I lost my Mom...

Last Saturday, JB and I were cruising in Key West, Florida..we had intentions of heading to Naples and I looked forward to hopefully meet Carla and Monica there the next day or so for lunch but we had been carefully avoiding tornados and bad storms so our schedule was a little eratic.

On Friday, Mom's Head Nurse had called just to say that Mom had fallen and wasn't feeling well but was responsive and no pneumonia tho she had congestion again, nor damage from the fall and we were not to worry.

Then I got a call Saturday afternoon from Mom's Seniorcare facility that she wasn't doing well at all now and was becoming unresponsive, choking on heavy congestion and no longer able to cough it up and it didnt look good. We immediately turned north and headed for home.

I called Derek and he immediately went to see Mom and sat with her for several hours, holding her hand and assuring her that everything would be alright. 

He was such a great comfort to Mom, I know...Derek was always her favourite grandchild...likely that mischevous glint in his eyes always made her laugh...but he sat with her, reassured her, told her everything would be alright and held her hand the whole time.  He said she couldnt talk anymore (her body was shutting down) and whenever she looked at him with big eyes, he said he flashed his big silly grin at her ...omg..I'm so sure that made her happy that he was there with her....he said that she hung so tightly to his hand...all the times I've been with her and I had to be so very far away when she died!

 Danny (our older son) and his wife Amy still don't know..they are in Las Vegas with Dan's boss..Dan & his boss are attending an electronics (Dan is an electronics engineer) trade show to buy equipment .. his boss owns Insight Avionics where Dan designs and builds electronic devices for Lear Jets and other planes. The boss suggested that Dan bring his wife, Amy, along and stay the rest of the week..Boss leaves Tuesday and he pays for Dan & Amy to stay til Saturday so I cannot reach Dan....he comes home NEXT Saturday.  Mom will be cremated this week and buried with Dad likely the following Saturday.

....I know that Mom is "back home", in peace, comfort and joy and reunited with my Dad. The hardest part was that we were so far away.

We just got home this afternoon...trying to avoid the tornado warnings and storms, then caught on the I-90 for 90 minutes, even with the car turned off, before we were re-routed to highway 20...must have been a huge accident..heaven knows the winds were strong and scarey! A long and exhausting trip.

As soon as we got over the border, we headed straight for the funeral home....I had to identify her body before cremation.   I was able to stroke her cheek and her beautiful snow white hair and talk to her for a while.... and as I left, I said to her, as I always did every week when I left her, "You behave now, Mom!" and she would always respond, "I will try, but..."...and I'm sure I heard her today....*s*..."I will try but..."

Of course, the usual paperwork and arrangements had to be done and all is completed now until our other son returns from Nevada.

Mom will be cremated and buried with Dad who passed away 16 years ago..she missed him so much! She didn't want a visitation or public burial, just a private family graveside interment so we will wait til Dan gets back and bury her the day before Easter Sunday. She had always said, "bury me when it's convenient to get them all together...".....  and then we will all go to Mom and Dad's favourite restaurant (though it's pretty far out from there) and feed the gang.

I can "see " Mom shrugging off her body like a heavy winter coat and stepping over the threshold into the light.   I am grateful that she no longer has to struggle to breathe and to be so frail and weak anymore...now she is dancing with Dad.  I am getting a new headstone made for them both..it will read "TOGETHER AGAIN".

Mom would have been 92 this winter. I miss her already.

Nancy B

nancy i do not have words....i know how special your mother is and how she will be missed. know that you are all in my prayers......
margo

Isn't that just like a mom to be sure everyone was busy and happy so she wouldn't be a bother to them.  And like a grandma, to finagle a little quality time with her favorite grandson

I am so sorry for your loss.

Nancy, so sorry for your loss. Especially difficult while you away for the much needed and deserved vacation. I can imagine the trip home all to well, living our RV lifestyle. I am glad you got home safely.
Take a deep breath and let it out. She is home with God and her husband. Prayers for you and yours.
Monica

Prayers for you and yours.

nancy,
  I'm so very sorry for your loss. I do believe that your mom is still with you and always will be...just believe. 
  Someday you may see a beautiful angel...she'll be there.

  Prayers and love to you and your family.

  Marcy

I am so sorry for the loss of your mom.  Moms are special people, 

Oh Nancy, I am so sorry.  Losing one's mother is one of the most difficult losses of our lives.
You worked so hard to be there for your mother and to help her.  You were a wonderful daughter.  Your mom must have been so grateful to have had you in her life.
Margaret

So sorry for your loss You were lucky to have her to make the woman that you are now

Good Job Mom

I said a prayer

Nancy,

I am so sorry to hear about your dear mom. Warm thoughts and prayers for comfort and strength are sent your way.

Cheryl