Question:
I need help telling my employer about my decision to have surgery.

I work for a doctor and I really love my job. The problem is I just went back to work after being gone for 2 months due to a sick family member that I had to care for. I quit my job and after 2 months they asked me if I wanted my job back, and since my family situation was resolved, I was very happy to go back to work. Today I got approval for my surgery after just one week and I have a date of August 28. Now I am scared to have to ask for time off when I just started back 2 weeks ago. I do have one week vacation time, but I know I need more time than that. I am also scared about what I should tell my employer because he is a doctor. I am scared to tell the truth because I don't want him to be mad at me after giving my job back and me knowing that I would be having major surgery. I just didn't think I would be approved so quickly. There is only 2 other ladies in the office so we are a very small office. I feel guilty leaving my job, but I have to do this for me and I really want to have this surgery. Can anyone give me some ideas of what to tell my employer? I hate to tell him weight loss surgery because I am afraid of hearing a lecture from him. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!!!    — Melissa L. (posted on July 24, 2000)

July 25, 2000
Melissa, There are laproscopic procedures out there that allow you to be back to work in 1 week. You could check them out. My surgeon Dr. Rutledge does the Mini Gastric Bypass ( with great results) in Durham NC. You are only in the hospital overnight. Check it out http://clos.net It might be to your advantage to travel to NC. to be able to keep your job. People come from all over to have him do their surgery.
   — Glenda E.

July 25, 2000
I had an open RNY and was only out of work for 2 weeks because I have a desk job. I was ready to come back and had no problems at all doing so. I understand your work concerns, and they are valid. I just started my job in late November and had surgery in May and had no idea how they would react. Even though you work for a doctor, you are under NO obligation to tell them what kind of surgery you're having. Since it is a very small office, you may just have to come out and say that it's very personal and you don't want to discuss and that hopefully they will respect your wishes. I can sympathize with your position, but the bottom line is that this surgery means your health. You can either take the time now to handle it or you can take the time later when you get sick. There isn't ever a "good" time to have surgery. Hang in there and best of luck.
   — Paula G.