Unsupportive folk

Amazing!

Initially that was hard for me.

Now - I try to be nice...But with some people that doesn't work.

I use me or all of the above:

• allergic (I have food sensitivities ,- real)
• I Get sick when I eat sugar
• I don't like it
• I don't eat things like that
• I'll take it home for later (to feed my BF)

When any of those don't work - the ***** in me takes over and I either dump the cake in a garbage as the person is watching, or dump a lot of salt on it as I smear it around on a plate, or ask the person "why is it important to you I eat that?"..And for worst food pushers "I don't eat things ?like that because I don't want to get fat, if you know what I mean"..As I look at their rolls of fat...(that one is mean - so only reserve that as a last choice - for someone you really don't like and *****ally deserves that)

I got some of my responses like "I don't care if I get fat" ...To which answer can be "and it shows" or "yes, I noticed, you are way past "getting". Unfortunately some people would test you over and over... Reserve the really mean response to that situation.

Often just asking them why it is important to them you want something that you really don't want to, takes care of it.

These are great responses. I may have to use a few next weekend at my nephews party.

"Oh I just found out I've got a touch of the Celiacs disease" = Perfect excuse not to eat anything with flour.

Oh wow!

We really don't have to say anything! Engaging at all is a losing battle. If she commented that we didn't take a coffee, we wouldn't care. We would just say no thank you if we didn't want one. But because it's cake, it triggers u****s our hot buttons.

I get it. People are rude and push food and judge us and want to see us fail. Engaging in it doesn't change them. It only fuels them.

My tactic: a simple no thank you, and when they ask again, "excuse me, I have to go..." to the washroom, check on my son, help clean, etc. And smile! Always smile!

Hi Blueberry81,

You will find out if you haven't already that people are waiting to see you fail. They want you to fail. They don't want you to look better, feel better, or achieve your goals. They want you to be miserable like they are. Don't be surprised even if you find out behind your back that some of these people are or were your good friends. And even when you lose your weight, don't be surprised to hear " Oh she cheated, She took the easy way out of losing weight". Yes I have heard that MANY times. Here is what I say to them **** YOU! Sorry, but it has NEVER been an easy road trying to lose weight as you well know. Do yourself a favor, if your friends or family don't support you, you don't need them. You need to take care of yourself. So you can live a long and HAPPY life. I was up to 410lbs and had the RNY. I am down to 247lbs. I feel FANTASTIC. I enter 5K walks all the time and do as much walking as I can. I bought a treadmill at home as well. This is the only exercise I do other then normal house work (mowing the lawn, help cleaning the house, etc.). This is the best thing you will ever have done for yourself. Get ready for a life altering change. You can do this and stay with it. There are times when it will be hard, but keep a picture of you at your heaviest and look at it when you want more motivation on losing weight. Take care hon!

Wow amazing response. Thanks i totally appreciate it. Congratulations on your weight loss. I know it wasn't an easy road.

I don't expect anyone other than myself to be supportive of my decision. I'm a pretty open book about my choice to have surgery, and if someone "pushes" at me, I'll tell them I've had RNY/Gastric Bypass Surgery and I cannot eat whatever it is they are offering. That usually shuts them up. Also saying "Your input is appreciated" does as well.

"My dietary choices are not up for discussion. I need you to respect this boundary. How is [child's name] doing these days?"

Then, every single time she does this, repeat your script exactly. Do not vary the words at all. Eventually, she'll get sick of hearing you repeat the same thing over and over to her and she'll give up.