OT - my sorry self
Julia
Margaret,
I am so happy to finally "see" you. And I see an attractive woman. Pity the poor males who expect 20 something looks in a mature woman. It never fails to amaze how many times men seem to stlll see themselves as they were in their 20s. . .
They should turn that mirror around and take a clear look at themselves before judging others. I am sure it must be hard. Don't give up.
We have a local group here called "Fun, fit, and over 50." I think it's a national group. Anyone can join: single people, married couples anyone looking to enjoy the company of others. They have reading groups, take hikes, go camping, have social gatherings. A person is welcome to join any or all of them. You might see if there is anything like that in your area. I do know of several "matches made in heaven" that resulted from dating sites, so I know it can happen. You don't really want someone that is that shallow do you?
At this stage of life were I alone I think I would prefer that to settling for someone who doesn't appreciate me inside and out. I don't need someone who thinks of me as only a cook and a maid! I think as we mature we really finally figure out that we are worthy of the best and we shouldn't settle for less.
I think I would go one step further and ask that man to be honest. Tell him that you thought you had a lot in common and you're curious about why he wouldn't want to explore the getting to know each other at least until there was a "red flag" that you didn't click.
No great experience here in the dating arena. Mine was 40 some years ago. I'm sure things have changed more than I can imagine.
Karen C
Karen C
Been there, done that, bought the book. The 60 year old men I meet are looking for 35-40 year olds. It's the 75 year olds who think I'm hot, at the ripe "old" age of 61. But I'm not looking to support anyone or cook and clean for them (hell, I hardly do that for myself any more), or change their diapers. (Not that all 75 year olds wear diapers, but I imagine you get the idea....
)I thought that when I lost the weight a miracle would happen and all the men who wouldn't look at me when I was fat would miraculously see "the real me" that now exists. Unfortunately, in my case at least, I've become so independent and outspoken after being alone for so many years that I scare the hell out of most of them. I'm like Karen...I'd rather stay alone than be with someone who isn't just right for me. And the frustration of the search and the recurring disappointment has pretty much turned me off the whole process at this point.
On a more positive note...I have several friends "of a certain age" who have met some very nice men on line, and are actively involved in very good relationships.
Unfortunately, for me, they know what they have is good, and they're keeping those men to themselves.
I think you look fine. I think I look fine. We have life experience that far outweighs what the Barbie dolls have. As for the shallow men who can't see that, it's their loss. Sometimes it has nothing to do with us in particular, just that they met someone else sooner than they met us, and have stopped looking ... for a while.
OK. Off the soapbox now. You hit a major nerve with your post. I hope things work out for you. As for me, my skin isn't thick enough to continue to search for Mr. Right. Or even Mr. Right Now....
Candy
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margaret- i am NOT trying to downplay your feelings-and i understand them.....i can't add anything
maybe he realizes that he isnt worthy of you???????????
hugs f!!! and thank you for a pic!!!!!!!!
I get up every morning determined to both change the world and have one hell of a good time. Sometimes this makes planning my day difficult.
- E. B. White
