Question:
I will NEVER get to goal weight?
Hi all, I know something like this question was asked earlier, but I have a slightly different spin. My surgeon, internist and now FAMILY have all told me not to expect to ever be thin? I am 5'6" and my personal goal weight is 175, I am now 384, so...everyone says I CAN'T do this!?! Why not? Is it my body? (180# lean body mass) Please help, I feel SO depressed. — Erinn D. (posted on August 18, 2003)
August 18, 2003
Hi! I am not sure why they tell you you wont get to goal weight. I was
5'5 and 388 pounds. Today, almost a year and a half later, I am about 215
pounds. I am having my arms done and a TT tomorrow morning at 6 am. Time
has gone by so fast. It has been wonderful. I really dont have a specific
goal weight. I feel so good, I figure I will lose about 30 pounds over the
coming months and we will see...... Who knows where I will end up. To me
- how I feel is more important that any number that I get to. Good Luck-
Mandy
— Mandybub
August 18, 2003
I don't know that "thin" should be the goal but don't listen to
your family. If you work at it you will do well. My husband was skeptical
about my ability to lose but I am about 16 months post op and down 190lbs
from 380 (5'7") I'm still losing albeit slowly. Don't let anyone
discourage you you CAN do this.
— Laurie B.
August 18, 2003
Don't let anyone tell you what you can and cannot do. I did not have quite
as much to loose, but today I wore a size 12 to work from a size 24.
Somebody said something about the surgery. I said the surgery helps but I
am dieting. I am determined. I have fallen off the wagon a couple of
times and grazed all day...not on sugar and stuff, but grazed non the
less... I get control and then off again. I try to exercise 30 minutes a
day and drink when I think I am hungry. So, I can do it and You can do it
and my sister in law can do it. You need to take one day at a time. When
I plato or feel down I read Dr. Atkins or a health magazine on pointers to
jump start my weight loss.... yep, I think about this all the time, and I
am determined to get to my goal. Go to support meetings...don't try to do
this alone. The surgery will probably not help you get to 175 but your
determination with the help of the surgery will. I feel so much better -I
just want to jump up and down...I will say a little prayer for you...We are
all in this together.
— Sandy C.
August 18, 2003
Don't let anyone tell you what you can and cannot do. I did not have quite
as much to loose, but today I wore a size 12 to work from a size 24.
Somebody said something about the surgery. I said the surgery helps but I
am dieting. I am determined. I have fallen off the wagon a couple of
times and grazed all day...not on sugar and stuff, but grazed non the
less... I get control and then off again. I try to exercise 30 minutes a
day and drink when I think I am hungry. So, I can do it and You can do it
and my sister in law can do it. You need to take one day at a time. When
I plato or feel down I read Dr. Atkins or a health magazine on pointers to
jump start my weight loss.... yep, I think about this all the time, and I
am determined to get to my goal. Go to support meetings...don't try to do
this alone. The surgery will probably not help you get to 175 but your
determination with the help of the surgery will. I feel so much better -I
just want to jump up and down...I will say a little prayer for you...We are
all in this together.
— Sandy C.
August 18, 2003
I think all those people telling you it can't be done are trying to help
you avoid possible future disappointment since many people don't make it to
that goal weight they have set in their head. That said I can tell you that
my doctor told me I needed a more realistic goal when I told him what I
wanted to weigh. I weighed over 400 pounds when I had the surgery and I
thought 130 would be a good weight for my height. He said he would be
satisfied if I got to 220. I'm going in for a lower body lift next week for
skin removal that will put me at least 15 pounds BELOW the weight I thought
I should weigh. I'll actually be underweight for the first time in my life!
(Not that that's a good thing) So you can reach any goal you set for
yourself as long as you're willing to work at it and realize that it may
take more than a year to get there. Just keep pluggung away and good luck
to you on your weightloss journey!
— Traci H.
August 18, 2003
I would LOVE to get to 175...and before I had surgery, I thought for sure I
would get there. I started at 405, and I kept reading and reading about
all these SUPER OBESE people losing wieght like crazy, and I really hoped I
would be one of those people...well, 7 months later, I am down about 115
lbs to 290, and I have never felt better...I feel like I am losing slow,
but I am hoping to get to at least 230 lbs. Honestly, if I get to 230
lbs, I can do all those things on YOUR list...and alot of them, I can do
now. Don't get depressed, just do the best you can, and I think you will
find that your personal goals will change as you move on in your
journey...but you will feel great about yourself, you will look HOT, and
you will do everything on your list of wants!
— thekatinthehat
August 18, 2003
175 sounds reasonable. But I too think they don't want you to be
disappointed. I could only get 84% of my weight off. I'm now at 81% which
is where my body wants to settle (weight goes from 162-164). I had hoped to
get to 129 or 130 which is the middle of the BMI range for my short height.
