Hi, I am 8 mos post op and

Hello I am 8 mos post-op. I almost died during my surgery and afterward. As soon as I was well enough again to start going out approx. 4 mos. I started gambling. I knew we didnt have the money and I never had a problem before surgery. I just wanted to be out and doing something. Well I have been late on my mortgage payment now for 4 mos. I have totally stopped gambling for at least 2 mos, but I cant repair the damage that I have done. I had a problem with Gambling about 2 years ago. My husband doesnt know and if I tell him he will divorce me. I am now seeing a counselor, but I am so distressed about this that I am considering suicide. i am soooo upset. I just think if I end it all, than I wont know if he will truly hate me for this. I really dont know what it was. The thought of dying or what. Can anyone help.

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