what I might go ahead and eat. The evenings are the scariest. I am really struggling with that "last time" mentality where I tell myself to go ahead and eat something because before long I am making a big change and I won't be eating this or doing this after my surgery. I eat and eat some days and I just never feel satisfied, even though I know I have eaten enough and should not feel hungry. I am so embarrassed about having to go see the dietician and weigh in with no weightloss. At one point this month, I was down 6 lbs, now I've gained it back. I just feel so out of control!!! I think it's important to focus on whatever good things you have done over the last month (one good thing you've done is you are seeking advice and admitting your problem), try to stay positive, and just move forward. I'm not sure what your history is, but for me, I have been overweight for about 25 out of my 31 years of life, so it's no surprise this last month hasn't been my ticket to weightloss. I've also realized that I'm addicted to food. I mean, how embarrassing! But it's true. Food is my drug of choice. I am actually thankful I have this 6 months to think about why I eat, what I'm getting out of food, and what I can do to gain control of myself and my eating habits. It wouldn't be realistic to send a heroin addict to one counseling session and expect her to walk out and kick the habit for life, and I don't think it's realistic for me, either, when it comes to food. In fact, a food addiction is really tough because it's not like food is strictly off limits; I still need to have some of it. The "drug" has to remain part of my life, but I have to learn to control it. Long story short -- don't beat yourself up. Be honest with your doctor and go from there. If you had all the answers, you wouldn't be in need of wls. You have 5 months to prepare for this major change, and you can do it! Please know you are not alone, and thanks for your post. Good luck to you!
   — wenniewo

July 5, 2008
I had the exact opposite reaction. I am taking that time to make sure I will be able to stick with the guidelines AFTER surgery. I know that if I cant lose weight on my own before my surgery - then I may not be ready mentally. It will be a life-long mindset and I know I have to be accountable for losing this weight on my own in order to reduce the fat in my liver AND show myself I can do this NOW and AFTER surgery. I have cut out all carbonated beverages, eating smaller portions (but eating the things I like) and I have lost 17 pounds in the last 2 months. Take this time to test yourself because if your not in the right mindset, the life-long results may be the opposite of what youre hoping for. Good Luck!
   — Rhonda C.

July 5, 2008
Carla, what you are experiencing is quite as you describe. You are freaking out about food. The problem is this, it will also happen after surgery as well as now. If you won't get a hold of it now in some fashion, then it will be even tougher for you to lose once the surgery happens. We love to lie to ourselves about food. The only thing you say that is not true is that you "can't" quit eating. You can. You just won't. We have a stubborn will and lust for food. You are on the brink of facing that. Face it and fight it, it is a DAILY battle you must face, but if you do now, you can also after surgery and you can win. The choice is yours, you CAN stop yourself, it is just truly very hard. Take care. Patricia P.
   — Patricia P

July 5, 2008
First of all, you will be able to eat after WLS I think this is a big misconception. You can eat but not as much and not the foods that got you fat in the first place. I have had a lot of people ask me if I miss certain foods and I can say what I don't miss is being out of breath when I walk a few blocks. I don't miss my joints hurting at the end of the day because I had so much extra weight putting pressure on them, I don't miss not fitting into an airline seat, or not being able to go to a sporting event because all I can think about is walking up too many stairs. I know before surgery it's hard not to focus on the food...but try and focus on all the ways your life is limited and controlled by food, and what freedom you will have when that ball and chain is gone from your life. I think you are very normal, and a lot of people struggle with what you are feeling. But be honest with your doctor, they are there to help you. You will do great...just do your best!
   — wandajomorgan

