I NEED ADVICE FROM RNY OVER 50 PLEASE!

Please read on. I hope this doesn't come out too jumbled and intense... I really need advice.

My mom just had her VSG declined due to her insurance. Her insurance only covers RNY and now she is determined to have WLS; even if it is RNY.
Her surgeon is just putting in the paperwork and getting ready to do it for her this month.

My mom is a 56 year old diabetic; weighing 280 lbs and a height of 5'6.
I am so scared that RNY is much too dangerous for her.
Although she's had quite a few surgeries (appendectomy, thyroidectomy, knee surgery, etc) I feel that the RNY might be too dangerous for her. :(

It should be noted that my mom's mother has diverticulitis (tiny intestinal holes) and in our family is kinda prone to anemia. So, that little piece of HISTORY frightens me in regards to my myom's long term success with RNY.
I mean, my mom's diabetes is 12 years strong and it is dangerous as is.
She has to have a knee replacement soon also, and so it IS much better for her to lose atleast 60 lbs before knee surgery. She cannot do it on her own at all.
But RNY is so hardcore... I don't know what to feel... All this is so serious that its overwhelming. 
 
Maybe if I could see "RNY over 50" from your eyes; maybe then I wouldn't be this terrified.

Please; any advice? 

God bless you.

I am pre-op, not post-op so take my opinion with that in mind.  I am 58 and will be having RNY as soon as I can get scheduled.  From what my doctor has told me, it is the best option for diabetics.   Any surgery has its risks, but I decided on RNY after much research.

Thank you :)

Sweetie, all surgery is dangerous so I'm not going to pooh-pooh your feelings at all.
Your feelings are validated.

Now, what you need to do is find peace with your mom's decision to have WLS. You need to support her 100%. Tell your mom to start reading our forum. We will give her support.
I can't take your fear away but I can tell you this:

I'm a revision to RNY, I had my first WLS in 1980, it was called a Gastroplasty (stomach stapling) It was suppose to be safer than RNY, less invasive, no malabsorbtion. I was in my early 20's. I'm 55 years young now, had RNY 4 years ago. I've had lots of surgeries and I survived RNY surgery, lost weight, got rid of my Esophageal reflux, Gerd, control now of my high bloodpressure, less back pain and much more. I have my health back. I can play with my grandkids. I'm living life.

Long term success with any WLS is called: Lifestyle change and that includes exercise.
I think your mom will do fine, but I don't know her. It's not all rainbows and sunshine but I try to make it be.

Just know your mom has made her decision and all you can do now is to support her.
I'll pray that God grants you peace with your mom's decision.
Now you look forward and not back. Be her biggest cheerleader and take walks with her.
Hugs
Debbiejean

Your concerns are certainly heartfelt for your mom.

Many insurances do not cover the sleeve -it was not an option for me. I had RNY at age 53 and had NO complications and a VERY smooth recovery. But ALL bariatric surgery is a major surgery and there are many things to consider.

Try a google search under "Gastric bypass diabetes cure." There are increasing numbers of medical studies that show that RNY's alteration of the digestive system offers a quick and effective cure for diabetes. 60 minutes did a piece on this, as well, some years back which I think you can find on YouTube.

You may want to go with your mom to meet her surgeon and ask some questions. It is important to know that she is working with a highly trained bariatric surgeon, and to ask what the most common type of complications are that he sees.

Best of luck to you and mom!

I had RNY surgery at age 68 1/2 -- I was on four pills for diabetes, and also on meds for high blood pressure.  The surgery went smoothly, and the recovery also.  I was back at work at my part time job in 2 1/2 wks.   My diabetes is now considered diet controlled and I take no meds for it or high blood pressure.  My blood glucose readings when I exercise regularly (usually 5 X a week) run from 96 to 109.

Your Mom needs to read as much as possible on this surgery.  All surgery is dangerous, but with confidence in her surgeon and medical staff she should be just fine.

Ask her to join our Over Fifty forum -- we'd be glad to have her on board.

Pat R.

Hi Amy_Lou,
     I had my RNY this year. I'm 60 years old. My blood sugar was 283 the day before surgery. It's been in the 80's every since (diet controlled now.) I'm off my blood pressure medication and my heart med dosage has been cut in half. My knee pain is so much less. I'm going to have a left knee replacement this year. I am so thrilled with my life since RNY. I'd do it again in a heartbeat. The first few months are the hardest I think, but then I'm only 5 months out from surgery.  Thinking of you and your Mom.   Take care,   Mag  
    

I had my RNY at 49; I didn't have a choice, that was all my surgeons did at that time. I had no complications, but I too ahd diverticulitis, Barrett's esophagus (precancerous condition in the esophagus), high blood pressure, degenerative disc disease, arthritic knees. I since have had a knee replacement plus a revision of the knee replacement, and let me tell you, not to scare you, but the RNY was the best decision I made and the knee replacement the worst.

I am nearly 7 years out and so glad I had this surgery. Now, my arthritis did not reverse itself ... I still have back and knee pain, but I did regain a half inch because the discs quit being compressed by the pounds I had piled on (I was 350 at my heaviest).

RNY is very safe; but yes, there are complications from any surgery. I went into it knowing there could be complications. I thought what will be, will be. But if I didn't do anything, I knew I would either be dead or would be in a wheelchair by the time I was 60.

I have had anemia post-op and am on iron; just another supplement I take. I'm happy to take as many supplements as I have to to keep myself healthy.

TO EVRYONE THAT RESPONDED:

THANK YOU SO MUCH, FROM DEEP WITHIN MY HEART.

SUCH BRAVE AND BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE I HAVE FOUND HERE ON OH.

I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE MORNING; SO THAT I CAN SHOW MY MOM THIS PAGE!

MAYBE SHE WILL JOIN OH TOO! I'D LOVE HER TO SEE LADIES IN HER AGE GROUP.

SHE IS REALLY BEAUTIFUL AND WONDERFUL AND STRONG...

I HAVE NO DOUBT SHE WILL BRIGHTEN YOUR DAY THE WAY YOU'VE BRIGHTENED MINE.

GOD BLESS ALL OF YOU!

Amy Lou,

You've gotten lots of good responses here and I do hope your Mom will consider joining us, as I began researching WLS 2 years before I scheduled a consult and began participating and gathering information from the wonderful people who populate this board several months before my surgery. 

My experience was that I watched other family members do it and they had wonderful results, except one, who did not change her habits and she gained most of her weight back.  I had a cousin who had diabetes for 25 years pre-WLS, within 6 months she was off all diabetic medication and her doctor was the one who told her that she needed to consider this surgical option, because her diabetes was no longer responsive to medication and he told her that in all likelihood she would be dead within 6 months if she did not have the surgery. 

I had mine at 52 and like most everyone else said, it was the best decision I could have made for myself, my younger granchildren have a much different grandmother than the older ones, I can run, play and do things with them that at 254 lbs. I could not do.  I am healthier and while maintenance is largely about making right choices, taking vitamins and exercise to keep healthy, your Mom can do it.

On a last note, so long as she is in the capable hands of a skilled doctor, she follows the rules given her, she will do fine.

Best wishes to your Mom and kudos to you for being such a supportive and caring part of her life.

Laureen