Mom is 69 and being questioned OOC

My mom got a call this morning from the Dr's office and asked to come in.  They need more info.  Only problem is that her Dr who is wonderful is out of town til the end of March.  The fill in asked my mom why she wanted the surgery at almost 69 years of age.  My comment would have been so I could see 79 years of age and various other things.
Then the woman proceeded to tell my mom the surgery wasn't meant for people like her, only for the extremely obese.  My mom's BMI has been close to 45 for almost all of her adult life... up and down of course.
She is diabetic, has high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and many other weight related problems.  Her panni is bigger than my fanny... ok hangs very low and causes the skin to tear, yet there is too much of her for them to remove it at this time.

So I'm curious, would you try and fight it to any degree on your own with OHIP while waiting for your dr to come back home, interrupt his vacation even though he would not have access to his files, or just wait for him to come back home?

Is it so odd that a very young 68 year old woman who is still very active and has a father who is going strong at 95 would want to have a chance to taste a little freedom from fat?  That she needs to control her sugars in some way and does not seem quite capable with food alone.

So I am hoping there are some oldtimers here with some advice I can offer her.


I love my mom and want her to be around for a long, long time.

if there was one thing i learned in my own fight for my surgery-it was that I had to be my best advocate-i had to fight and fight some more-and many more have fought harder!

certainly your mom deserevs a better quality of life-my god, 68 is NOT old...and 45 BMI is def a qualifier..i understand we are talking canada vs us but ...she should fight!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

jmho!

I would say that doctor is one who is not educated in bariatrics to have made that kind of remark.
I had my surgery at 58 years old. I had high blood pressure, borderline diabetes, congetive heart failure, depression, severe edema,joint pain. I lost 140 pounds and have no health issues at all now. My surgeon told me I had added at least 10-15 years to my lifespan by having this surgery.
I agree,,you are your best advocate,,FIGHT! Its worth every letter, complaint, whatever you have to do. I would do it again in a heart beat, every month if I had to, to be this healthy and happy.
Rooting for you!
Blessings
Betsy

what in the world is wrong with that doc? a bmi of 45 is super obese....hey check out my profile...im 68 the other day had surgery at 65 just got back from  a 4000 mile ride on the back of a Motorcycle went to Tucson, climbed mountains. hiked many a mile rode horses. rode in a racing desert dune buggy lol  any way how long will her doctor be out of town?  so to me now 68 is not old....my pcp just smiles now at me since all my test that i have taken now since surgery is perfect...hope your mom doesnt give up ....my surgeon operated on a lady 76 so no one is too old. 

Thank you good people for helping me to know I was on the right track.  Fight, fight, fight, we shall.

I know over the last week or so on other subforums I've hit some great links to appealing OOC   ~ out of country coverage ~ .  Now to go digging, deep with OH and deep within myself for helpful info to compile for my mom.  Then of course after I do I'll send her the link to this section of the board and let her see that she is neither too old, nor too thin... egads I still can not believe anyone trying to tell my mom she was not fat enough for this when all we have done our whole lives is fight the fat. 

Also going to have her find out if she is on a timeline of any sort to submit more info.

thanks!

Cushiebunny:

If her regular doctor (I'm assuming this is the PC) is positive about the surgery wait until he returns. She wants someone in her corner, fighting for her. I had a PC like that - who told me where to go - out of state. I was 70 when I had surgery - an RNY and have been very successful. Her diseases qualify her for surgery - but you would be surprised (maybe not) at the way some medical personnel negatively perceive this surgery. Maybe this replacement female doctor is a flake! Don't let Mom give up!!! I'm going to be 73 in the summer, can hike, dance, go up stairs without calling 911 and my husband brings me roses!

Hugs,
Rudie 2

You sound like such a wonderful daughter. I have only 2 sons and now 2 grandsons. How much I would have loved having a daughter who cared for me in the way you care for your mom.

Keep on fighting for your mom's life. She has so much to live for....especially a wonderful family. Please keep us posted.

// How much I would have loved having a daughter who cared for me in the way you care for your mom. //

Ahhh, but now you have us.  And I'd lay odds somewhere on this board you have relationships with woman that are mother daughter type of feelings.  The best part about that is you did not have to buy them all kinds of outifts when they were teens, worry about dating, have to pay for tampons...

I am the blessed one to have been born to my mom.  She is the very best mom a bunny could want and the very best Grammi to my little one.  It is kind of funny in a way as my daughter is like a mini me at times.  Watching her with my mom is looking winding a camera back in time. 

People joke with me now, of course they are serious but I take it as a joke.  They say, 'oh just wait til your dtr hits her teens and wants nothing to do with you'.  It's just isn't fathomable as my mom has always been my very best friend.

It is so great to hear from those of you here that seem to have a found a small fountain of youth in WLS.  I anxiously await the new freedoms for my mom, my hubby, and myself.  How's that for forming my own mini support group?  ~ laughs ~

Hi there, I was 64 years old having my surgery, and that was 2 1/2 years ago.  I feel so much better and so much younger.  I want to see my grandchildren present me with grandchildren.  I also wanted to stick around, and my dr. didn't question me at all.  I was fortunate that she was 100% behind me.  I just turned 67 a week ago and couldn't be happier.  I have gone from a 26 to a 10 and the difference in my activity level is amazing.  Tell your Mom to be persistent and not give up.  Some dr. do have a cut-off age for surgery, but I met a man 72 that had surgery and was doing great.  Good luck.