How common are bowel obstructions????

I am ANGRY today.. I have this cousin who is a RN and she insists on sending me horror stories about people getting bowel obstructions etc and then dying or having terrible complications from then on.. What cause bowel obstructions.. does it matter which surgery?? She also has managed to find every person on this planet that wished they didn't have the surgery and told me all about their pain, suffering etc etc... Please give me so ammo to fire back.. I know that this surgery isn't a peice of cake.. but I need to lose 200 pounds and I have learned I can't do it by myself.. I just need a little support today I guess...Thanks

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