July 5, 2008
I hear some extreme thinking in your words. To say that you will never EAT again is not true. You will continue to eat but it will be smaller portions and you will learn to eat to live, not live to eat...You may not be perect and you may relapse with your choices at times but what you first need to decide is the reasn you are choosing to lose weight and have surgery. If your goal is to just get thin or because others are telling you that you should, then you may need to consider the reasons eating better no matter how much wieght you lose will do for your body. Any addictive behavior takes time to change whether it is gradule or immediate. Seek support groups in your area and/or start meeting with a therapist but remember too that this is an addiction and understanding where you are coming from and why you have not been able to stop can be the start. Just remember that giving uo any addiction will take time for your mind and body to adjust. Just start and seek the support. It takes a few weeks to overcome some of the emotions such as frustration and even depression as we learn to give up food as our primary support and seek alternative means...Good luck to you and remember just starting is the hardest part, but it does get easier.
   — pjlewis1

July 5, 2008
Hi Carla, you won't believe how the replies to your situation have helped me. I'm just beginning my quest forward to wls and have first app't on July 31 in Rochester, NY. I am furiously trying to change the idea that I'll never have this or that again and I am eliminating Diet coke gradually. Keep in touch. Marguerite
   — msmugs

July 5, 2008
Great news, your world of eating is not coming to an end, it is just going to change course. You have the same feelings as a lot of WLS patients. I recommend that you try to think positive about food, look at foods that are good for you, protiens, stay away from the the carbs. and talk to your Dr's . Good thinks will come. Good Luck
   — Ira Sansolo

July 5, 2008
I Love Maria Sanchez's response to your question! I just had my open RNY on June 26th (a little over a week ago), and I have to say, watching my husband and son eating some of my favorite things has been difficult, but it is good to know that we're not saying "goodbye forever" to all of the foods we used to eat, we just have to watch our portion control, and make better choices. What you are feeling right now is what we all go through. We feel like we have to get it all in before we have our surgery. I lost 40 pounds during my 12 months with the dietician, but gained back 28 lbs of what I lost. My Dr. never mentioned it, and my dietician didn't scold me. They know that we are at this point because we have not been able to lose it and keep it off in the past. I am now 10 days post op and have already lost 21 pounds. Good luck on your journey and try not to stress to much, we are all here for you! Blessings, Vicki
   — Jrsmomi

July 6, 2008
I gained three pound during the pre-op phase and the nutritionist told me it is called the "last supper" mentality. As soon as she pointed out what I was doing, I was able to rephrase thoughts in my mind and tell myself that my relationship with food is changing, but I am just postponing eating some of these foods...not giving up anything (except carbonation). Anyway, I started to lose again before my surgery. My Dr. will cancel surgery if you gain before hand and that also motivated me because I was ready to make these changes in my life. I truly want to outlive my dogs, be able to do my own pedicures (reach my own feet), wipe myself the way I did when I was younger and have good energy to be active. I had surgery on June 19 and I am feeling stronger and have more energy each day. I have not been hungry at all and have to keep a list to make sure I get in all my protein, H2O and exercise. I feared I would not be able to stop thinking about food and the surgery has been a God send. I believe it is all about attitude and my glass is at least half full! Good luck.
   — pathnb