I started at 319 and lost 160 of the 190 pounds I wanted to lose. All we
can do is our best. Sometimes it is'nt our fault. Our body will settle
where it wants... but we should try for the best. ;)
— Danmark
August 18, 2003
I agree with the last poster - 175 sounds very reasonable to me. Everyone
told me the same thing and I have passed all of their goals. I am
5'5" and they wanted me to weigh around 165. My personal goal is 145
and I'm only 9 lbs away. Keep working out, getting your fluids and protein
and you'll do fine.
— kandi S.
August 18, 2003
Tell your surgeon, internist and family to take a flying leap. I am 5'9,
started at 442 and now weight 292 in a little over 6 months. My surgeon
and I had never discussed a goal weight until last week at my 6 month
visit. I had set an initial goal of anywhere under 250 as I have gotten to
240 before and I knew what life was like at that weight and I knew I could
definitely handle it long term. However, he said that was too high for how
far I have already come, but he felt that 200 lbs was very reasonable for
me. So 175 for you sounds very reasonable also. He said I could make it
into the 180's but would take a lot of effort and with my body issues
(fibromyalgia, low back and foot problems) he realized that just might not
happen. I was pretty much thinking 200 lbs was reasonable also so I was
glad to see he wasn't shooting for some number from an insurance book like
156 - 165 as that is just too thin for me.
<p>Do yourself a favor and set some interim goals and focus on them
rather than the big picture. It will make it seem less insurmountable.
Losing 209 lbs can definitely be done. Just take it slow and easy and
follow your post-op plan to the T and you will see wonderful success.
Don't fret though if that 175 never comes about. You will be so much
healthier and be able to do so much more it will be amazing. Good Luck and
I hope you get your surgery soon.
— zoedogcbr
August 18, 2003
My goal 185 I started at 370+ now Iam 175-180 below goal... 5lbs below!!
you can do it ... Only your body will will set its own goal weight Mother
nature knows best ;)
— Robert L.
August 18, 2003
I think that they say this because they don't want to see you disappointed
yet again but it can be frustrating. My solution would be to stop chatting
about it with them and they will let it go and later they will eat those
words. I also want to suggest that after surgery you regularly see a
nutritionist as you have a lot to lose and it will definitely help to keep
you on track as well as teaching you a ton about new ways to eat and new
ways to think about food. The studies have shown that people who regularly
take advantage of professionals (i.e. nutritionist, therapist, etc...) lose
more quickly and more steadily across the board. I rely heavily on my
nutritionist and have lost really well with no plateaus at all. YOU CAN DO
IT!!!! Good luck! :)
— Carol S.
August 18, 2003
Don't become to obsessive about a number. You just set yourself for
disappointment. Think about how you feel and to some extent what size you
wear although that can be decieving also with flappy skin. Celebrate the
trip down. My high was 370 and I was 344 right before surgery. My 1st goal
was to get under 300. I cried, it had been over 10 years since I weighed
under 300. I'm also 5'6 so my next celebration was at 100 pounds lost which
also put me out of morbidly obese. I got contacts (after I finished
crying). I've just celebrated becoming obese by coloring my hair blond (has
anybody else noticed how many "afters" are blond? Is this an
undocumented side effect?). My "goal" is 180 which makes me not
obese just "overweight" but if I don't make it, so be it. I now
weigh 208 which is less than I did when I graduated from HS (I'm 47). I
wear size 18 tops and size 20 pants. I can now shop in almost all stores, I
buy my pantyhose at Walgreens!!! On sale!!! I bought underpants at Costco!!
Enjoy the journey. Good luck
— Sunny S.
August 19, 2003
I think your goal weight is entirely reasonable. If you follow the rules,
my opinion is that you can certainly get there. Use the low expectations
of other to motivate you even more. You can do it!
— mom2jtx3
August 19, 2003
Hey, my surgeon said I would probably only lose another 20 lbs, which would
be about 20 lbs above my personal long-term goal! New goal - prove him
wrong! You can get there!
— koogy
August 19, 2003
YES YOU WILL!!! Who is the boss of you??? YOU ARE!!! Are you gonna let
other's tell you how to run your life? Of course not!! You make your
world. If you want the "carrot" bad enough you will work your
ass off to get it! Don't let other's tell you who YOU are! I totally
understand your depression. You have the world at your finger tips..don't
let the negative people get you down!!!
Keep up the good work!! Best wishes...aims
— chickiewickie
August 19, 2003
Erinn, I know that it is easier said than done, but you shouldn't focus on
a goal weight that is so far away. I started at 377 and today I weigh 195.
I'm very happy at this weight because I have my health and life back. I
would rather be at a weight that I can maintain than torture myself over a
"goal" weight. I did that for too many years. Make healthy your
goal and you'll get there for sure!
— Pamela B.
August 19, 2003
I fully agree wiht not setting a goal weight. I always thought it was
strange my surgeon and I never discussed one pre-op but I think he knew for
me it was better not to. It would have seems such a huge hill to climb.
Now that I'm down to 292, hitting 200 lbs seems very reasonable to me. I
dealth with discussing a goal weight at 6 months so much better than I
would have pre-op. It also allowed me to see how things went and plan
accordingly.
— zoedogcbr
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