How Do Biggies React To Your "Great Pumpkin" Story?

Paul, I understand the attraction of sharing what has been for me, a Life-Saving Procedure, With others who could clearly benefit. Sort of like wanting to share one’s new-found Spiritual Salvation. I see some who keep the fact that they had WLS a total secret, and can’t quite understand. I’m very open with everyone that I had WLS. No "secret" here. However, at the same time, I refrain from ever, ever, recommending surgery to those who look like they need it. If asked how it worked for me? I’m a non-stop fount of anecdotes and info. But "what worked for me," isn’t something I’ll offer unless asked. I think if back when I was at my full size, if someone had offered- "Hey, WLS could really help you out." I’d have been pissed, and turned them off. When I was at my full size, what got me really looking into WLS Was seeing dramatic results and doing the research myself. I speak at a number of WLS support groups and seminars But typically as an example of the possibility of Extreme Complications. My surgeon has me speak to his groups because I am his one and only Complication case And he wants folks to be aware that it is very risky even when the odds are in your favor. I tell "How it went for me" and although it was a scary-story, It did have a happy ending. I share my experience with folks on WLS Message Boards and WLS Seminars Because by being there, they are clearly Asking for such info/experience. But just someone I work with, attend church with, etc? I keep my thoughts to myself. Those that have seen me drop to less than half my former weight Have asked. Others have not. I read these Boards as a lurker for 10 months prior to my surgery And didn’t post a single thing until I was about 11 months post-op. Even then I fear that sharing my experience may have turned some away from what might have been a life-saving surgery for them. But the idea of Persuading someone to walk into what I went through, Prevents me from "Advising" anyone to ‘Git-‘er-done. I hurt for people who are still carrying their extra weight, And empathize completely with them. But unless they as****ep it to myself. And if asked, I try to make sure I share my experience as- "This is What I Did." Rather than – "This is what You Should Do." Yes? Just MY Thoughts. Best Wishes- Dx

Paul, I agree with Dx's comments. I speak at/for Duke's WLS at seminars and support groups. In April I am going to speak with my WLS shrink to a bunch of young psychology students (jr. shrinks) about my WLS history and the mental aspects of the process. Back in October07 they took pictures and a video about my WLS success. I always talk about where I started at 460lbs, high blood pressure, sleep apnea, bad back, bad knees, acid reflux, etc... Then I tell them about what I have done and what has worked for me in losing 241lbs over 16 months. I also talk about how great my life is now that I really have a life worth living again. I talk about the WLS process and what I eat now and the way I am to exercise and really enjoy anything I want to do again. I think it works best when you "paint the picture" in their mind of the before and after results and let them start envisioning what their life would be like afterwards.  I work in a company with about 650 people and there are 3 or 4 guys that are in the 350-400+lbs range and they have seen my success and most have talked to me one-on-one about WLS. Not one of my MO co-workers has done anything to help themselves and our insurance will pay for the whole thing and we have one of the leading WLS centers (Duke) in the world right up the street. But as Dx said most guys will not do something to help themselves till they are almost on their death bed.  I also get asked by folks in stores and such because I have never changed my driver license picture. Since I renewed it right before I had surgery I hate to have to change it. I don't mind the 10 bucks but who wants to go waste an afternoon at the DMV if you don't have to. When I use my credit card they normally ask to see my ID so when I show them the picture it almost always get a reaction. Some folks want to talk about WLS and other just say how good I look now. I answer their questions and encourage them to look into the program at Duke for themselves, the other I say thanks a lot and hit the road.  It took me 5 years to decide that I could not do this on my own and after losing from 423lbs down to 305lbs back in 2000. I really thought I was winning but when I hit 460lbs just 5 years later I realized I was just kidding myself and it was going to kill me if I did not do something sooner than later. That the problem with becoming morbidly obese, if the change from BMI 25% to 58% was overnight you would freak out about all the mobility you lost and all the things you can't do anymore along with how lousy you feel all the time. But since obesity happens over a long time it SLOWLY robs you of your life, just a little each day, then we adjust or justify the change to ourselves and we keep on eating. I bet I told myself a zillion times, “I’ll do something about it tomorrow” but it never happened till I faced the facts and really got serious about the rest of my life...