July 7, 2008
You WILL eat again. In fact, in a year after surgery, after learning your new anatomy and what you can and cannot tolerate and how to eat slowly and drink lots of water, etc....You can then begin adding things back into your daily life and eat like a normal small person as a way of life and not as a diet....If you ever, during your journey begin to go off track, you force yourself to resort back to diets because you WILL gain weight if you abuse the rules. The way you eat for a year post op is the way you should eat for the rest of your life. You can't do it now because you think this is the end of food...It's not....I'm 4 1/2 years out and I eat like a regular person should eat. I can go to a restaurant and order a meal and eat 1/4 to 1/2 of it and take the rest home for lunch the next day! The difference between now and then is that I don't want to put useless calories in my body (or drink any calories at all!) ...I eat to live rather than live to eat. Eating healthy is a habit that FEELS SOOOOO RIGHT! I won't order fried chicken, biscuits and gravy with a big fat brownie and ice cream and chocolate syrup. Now I order a lean fish or chicken... sandwich wrap...a side salad with vinegarette dressing, and the veggie of the day and there's just no room for dessert. If hubby orders dessert, I might take a small taste and I am more than happy with that. It's all about choices...Occasionally I steal a few french fries from someone's plate (someone always orders fries!)...but I won't order them or eat them frequently. I don't deprive myself either...If I want a taste...I do! Plain and simple...a few fries is better than a plateful. Moderation is easy once you embrace it and begin eating better foods...After a while sugary, greasy and heavy foods just taste awful and make you feel awful...Surgery gets your belly out of your head! LOL Seriously...Your belly teaches your head an entirely new way of eating and as long as you maintain that attitude and listen to your surgery (pouch or even lap band) You can do this forever...As soon as you allow your head to take over, you will not be able to control your desires...like you are now...Hopefully your doctor will go thru with the surgery even if you don't lose weight...But you might give it a litttle extra effort in menu choices...Try ordering a lean meal more often than not...Don't eat fast food...get a lunchmeat sandwich and a fresh fruit rather than chips...You don't have to go hungry...EAT! Just eat leaner! Try it...Little things make a HUGE difference...Then at the end of the day you feel unsatisfied...have what you were craving...At least you cut back calories all day... Good luck with your diet...and give yourself a break...You will eat again...Just not like an obese person. Start with small changes for now and work your way up to the harder pre op diet later...After surgery you are forced into discipline...and you adjust and learn what it feels like to be able to move and bend and twist and not take tons of meds and have energy and you realize that eating out of control is what put you there in the first place...You learn to appreciate everything in moderation...
   — .Anita R.

July 7, 2008
I think all of us ask ourselves the same questions pre-operatively; (1) If I could lose the weight on my own, I wouldn't need surgery right? (2) I am completely addicted to food, how am I supposed to lose weight without having WLS? (3) Do these people really expect me to lose weight? I didn't have this requirement because I was a self pay and the whole process between first appointment and surgery only took a few weeks.... but just about everyone I know had to go through the process in order for insurance to pay. I guess you have to ask yourself what you really want? What are you willing to do to get what you want? I suggest making little changes, cut back on carbs, drink lots of water and do ten minutes of exercise per day. I could only do 2 minutes on the treadmill at first so that's what I did. The next day I did 3 mins, and so on. Those little changes everyday really add up. Good luck, Dawn Vickers, RN, BLC, CLC
   — DawnVic

July 13, 2008
This sounds like "Head Hunger". You fear that you "will never get to eat again" and you are freaking out. Therefore your mind/emotions aren't dealing with the idea of being depraved. Please consider this surgery carefully. Having this surgery does not mean you will never get to eat again. You will be able to eat, just smaller portions. If you don't deal with the issues that have caused you to eat & gain wait now, you won't be successful after the surgery. I am a nurse who has had RNY and have taken care of GBP & lap band patients who have been non-compliant and just not gotten the concept of the significant lifestyle and diet changes they need to make. Please see your surgeon & talk with a psych professional or counselor before your surgery.
   — CHARLYLVN

July 14, 2008
First of all I think a lot of us went through the as people call it goodbye phase. But you have to remember most of these foods you will probably be able to eat again in moderation just not right away after surgery. Also you have to remember what has gotten you to where you are at this stage in life (eating everything that you want as much as you want), I am not saying you will be able to just give it all up today and you won't have to completely give it up. I went out to dinner with my daughter the other day and she ordered a piece of french silk pie I took a little bite, I did not fall over dead and was able to be satisfied with that small nibble. I too was worried before my surgery but then always would remind myself what the surgery could help me do. I am now two and a half months out and down 48 pounds (78 pounds total) and only have 37 pounds to go. So hang in there, and most are right about the insurance they just need proof that you tried other methods to lose weight before you resorted to surgery.
   — Melanie C.




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